embarassed to say you met on EH?


Reply
  • Page 1 of 3
  • 1
  • 2
  • 3
 
Topic Tools Search this Thread
Andrea8823 is offline Andrea8823 Post #1  October 9,2009, 11:41pm
Andrea8823's Avatar

hates working all weekend

Quick Study

Joined: Jul 2009

Posts: 128

See profile

I've been talking to a guy for about 2 weeks now, and we're planning to hangout in a few days. The problem I'm having is that I'm somewhat embarassed to tell my friends that I'm hanging out with a guy I met on eharmony. I'm only 21, so not many people my age understand...because most of them are out meeting people at bars/parties.

Can anyone else relate? And if so, do you have any advice?
 
  Reply With Quote
gothustartus is offline gothustartus Post #2  October 9,2009, 11:59pm
gothustartus's Avatar

is thinking about someone special

Veteran

Joined: Jul 2009

London, England

Posts: 1,753

See profile

There is still a stigma of desperation to meeting someone on a dating site, and sometimes a kneejerk assumption that people who meet online meet on sex sites or chatrooms where the hookup is the goal.
About all i can say for advice though is if it bothers you then don't tell people you met online, tell them you met where you had your first date, it's true in a manner of speaking.
More and more people are using dating sites now though, just look at the membership numbers of the sites, so the odd looks from people judging you for not being able to get a "proper" date should be on the wane, much more chance these days that anyone you tell is on a dating site themselves.
 
  Reply With Quote
Shmolga is offline Shmolga Post #3  October 10,2009, 12:10am
Shmolga's Avatar

is 9.5, two more years and I'll be 10

Quick Study

Joined: Jun 2009

Posts: 69

See profile

That's easy. You tell your friends in about 10 years from now, when they are complaining to you about their miserable existence with their partners they met at the bars/parties and are begging you to reveal the secret of your happily-ever-after with the guy you met at.. well, you know.

OK, this time serious. Where did you meet him in person for the first time? If it's a coffee shop, than tell your friends you met him there. The rest is on the need to know basis and it sound like your friends, considering their maturity level, do not need to know
 
  Reply With Quote
k374 is offline k374 Post #4  October 10,2009, 12:14am
k374's Avatar

Quick Study

Joined: Jan 2009

Posts: 130

See profile

I guess there is an perception that those who resort to online dating websites somehow lack the social skills to flirt with the opposite sex in real life.

Personally I could not care less, I am on EH because I am very busy between my job and hobbies and my socializing is only with known friends and I don't care to hit on random women, it's just not my thing. My suggestion, don't give a damn, it's your life you can do whatever you want.
 
  Reply With Quote
Mokkesofie is offline Mokkesofie Post #5  October 10,2009, 1:40am
Mokkesofie's Avatar

Power Poster

Joined: Nov 2008

Posts: 8,463

See profile

In this day and age it's not at all embarrassing to have met on a dating site. My children and friends thought it was cool when I signed up.
 
  Reply With Quote
whatalife1683 is offline whatalife1683 Post #6  October 10,2009, 2:30am
whatalife1683's Avatar

Quick Study

Joined: Aug 2009

California

Posts: 99

See profile

If you are embarassed to say you met on EH, then tell them something else. I am in my mid 20s, but I do not feel like meeting people at the bar or parties. My last serious relationship was with someone who I met online. We were together for 6 and half years, and lived together for 6 years. We told people close to use where we met, but she did not tell some people how we really met. After a long while, everyone knew how we met. It brought a good side to online dating to both parties. My family and her family knew there are nice people on the internet, and they are as regular as the next person. By the way, I met my ex gf when she was 18 and I was 19. If I was to meet someone online again, I would not hesitate to tell people. If the girl was uncomfortable, I would go with she says. The thing with online dating is not being embarassed really. It is about the misconception of it consisting of perverts to hostile individuals. Let me ask you this then. Are you really embarassed, or you worried because people around you might have a negative view of online dating?
 
  Reply With Quote
Gr8Guyn2008 is online now Gr8Guyn2008 Post #7  October 10,2009, 5:14am
Gr8Guyn2008's Avatar

I'm crippled by the fear That I've fallen too far to love

Sage

Joined: Jan 2008

Orlando, FL

Posts: 18,862

See profile

First you may want to check out the book:

Romancing The Web: A Therapist's Guide To The Finer Points Of Online Dating

it addresses why you would want to use an online dating site and how to reply to this very question.

Then you may ask yourself and your friends just what type of people you usually find in bars?
 
  Reply With Quote
PR_Princess is offline PR_Princess Post #8  October 10,2009, 5:40am
PR_Princess's Avatar

Fly like an eagle...Let my spirit carry me

Enthusiast

Joined: Jun 2009

Posts: 685

See profile

If I find someone on EH I want to be their poster child for the next batch of EH commercials

The things in life we should be embarrassed about we often aren't. Never let yourself feel shy about being proactive in bringing happiness and love into your life. Maybe you'll start a hot new trend within your circle of friends. I hope you have fun and enjoy many of positive experiences.
 
  Reply With Quote
jayjay is offline jayjay Post #9  October 10,2009, 5:45am
jayjay's Avatar

...things seem to have gotten quiet around here.

Sage

Joined: Jun 2008

Brownsville, TX

Posts: 10,932

See profile

I think the question is....are you going to buy into a negative perception some people may have...or are you going to stand by your own perception?

When I dated a woman I met on eH for 3 months I told my parents how we met, and they're people who don't 'believe' in such things. I've told a number of guy friends that I'm on a couple dating sites and they think nothing of it.
 
  Reply With Quote
Sassafras54 is offline Sassafras54 — Advice Official Moderator Post #10  October 10,2009, 9:41am
Sassafras54's Avatar

Your Community Coordinator

Moderator

Joined: Oct 2009

San Pedro, CA

Posts: 8,283

See profile

It's possible your friends will be supportive, yes? And interested in your experience. You will like being able to talk to them about it.

If not, maybe you need some new friends!
 
  Reply With Quote
Reply
  • Page 1 of 3
  • 1
  • 2
  • 3


« Confused | Dating | Sex Question During Guided Communication »
Topic Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search

Posting Rules
You may not post new topics
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts
BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is On
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are Off

Looking for a Great Relationship?

Get started now. Fill out this form and take the questionnaire to receive your matches.

First Name:

I'm a:
seeking

Postal Code:

Country:

Email:

Confirm Email:

Password:


How did you hear about us?


Latest on our Dating Advice Discussion Boards

“It's important to understand the way a site works. Rigidly assuming / insisting that eH works likes all the others you're used to isn't utilizing the site functions to your best advantage. No.... ... ” –  Wiseman2

Join the “First contact on eHarmony, smile, questions, email?” discussion

“ If you have yet to meet, you don't know him or whether you two will form a connection. Connections formed over e-mail tend to be fantasies. You will see this echoed over and over by experienced ... ” –  shapeShifter79

Join the “How do i recoonect with him again?” discussion

“ Then it's a bit premature to worry about being friend-zoned. The first step is to go out on dates! What specific steps did you try? How many women did you ask out in person? Did you buy a ... ” –  shapeShifter79

Join the “For women to answer: How to avoid the friend zone” discussion

“ This is an old thread. She asked this in 2010. By now they are likely very exclusive or very over. ” –  shapeShifter79

Join the “is there a reason to ask if we're exclusive?” discussion

“ I'm sure he wouldn't get that. And I can't be sure that was the actual message. But it sems kind of likely to me.” –  boomer_gal

Join the “Why am I not successful?” discussion

“Hi eccemuliere and welcome to eHA.On an internet forum like eHA, you're going to get a wide variety of responses; some you'll like and some you won't. It's best to focus on the ones that speak to ... ” –  Sassafras54

Join the “Being blown off, or something else?” discussion

“ Although I have ignored my gut at times, in hindsight it's always been right, in terms of recognizing bad choices. QUOTE] But once we realize our past mistakes, we can use our reason to clue us ... ” –  eccemuliere

Join the “Is Your Gut Leading - or Misleading You?” discussion



All times are GMT -8. The time now is 8:06am.

Discussion Boards Archive

Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.4
Copyright ©2000 - 2012, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.
Search Engine Friendly URLs by vBSEO 3.6.0