bigfincat is offline bigfincat Post #141  October 21,2009, 5:57pm
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chawks64 wrote :
Okay, okay, coming in late too.

I'm reading all kinds of posts about "equality", and I agree that a lopsided relationship never works well. But I don't see that we need to contribute the same things, either. It's a bit redundant for both people to be really good at the same stuff. Maybe I don't bring in anywhere near as much money as he does, but I make a kicks$$ mahi mahi en papillote (which I do, by the way). Maybe he's not good as good at dealing with emotional family members in crisis as I am, but he can network and use connections I could only dream of to find them a new job within a week.

It's not a matter of contributing like for like and absolutely equal, it's seeing that both people contribute in the ways they are capable, in an amount that makes both feel they are valuable and cared for.

Yes, I like the traditional roles. After working all day at my ManJob, I desperately want to be a traditional woman. And I do see the man's role to be that of taking care of me. And that's my role as well, to take care of him. We just do that in the ways we mutually agree are best for us.
that's hot!

.....& you are making me hungry!
 
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jayjay is offline jayjay Post #142  October 21,2009, 5:59pm
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...things seem to have gotten quiet around here.

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chawks64 wrote :
And I do see the man's role to be that of taking care of me. And that's my role as well, to take care of him. We just do that in the ways we mutually agree are best for us.
And what ways do you like to take care of and be taken care of?
 
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chawks64 is offline chawks64 Post #143  October 21,2009, 6:09pm
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jayjay wrote :
And what ways do you like to take care of and be taken care of?
Well first I... okay, I'm not going to go there!

Shameful admission: I like it when a guy washes my car for me or fills the gas tank. I like it when he worries about me taking on the snarling dog at work. I like it when he tells me I'm beautiful. There's a HUGE list of possible "good stuff" a guy can do, but you get the picture.

What do I do to take care of him? That depends on what he needs. I was with a steelworker with arthritis for a while, and he needed his hands deeply massaged every night. Another ex was horrible with financial matters, so I would help him understand. Another was functionally illiterate, so I would rewrite his business letters for him.

Then, of course, there's (ahem) that.
 
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jayjay is offline jayjay Post #144  October 21,2009, 6:11pm
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...things seem to have gotten quiet around here.

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chawks64 wrote :
Then, of course, there's (ahem) that.
I take it you mean the cooking?
 
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chawks64 is offline chawks64 Post #145  October 21,2009, 6:12pm
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bigfincat wrote :
that's hot!

.....& you are making me hungry!


And it would be horribly cold by the time you got here.
 
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chawks64 is offline chawks64 Post #146  October 21,2009, 6:15pm
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jayjay wrote :
I take it you mean the cooking?
Um... YES! Of course!
 
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scarlet13 is offline scarlet13 Post #147  October 21,2009, 6:16pm
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scarlet13 wrote :
too late. I'm exhausted, and i have to start my new life tomorrow as a le$b!an.

ETA: this was to JayJay.
Just want to let everyone know that i've failed already, since i totally flirted with the grocery delivery guy just now. he was really cute.
 
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jayjay is offline jayjay Post #148  October 21,2009, 6:17pm
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scarlet13 wrote :
Just want to let everyone know that i've failed already, since i totally flirted with the grocery delivery guy just now. he was really cute.
You have you groceries delivered? So much for doing things for yourself.
 
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scarlet13 is offline scarlet13 Post #149  October 21,2009, 6:20pm
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jayjay wrote :
You have you groceries delivered? So much for doing things for yourself.
yep. it's only 6 dollars, and i hate grocery shopping.
 
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chawks64 is offline chawks64 Post #150  October 21,2009, 6:20pm
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scarlet13 wrote :
Just want to let everyone know that i've failed already, since i totally flirted with the grocery delivery guy just now. he was really cute.
Send him over here and I'll give it a shot. But I'm probably old enough to be his mother...
 
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