How much baggage do you put up with?


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D_Lion is online now D_Lion Post #111  October 11,2009, 9:25am
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EMTZ wrote :
An intelligent woman should know the true, dictionary definition of a feminist. And if this intelligent woman is also honest, she will probably admit she will not accept that women should be granted fewer rights than men.

Sadly enough, many of them do express entitlement to special, extra rights, however, which I think does a lot of damage and generates a wedge and backlash.
 
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DreamingOfAtlantis is offline DreamingOfAtlantis Post #112  October 11,2009, 9:28am
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D_Lion wrote :
Sadly enough, many of them do express entitlement to special, extra rights, however, which I think does a lot of damage and generates a wedge and backlash.
There's also the extreme, men-bashing feminists with comments like, "A woman needs a man like a fish needs a bicycle," that also create the "wedge and backlash" effect. I understand the point: Each of us can be a happy and functional person without a partner, but such extreme statements only alienate men and increase the hatred and fear toward even the good feminists.
 
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clearlyoblique is offline clearlyoblique Post #113  October 11,2009, 9:40am
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D_Lion wrote :
Sadly enough, many of them do express entitlement to special, extra rights, however, which I think does a lot of damage and generates a wedge and backlash.
D, that's for mice.

I'd much rather have a man, thanks anyway.
 
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Allie_gator is offline Allie_gator Post #114  October 11,2009, 9:41am
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I don't know, I know everyone has baggage, but I've related baggage to things people can't let go. Not their personalities as feminist or Jocks. Perhaps I'm over simplifying it the definition. Can baggage be related to a persons personality? I'm sure it could be..I'm sure the amount of baggage a person carries taints how they may see things in their lives. Having baggage doesn't make a person necessarily not capable of having a relationship. I think what does that is how they handle their baggage with in that relationship as well as how their partner deals with it. I think some people sabotage their relationships, or as some have mentioned here, are like ragdolls looking to be mended.

Can that be considered baggage if people are looking to be healed by each other? On an off note, when I think of baggage I think of people at the airport with all their lugguge. I guess if I wanted to see the positive side of it, all that stuff in their bags can either be used for where they are going or it's just more junk to carry around just in case they need it.

I'm just adding my two cents. I really liked the thread.
Last edited by Allie_gator; October 11,2009 at 9:43am.
 
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Edmondo is offline Edmondo Post #115  October 11,2009, 9:48am
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Well you have to define baggage. I can put up with some quirkiness but I my self am quirky.

Here are my red flags that make me look closer.

Teenagers in the home. Some are ok but I have seen them run the house. One time I had to leave because the daughter was in a bad mood and no I didn’t cause it.

Judgmental. We were in the video store and they had broke back mountain on blu ray and I was looking at it. She said you like that? Two men can’t fall in love, that’s gross. Bad news there is gay people in my family and I love and accept them as they are.
 
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clearlyoblique is offline clearlyoblique Post #116  October 11,2009, 9:54am
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I don't think people heal each other.
 
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DreamingOfAtlantis is offline DreamingOfAtlantis Post #117  October 11,2009, 10:05am
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Allie_gator wrote :
...Can that be considered baggage if people are looking to be healed by each other?...
clearlyoblique wrote :
I don't think people heal each other.
If a person is looking for someone to heal themselves, then that's a problem. We're responsible for our own issues. But if we find someone that cares for us, and that could be a friend or a romantic interest, and they work with us, then, yes, people can heal each other -- as long as those who are injured are willing to work on their own healing. I've seen this happen many times, not just in my life, but in the lives of those I know in rehab programs or groups like AA and I saw it happening when I worked in treatment.
 
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chawks64 is offline chawks64 Post #118  October 11,2009, 11:52am
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I know I've said it a thousand times (hit the snooze button if you've heard it before), but I'm doing a very male-dominated job for a heavily male-dominated company. And I expect to be treated the same as the men, bad or good. I expect the same promotions for the same good work, and I expect the same punishment for the same mistakes. Honestly, I've been on this planet for 44 years and always assumed that's how things were, that I would be recognized for my skills, work ethic and intelligence. I've never gone looking for prejudice because it wasn't a reality for me.

But a couple of weeks ago I heard, for the 3rd time in 2 years, men loudly and unashamedly proclaiming their hatred of working with women, saying that the whole equal pay thing was a bunch of carp, and that they called our union a Brotherhood for a reason. These are men who work above me for approximately double my pay. Do you honestly think I'm going to get a fair shake from them when the next job opening comes up?

On the other hand, I've seen women come in and expect to be promoted just to fill in the EOE numbers. They think they should get the jobs ahead of men with more seniority and better skills just because they're women. That's not right either.

I think Feminism turns to Baggage when the stereotypes kick in on either side and anger gets in the way of logic. Despite what I have heard at work and the fact that I'm still being asked to correct the mistakes of the men promoted over me, I really like men. In fact, someday I'd like to have one I can take home with me.
 
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gothustartus is offline gothustartus Post #119  October 11,2009, 12:01pm
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funnyengineergal wrote :
So true!! I have found it easier to deal with the baggage of European-raised men as it resembles my background much better.
Well there are so many varieties to choose from in Europe, Bitish stiff-upper-lipidness, French you-know-you-can't-resist-my-accent-unless-you're-a-lesbianess, Italian you-can't-dump-me-just-because-i-slept-with-your-sister-mother-and-grannyness...
 
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chawks64 is offline chawks64 Post #120  October 11,2009, 12:05pm
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gothustartus wrote :
Well there are so many varieties to choose from in Europe, Bitish stiff-upper-lipidness, French you-know-you-can't-resist-my-accent-unless-you're-a-lesbianess, Italian you-can't-dump-me-just-because-i-slept-with-your-sister-mother-and-grannyness...
Um... I'm going with D: None of the above.

But then again, I usually get the German and Irish guys, so no worries.
 
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