Georgetheman is offline Georgetheman Post #1  October 1,2009, 7:16am
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I am a composer (person who writes music ) doing an undergrad degree. I will be collaborating with a dance choreographer for her senior project. (Can you sense the hotness already? ) From a brief meeting with all the dance choreographers, I am pretty strongly interested in one of them. Assuming I do end up collaborating with her, does anyone have any thoughts on how to go about this? Since the collaboration is a school thing, I'm wondering if it would be inappropriate to pursue her? If you think it's appropriate, any ideas how to go about it?

Thanks!
 
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BikerBeagle is offline BikerBeagle Post #2  October 1,2009, 8:06am
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thinks everyone should just ask themselves, WWBBD?

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I wouldn't 'pursue' her while you are working with her on a project together. Romantic relationships tend to bring a lot of additional stress and baggage into a working relationship that is better off without it.

If I were you, I'd hope that you don't get partnered with her ...then you can just ask her out.
 
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Georgetheman is offline Georgetheman Post #3  October 1,2009, 9:17am
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Thanks for the reply.

I wouldn't while we were working on the project... should have clarified that.

You don't think it would be a good way to get to know her? She is a near-total stranger to me.
 
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saulgoode is offline saulgoode Post #4  October 1,2009, 9:20am
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Just play it cool, and try not to think too much about her, or about what you're going to say.

You're a composer, right? Same thing. You think too hard on something, you'll muck it up.

Just flow.


- Saul
 
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Georgetheman is offline Georgetheman Post #5  October 1,2009, 9:57am
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saulgoode wrote :
You're a composer, right? Same thing. You think too hard on something, you'll muck it up.
Ha ha! So true!

See, I'm a moron. My first line of thinking was: I like this girl, so I'm going to request to collaborate with her. But the performance is in March, so this is a long process. Now I'm afraid that if I work with her that long, we'll become just friends. I could prevent this by sending signals early on and seeing if she responds--but gaaah, that be inappropriate if we're collaborating!
 
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Gr8Guyn2008 is offline Gr8Guyn2008 Post #6  October 1,2009, 10:07am
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BikerBeagle wrote :
I wouldn't 'pursue' her while you are working with her on a project together. Romantic relationships tend to bring a lot of additional stress and baggage into a working relationship that is better off without it.

If I were you, I'd hope that you don't get partnered with her ...then you can just ask her out.
I agree with this.
 
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BikerBeagle is offline BikerBeagle Post #7  October 1,2009, 10:47am
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Georgetheman wrote :
My first line of thinking was: I like this girl, so I'm going to request to collaborate with her. But the performance is in March, so this is a long process. Now I'm afraid that if I work with her that long, we'll become just friends. I could prevent this by sending signals early on and seeing if she responds--but gaaah, that be inappropriate if we're collaborating!
My first line of thinking is that she won't want to get 'involved' with someone she's collaborating with on a project, so she'll friend-zone you right away ...then you will be stuck working with someone you are attracted to, but isn't attracted to you.

Sure, collaborating on a project together is a good way to get to know her ...it's also, more often than not, the fast lane to the friend-zone.

Everyone is a stranger until you walk up and say, "hi".
 
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richey is online now richey Post #8  October 2,2009, 6:04am
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Ya, don't request her as a collaboration partner. Let things be.

I think it would be okay to plant the seed during this project ~ but agree with the rest that the focus should remain the project and don't jeopardize that. But doing it on the side away from "project time" and in a light fashion so it doens't become a project distraction i think is a good move (whether or not she becomes your collaborative partner or not).

Create the interest during the project. Plant the seed you find her attractive. Let her see yer making some effort to notice and get to know her. Wet that appetite in her. Then when it's over ~ it's showtime

Good luck on the project (I'm a musician/audio engineer myself).

Richey
 
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Georgetheman is offline Georgetheman Post #9  October 2,2009, 10:32am
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Thanks for the advice guys.

Thank God, I was not paired with her. I've been paired with a choreographer who I'm NOT interested in and who seems to be pretty sharp intellectually--so it should be really good.

Now I have to consider how to go about this... I'll probably try to get choreographers/musicians together so I can see her again in a group setting. I feel a little weird showing one-on-one interest when I've only spent an hour of my entire life in her presence.

Thanks Richey, I'm pretty excited about this project! That's cool you're an audio engineer. I've done quite a bit of recording and mixing (mostly in Cubase), and my brother is going in for music recording.
 
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