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tjlpd is tired

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When you are older and dating you will have some. Those of us who are divorced have all been through some sort of emotional turmoil. How much do you put up with in a dating partner? Do you feel they must have it all together or are you willing to work with them on issues?
- October 9th, 2009, 06:23 pm
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I don’t accept any “baggage.”

I have none, she shouldn’t either.

“Emotional turmoil” associated with divorce ought to be resolved before dating, not foisted onto one’s partners.
- October 9th, 2009, 06:25 pm
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D_Lion wrote :
I don’t accept any “baggage.”

I have none, she shouldn’t either.

“Emotional turmoil” associated with divorce ought to be resolved before dating, not foisted onto one’s partners.
I agree and have decided again not to really date. However, the older you get I think the more baggage you have.

I think from reading your posts...you have baggage. You have a feeling that all women are after money.
- October 9th, 2009, 06:30 pm
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tjlpd wrote :
I agree and have decided again not to really date. However, the older you get I think the more baggage you have.

I suppose this is true … if you define “baggage” as unresolved emotional turmoil, I do not agree that older people have to have more.

They have more experiences, but they have had also the life experience to deal with their experiences in a healthy way and be prepared to meet new partners, without placing the issues from their past onto those new partners.
- October 9th, 2009, 06:40 pm
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I am not so sure it is a matter of people being attracted to people who are bad for them. I think it is more or less a issue of that when people get lonely they tend to use less judgment and can easily convince themselves that they are entering into the right relationship when in reality they are not.
This is a post from SteveX from another post. I guess this is what I am scared of. How much are we willing to accept as we do not want to be alone.
- October 9th, 2009, 06:46 pm
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Gr8Guyn2008 I'm in love and always will be ... All that was there will be there still

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D_Lion wrote :
I don’t accept any “baggage.”

I have none, she shouldn’t either.

“Emotional turmoil” associated with divorce ought to be resolved before dating, not foisted onto one’s partners.
+1
- October 9th, 2009, 07:06 pm
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I allow some time between relationships to get my head screwed on straight.

Previous one ended in June, meet the new interest for lunch Oct 3. We have a "real date" scheduled for next weekend.
- October 9th, 2009, 07:07 pm
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gr8guy wrote :
I allow some time between relationships to get my head screwed on straight.

Previous one ended in June, meet the new interest for lunch Oct 3. We have a "real date" scheduled for next weekend.
It is recommended (in a book) that you allow one week for each month of a relationship before you begin dating. If the relationship was a marriage that ended in divorce then it is adamantly recommended that you wait at least one year after the divorce is final (not when you separated, filed for divorce, etc. AFTER THE DIVORCE IS FINAL)
- October 9th, 2009, 07:15 pm
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D_Lion wrote :
I don’t accept any “baggage.”

I have none, she shouldn’t either.

Sounds harsh and too ideal

Baggage = values/ emotions/ feelings/ knowledge accumulated over the time. Mostly refer to the negative things that make oneself feel bad or drag him/her from moving forward.

How could I deny or throw away my bad things happened in my life so far? It is kidding myself.

I rather would learn a way to face with those baggages. Learn how badly I hurt, learn that how ugly I was, remembered the mistakes I made....And, in order to survive in a healthier way and a happy way, I have to forgive and forget.

I'm still trying to face with my ugliness every moment. And, learn how to push a fire extinguisher on it.

m..TOO SERIOUS man, librarybabe please come help these guys/ girls. We need your sweetness please. Thanks.
- October 9th, 2009, 07:19 pm
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It's not how much baggage you have, we all have it, but what you do with it. If you have had relationships, good or bad, children, young or grown, a career, any of those things can and will impact your attitudes and actions. You have to get all your priorities in order and proper proportion. So I would expect any man my age to have baggage, it is just how he handles it that makes a difference.
- October 9th, 2009, 07:30 pm
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