How can one expand their dating pool?


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eHA_Admin_Lori is offline eHA_Admin_Lori — Advice Official Moderator Post #1  September 21,2009, 9:42am
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What kind of things do you think you could do to expand your dating pool?

Many of you are trying online dating, which is one great way to do so, but what else?

Loosening preferences? Working on yourself?
 
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jayjay is offline jayjay Post #2  September 21,2009, 9:46am
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...things seem to have gotten quiet around here.

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Moving to a new city inadvertently expanded the size of my dating pool.

If we're talking online dating I'd say that expanding one's distance criteria might open up the number of possible matches the most, though trying to date someone at a larger distance has its own problems.
 
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CapnCrunch23 is offline CapnCrunch23 Post #3  September 21,2009, 10:19am

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For online dating: Yes, loosing your preferences or criteria will help expand the pool. For the longest time I wouldn't date anyone under a certain height. Changing that set criteria, Opened up a few more pages of potential matches.

IRL- With winter just around the corner.I was tired of sitting around waiting for spring, So I recently joined a co-ed volleyball team and a bowling league. I know I've expanded my own dating pool in joining these group activities
Last edited by CaptCrunch23; September 21,2009 at 10:21am. Reason: never going to win a spelling bee
 
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DancingFool is online now DancingFool Post #4  September 21,2009, 10:35am
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Online - being less rigid and less instantly judgemental of people will expand your horizons quite a bit.

In real life - any type of co-ed activities - sports, arts, interest groups, clubs, charities, etc. Pretty much anything that will expand your social circle goes.
 
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D_Lion is offline D_Lion Post #5  September 21,2009, 1:40pm
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The difficult issue with being more open-minded, is finding that I had less in common, and less successful partnerships, if I relaxed my criteria.

Over time, I became less willing to go outside my comfort zone; this results in fewer options, but I would rather wait longer than have unsuitable partners - I think I wasted more time that way than I would have spent waiting.
 
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kahappy is offline kahappy Post #6  September 21,2009, 3:01pm
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knows her glass is half full. :)

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Try completely different things and put yourself in new locations. It doesn't mean you have to move like jayjay, but accept invitations to things you normally wouldn't attend. For example, I just bought a new car last month and the large dealership I bought it from is hosting an informational gathering in a few weeks for those who have recently bought new cars at this dealership. Normally I would never go to something like that, but I'm seriously considering attending it...you never know.
 
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Jacquiem is offline Jacquiem Post #7  September 21,2009, 3:37pm
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I think if you've spent a lot of time determining what's important to you in a mate, loosening those criteria to expand your dating pool defeats the purpose of having the creiteria in the first place. You might get more dates, but will they be the quality dates you ultimately want? I don't think so...

Moving has been a thought for me, and would probably work, too. People tell me all the time that I'd just do better in the South. I can see myself a Southern Belle... Alas, I'm lazy, and relocating just to get myself a man...not the best reason to pick up and move, at least not for me. Because what if I run into the same dating issues there that I do here? What do I do then, move again? Nah...

Take classes in your area; learn to dance, a new hobby; to cook a new and exotic dish. Take museum tours and go to lectures that interest you. Try Meetup.com - look for a group that you might be interested to do some things with - hiking, movies, traveling, clubbing. Make new friends that way.

And if none of that works, there's always voodoo...
 
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jayjay is offline jayjay Post #8  September 21,2009, 4:00pm
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...things seem to have gotten quiet around here.

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After reading this thread I've decided to expand my distance criteria....at least temporarily. I was getting almost no matches in my area....so I'll give this at least a brief try.
 
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Jacquiem is offline Jacquiem Post #9  September 21,2009, 4:13pm
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Expand all the way to DC, jayjay, DC!!!
 
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Jacquiem is offline Jacquiem Post #10  September 21,2009, 4:14pm
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Oh wait, I'm not receiving matches anymore. Nevermind.
 
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