How much baggage do you put up with?


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lacedwithhope is offline lacedwithhope — Advice Member-Moderator Post #121  October 11,2009, 12:31pm
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gothustartus wrote :
Well there are so many varieties to choose from in Europe, Bitish stiff-upper-lipidness, French you-know-you-can't-resist-my-accent-unless-you're-a-lesbianess, Italian you-can't-dump-me-just-because-i-slept-with-your-sister-mother-and-grannyness...
Hmmm. That Italian thing explains a lot ...
 
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clearlyoblique is offline clearlyoblique Post #122  October 11,2009, 2:48pm
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DreamingOfAtlantis wrote :
If a person is looking for someone to heal themselves, then that's a problem. We're responsible for our own issues. But if we find someone that cares for us, and that could be a friend or a romantic interest, and they work with us, then, yes, people can heal each other -- as long as those who are injured are willing to work on their own healing. I've seen this happen many times, not just in my life, but in the lives of those I know in rehab programs or groups like AA and I saw it happening when I worked in treatment.
I see your point.
 
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DreamingOfAtlantis is offline DreamingOfAtlantis Post #123  October 11,2009, 3:02pm
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clearlyoblique wrote :
I see your point.
I think you may have been thinking in a more direct line, as in I cannot heal you. (I'm not saying you're broken, just an example!) But if you and I come together and both are willing to work, then we can help each other heal. It still comes down to the responsibility of each individual, though.

Does that mean we're both right?
 
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stevex is offline stevex Post #124  October 11,2009, 4:50pm
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I think with the right person I would be willing to put up with more stuff and try to work through more things. I don't think I can put an actual number on how much baggage I would accept or wouldn't accept, each person and situation is very different.
 
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D_Lion is online now D_Lion Post #125  October 11,2009, 4:55pm
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DreamingOfAtlantis wrote :
(I'm not saying you're broken, just an example!)

Did you check her feet?
 
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EMTZ is offline EMTZ Post #126  October 11,2009, 5:10pm
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stevex wrote :
I think with the right person I would be willing to put up with more stuff and try to work through more things. I don't think I can put an actual number on how much baggage I would accept or wouldn't accept, each person and situation is very different.
So the amount of baggage one has doesn't at all determine how "right" someone is for you?
 
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shoopthedoop is offline shoopthedoop Post #127  October 11,2009, 5:11pm
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tjlpd wrote :
Okay asking this again D lion and you can be generic but what do you do for a living...accountant, engineer???
What are you saying about those careers?

Are you bringing some baggage into this discussion caused by and accountant and/or engineer?
 
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clearlyoblique is offline clearlyoblique Post #128  October 11,2009, 5:17pm
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clearlyoblique wrote :
I see your point.
DreamingOfAtlantis wrote :
I think you may have been thinking in a more direct line, as in I cannot heal you. (I'm not saying you're broken, just an example!) But if you and I come together and both are willing to work, then we can help each other heal. It still comes down to the responsibility of each individual, though.

Does that mean we're both right?
Actually, I get where you are coming from and I think you are saying what a lot of people think but I disagree with you.
D_Lion wrote :
Did you check her feet?
No and he didn't step on them either.

They just healed on their own. Still hurt a little, though.
 
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D_Lion is online now D_Lion Post #129  October 11,2009, 5:35pm
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EMTZ wrote :
So the amount of baggage one has doesn't at all determine how "right" someone is for you?

You question his choice?

I think just about everyone will put up with more of a liability in a partner who also brings more attractive qualities.

This is nearly implicit, in that no one is perfect.
 
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tjlpd is offline tjlpd Post #130  October 11,2009, 5:43pm
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shoopthedoop wrote :
What are you saying about those careers?

Are you bringing some baggage into this discussion caused by and accountant and/or engineer?
discussed verbatim above...and I am a CPA so if I am insulting the group I am insulting myself.
 
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