You Know A Guy Is A Player When He ....


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parakeetjordan is offline parakeetjordan Post #1  October 18,2009, 10:07pm
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I just got off the phone with a guy, who has scared me a little bit, because he has just said all the right things, and then some, to me. We have set a date to meet, and I'm afraid that he is a player, who knows just how to say all the right things to get me into bed. So, what I need from those of you who are players, or who have been used by players, is for you to finish the following sentence and help me recognize the signs of a player:

You know a guy is a player when he .....
 
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lacedwithhope is offline lacedwithhope Post #2  October 18,2009, 10:20pm
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He seems to say all the right things -- as if he is good at reading women and figuring out what they want to hear. He is often intelligent, so that many of his compliments and encouragement for you to relax and enjoy each other are seem sincere and therefore are quite effective. They are also good at eliciting behavior from you which is not typical: e.g., you're thinking, 'I don't normally _____, but it just seemed natural when I was with him.'

I'm not saying players are bad, but they are often skilled manipulators whose motives become obvious only in hindsight.
Last edited by lacedwithhope; October 18,2009 at 11:47pm.
 
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parakeetjordan is offline parakeetjordan Post #3  October 18,2009, 10:51pm
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lacedwithhope wrote :
He seems to say all the right things -- as if he is good at reading women and figuring out what they want to hear. He is often intelligent, so that many of his compliments and encouragement for you to relax and enjoy each other are sincere and quiet effective. They are also good at eliciting behavior from you which is not typical: e.g., you're thinking, 'I don't normally _____, but it just seemed natural when I was with him.'

I'm not saying players are bad, but they are often skilled manipulators whose motives become obvious only in hindsight.
Yikes. I am almost fearful to meet this man, who seems to be all that I am looking for.
 
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parakeetjordan is offline parakeetjordan Post #4  October 18,2009, 10:56pm
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What should I do to turn the tables on this man, if he is a player?
 
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SierraMountainAir is offline SierraMountainAir Post #5  October 18,2009, 11:07pm
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parakeetjordan wrote :
What should I do to turn the tables on this man, if he is a player?

Play *HIM*...just like a marimba!!!!
 
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lil_lamb is offline lil_lamb Post #6  October 18,2009, 11:16pm
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i'm curious as to what "all the right things" are to say to you. anyways, instead of trying to spot players, i'd put my energy into trying to spot a good man. also, i wouldn't waste my time turning the tables. i'd drop a player and move on faster than he could blink.
 
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SierraMountainAir is offline SierraMountainAir Post #7  October 18,2009, 11:21pm
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lil_lamb wrote :
instead of trying to spot players, i'd put my energy into trying to spot a good man.
I can't think of a more *perfect* way for you to get "played" than that.

(But take little note of me, I am rather cynical tonight!!)


lil_lamb wrote :
also, i wouldn't waste my time turning the tables. i'd drop a player and move on faster than he could blink.
But by then, it would have been too late, for a lil lamb, shorn of her wool !!

Too much optimism could be a trap for the unwary and naive....

Just sayin'.....
Last edited by 6dle899; October 18,2009 at 11:23pm.
 
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lacedwithhope is offline lacedwithhope Post #8  October 18,2009, 11:50pm
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lacedwithhope wrote :
He seems to say all the right things -- as if he is good at reading women and figuring out what they want to hear. He is often intelligent, so that many of his compliments and encouragement for you to relax and enjoy each other are seem sincere and therefore are quite effective. They are also good at eliciting behavior from you which is not typical: e.g., you're thinking, 'I don't normally _____, but it just seemed so natural when I was with him.' (Going against your instincts.)

I'm not saying players are bad, but they are often skilled manipulators whose motives become obvious only in hindsight.
The bold portions are what you want to watch out for.
 
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SierraMountainAir is offline SierraMountainAir Post #9  October 19,2009, 12:03am
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lacedwithhope wrote :
He seems to say all the right things -- as if he is good at reading women and figuring out what they want to hear. He is often intelligent, so that many of his compliments and encouragement for you to relax and enjoy each other are seem sincere and therefore are quite effective. They are also good at eliciting behavior from you which is not typical: e.g., you're thinking, 'I don't normally _____, but it just seemed natural when I was with him.'

I'm not saying players are bad, but they are often skilled manipulators whose motives become obvious only in hindsight.
Oh, you REALLY busted them, dint choo??!!


In truth, that is BRILLIANT, PERFECTLY SAID!!!


I hope your words get a lot of currency, around here, as they are absolutely spot on!!!


Men like that *ARE* around and they make things sooo bad for the decent ones still out there that would be utterly faithful, good and would adore you to the exclusion of ALL others.
 
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jayjay is offline jayjay Post #10  October 19,2009, 1:13am
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...things seem to have gotten quiet around here.

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parakeetjordan wrote :
You know a guy is a player when he .....
I think that's difficult to answer....as there are a variety of types of players. For example, I knew a guy in college who was the kind that would act very sweet and lead a woman to believe he really wanted a LTR with them. He'd spend several weeks with them....and then just drop them in a very cold way. He was really almost sociopathic the way he did it and after he did this with a few women at the college all the others knew to stay away from him.

There are other types of players who aren't 'sweet' but just know how to make you feel attracted to them. In the end I don't think you can reliably tell the difference between a guy who's a player and one who isn't....without getting to know them over time.
 
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