What makes a man! Chivalry is not dead!


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Ladyjuju is offline Ladyjuju Post #1  September 13,2009, 3:57pm
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Ok, going to get probably into some trouble again, but whay the hay!
I have noticed on these boards that when the subject comes up about who pays for what and when, it gets a little much, at least for me to understand.
I come from a family of 4 sisters and 1 brother. My brother died 5 years ago, but he was the eldest in our family and the only boy. He was so protective of his sisters, especially me and my twin sister, since we were 15 years younger than him. When he married, he was very well to do and the woman he married was not liked too much by our family. However, my brother would always say, " What Mary wants, Mary gets!". He was so generous and thoughtful and respected all women so much, ( thanks to my parents for instilling in him all through the years he grew up) to be kind and gentle to women and to respect them and protect them!...........Fast forward 19 years and here I am with a 19 year old son, who worships the ground his girlfriend walks on. She does not work, as she is still in school, as is my son, but my son has 2 part time jobs and spends most of his money on gas and maintenance for his car to chauffeur her around everywhere. He buys her gifts, takes her out for dinner, and even buys her clothes! And I think this is just great! I am so proud of my son, I brought him up on my own since he was 1 1/2 years old, without any support from his father. I too always told him from a very early age, that "girls come first" and you have to be nice and gentle with girls, and respect them and protect them! I guess it worked! It is so nice to see that he doesn't keep a spreadsheet of what he paid for and what she didn't!!
OMG, what I have read on the boards lately, calling women everything from "gold diggers to comparing them to welfare cases" makes me want to throw up! Come on, do you honestly believe that an attitude like that is going to get you a date? I truly believe that a "real" man is one who takes responsibility and if initiated a date, is totally responsible for all costs thereof! If he continues to want to pursue this relationship, then he is also responsible for the costs involved. It will be a frosty day in Haiti before I pay for a dinner date with any so called "man", as in my book, is not man if he acts like a mouse! I think we need more men like my brother and my son in this world!..I know they are out there........just gotta find them!
 
 
jayjay is offline jayjay Post #2  September 13,2009, 4:03pm
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...things seem to have gotten quiet around here.

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Two things that seems to be confounded in your post are 'respect'....and 'giving a woman everything she wants'. I submit that giving someone everything they want is neither good for them nor is it respectful. And, I think it usually leads to the person on the receiving end actually losing respect for the giving person.
 
 
Nanette is offline Nanette Post #3  September 13,2009, 4:07pm
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jayjay wrote :
And, I think it usually leads to the person on the receiving end actually losing respect for the giving person.
this can be true if the giving guy is a wimp. if hes a guy that is focused on my happiness and giving out of that it is a huge and i mean huge turn on and it makes me want to give back to him. not flowers and thank you cards with sappy sayings but real appreciation and yes, the utmost respect.
 
 
Ladyjuju is offline Ladyjuju Post #4  September 13,2009, 4:15pm
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jayjay wrote :
Two things that seems to be confounded in your post are 'respect'....and 'giving a woman everything she wants'. I submit that giving someone everything they want is neither good for them nor is it respectful. And, I think it usually leads to the person on the receiving end actually losing respect for the giving person.

Hey JayJay, my brother was probably the most well respected, good looking, gentleman on the planet until his accident 5 years ago! No one lost respect for him, he was truly what women would call the ultimate gentleman! Kind, gentle, generous, respecting and NO ONE ever lost respect for him. Maybe read between the lines and who knows what that can bring!
By the way, thanks for getting rid of David Hasselhoare!! Yuck! you look much better.........if that is actually you?
 
 
jayjay is offline jayjay Post #5  September 13,2009, 4:20pm
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...things seem to have gotten quiet around here.

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Ladyjuju wrote :
By the way, thanks for getting rid of David Hasselhoare!!
Yeah....after a while I too started to get creeped out by that Hoff photo. I thought it was kind of a funny choice to have up for a while though.
 
 
BuzWeaver is offline BuzWeaver Post #6  September 13,2009, 4:25pm
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Without getting into the whole 'Nice Guy' thing, to me its just a matter of common courtesy. I don't think one has to go out of their way to make a point of acknowledging someone, but just common courtesy seems to be a realistic approach.
 
 
Ladyjuju is offline Ladyjuju Post #7  September 13,2009, 4:29pm
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OK, who gave me the one star! The frog seems to be missing tonight, as he usually does give me the lonely single star...........but perhaps he took my advice to go to the dermatologist to get those nasty warts removed!
Last edited by Ladyjuju; September 13,2009 at 4:32pm.
 
 
Ladyjuju is offline Ladyjuju Post #8  September 13,2009, 4:30pm
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jayjay wrote :
Yeah....after a while I too started to get creeped out by that Hoff photo. I thought it was kind of a funny choice to have up for a while though.
You look a million times better than him!!
 
 
jayjay is offline jayjay Post #9  September 13,2009, 4:33pm
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...things seem to have gotten quiet around here.

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I'll turn the topic around for a minute. While I very much value a woman who is very giving and does a lot for me....however, while this may generate positive feelings in me for her, I don't think one of them is respect. I 'respect' a woman who is not only giving but who is also able to tell me 'no' when need be.
 
 
Nanette is offline Nanette Post #10  September 13,2009, 4:45pm
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okay i'll say it:

what applies to men doesnt apply to women. she shouldnt be giving in the same way a man does to a woman. her giving to him should be in the form of appreciation and respect. sure she can do romantic stuff for him when he does for her but i wouldnt reciprocate exactly. id bake him cookies, make him dinner or something like that.

and men love it when women say no to them. most women dont get this at all. they say yes okay are understanding and accommodating and the guy disrespects them. they wonder why.
 
 
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