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ThePriestess thinks this place is great for advice on how to stay single!

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Dugl wrote :
Personally....I'd hang in there unless money was exchanged.
I'd leave unless money had been received =)
- October 27th, 2009, 06:52 pm
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pds857 Dang! The weekend is flyin in at high speeds, get ready for it people! lol

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marguitar wrote :
I have an amazing friendship with this incredible man in my life who gave me this heart saving advice just last weekend, and it seems very appropriate to the OP.
If you are in a relationship in which each of you currently desire a different outcome, level of intimacy, amount of romance, etc..., if your basic desires within the relationship are glaringly different from one other, you really only have two clear choices.
Either you accept your current relationship exactly as it is today, without hoping or trying to change the nature of it, (or him)
OR
You take the action necessary to kindly and considerately end the relationship if it is not acceptable to you exactly as it is, and move forward to search out a relationship that meets your needs and desires.

Do not wait around planning, dreaming, or scheming of how you might be able to change his mind, his heart, his character, his sex drive, or anything else! Accept it exactly as is, or take an appropriate action.

It seems as though the concept of "control" within a relationship has gotten a really bad rap, but I do believe, in this case, you need to understand that you do have some control over how things progress, or don't, in your relationships, and you are allowed to make decisions independently of anyone else's behavior/reactions.

Please don't "settle" for a relationship based on sexual attraction, affection, chemistry, or any of the other touchy feely things we can let run our emotions. Don't just listen to his words, pay attention to his behavior and actions.
Just my 2c.
Ok I have to say that I dont agree with what is highlighted in blue.
If I was to follow those words of advice, I'd never be where I am now with the most awesome fella I've known. We've been friends for 15yrs. An now we are steadily movin into a relationship with eachother, we are both on the same page an know that we want to try this out. I jus had to be Honest bout what I was thinkin an feelin, an he's thankful that I was because he didnt know how I really felt an I didnt know how he felt. (I aint met a mind reader yet) So I dont agree with that logic, sorry but it wouldnt have worked for me.

Now to what is highlighted in red I do agree with 100%. We have control to proceed in anyway we like. Its our choice to do as we wish an to follow our hearts an minds. The only way that control is taken from you at any point in your life, is by force. An No one is really Forcing you to continue a 'booty call' situation, it sounds like
he's startin to feel for ya, but then again, ya never really know with some fellas, it could all jus be to keep ya round so that ya'll can continue to use eachother. I'd be honest bout what you want, again, an if he still dont want what you want then move on an look for someone that does want the same things as you.

Jus my opinion.
- October 28th, 2009, 08:49 am
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Gr8Guyn2008 I wanna know what love is, I want you to show me

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jennyh wrote :
So I have had a booty call situation with this guy for a couple of months. At first it was all fun then I started to have feelings for him. I told him I liked him and his response was "I think you're extremely attractive" so I kind of got the point. I was hurt for a bit but then realized that I am not ready for a relationship myself. I still have a bit of a crush on him but I was pretty much okay with the arrangement we had. I started talking to other guys to help me see that there was more out there and to eventually break off things (but its so hard). Recently he has started to act different. Before it had been strictly about hooking up. Not very intimate I guess. He has told me he doesn't really like to cuddle and he was more about getting off than making me feel good. Lately he kisses me, cuddles me all night, and gets this little look in his eyes. He also has started focusing on me while we hook up. Last time he drove me home he said "bye babe" which he has never done before. In the past its been difficult to have a conversation about what we are because he's a man's man I guess. I'm really getting the feeling that he has feelings for me but its so confusing. I really do like him and would want to have a relationship but I don't know what to do at this point. Any advice? I just wish we could have more but I've heard you can never turn a booty call into a relationship.
Do you want an emotional relationship or don't you?

Contrary to what Tweet said, the odds of turning a booty call into a long term emotionally based relationship are slim.
- October 28th, 2009, 09:33 am
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jennyh wrote :
I started talking to other guys to help me see that there was more out there and to eventually break off things (but its so hard).
Try breaking it off when it's "Soft"...less distraction.

I never understood the term "Booty call". It's impossible to make calls with your booty. I've tried it and the keypad just isn't big enough
- October 28th, 2009, 10:46 am
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shellyg If stupidity got us into this mess, then why cant it get us out?

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but I've heard you can never turn a booty call into a relationship.

The word never is a word that should not be used in this statement. This is simply not always true.
- October 28th, 2009, 04:17 pm
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