Dating a virgin ~ the holy grail of dating or a burdonsome responsibility? Discuss.


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Faira is offline Faira Post #251  November 19,2009, 5:27am
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melincali wrote :
I do stand by what I say that I believe it is a naive outlook to think that sex before marriage leads to divorce.
I totally agree with this. Lots of happy couples have sex before marriage.

Mel, I sincerely doubt that you're a disagreeable person...
 
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timeless2 is offline timeless2 Post #252  November 19,2009, 5:45am
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well, I guess I was a cougar when I dated a virgin. He was 22 and I was late thirties. He really thought I was the cat's meow and initially I did not want to date him. I did question the significance of him being a virgin and he was not only cool but eager. It was great while it lasted and we both created many happy experiences. I do not know where he is now but I wish him well.
 
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Jacquiem is offline Jacquiem Post #253  November 19,2009, 4:51pm
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zal wrote :
J,
The people you talk about who put such a premium on "getting" sex were clearly not mature enough (or at least ready) to get married. The reason that those marriages failed is because the people shouldn't have been married in the first place. However, having sex before getting to know the other person wasn't the cause of the divorce or bad relationship. They could have had sex early in the relationship AND gotten to know the other person. It seems that they ONLY cared about the sex and thought sex was enough. It isn't.
My opinion of the people I know, based on conversations I've had with them, is that their focus on the great sex was their distraction away from who these people really were. Yes, they could have had sex early in the relationship and gotten to know their partners better, but they stayed stuck on the sex and ignored everything else, or didn't bother to dig deeper. Yes, they were immature for doing this.

You and I are basically saying the exact same thing. Just focusing on different aspects of it.
 
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