OK, I just don't get it...

I may have posted about this before, so forgive me if I'm being a broken record.

I was matched with a guy on eH about a year ago. He seemed ideal -- nice, clean-cut, educated, from a nice family, owns his own business, etc. I did some checking around and he is legit in all those respects. We got along great by email and talked on the phone a few times. Then we didn't talk for a few months. We are on each other's Facebook page and now he often IMs me on there. Bugs me constantly about coming to visit him but never offers to come here or meet halfway. The other weird thing is he never calls. He is not married or anything like that, so that isn't the reason. I've made comments before about the lack of phone calls and always say something like, "We should talk on the phone soon" or "Let's talk on the phone this weekend." Did so a week or two ago and he didn't call even though he agreed we should talk on the phone soon.

So tonight he IMs me and is continuing to bug me about coming out for a visit. Asks half-jokingly/half-seriously if I've bought my ticket yet, when am I coming for a visit, etc. I got a little smarty-pants with him and said "So, when are you going to call me?" He finally did. Didn't have much to say and only stayed on for a couple of minutes because he was getting ready to go to bed (he is an hour ahead of me). I just don't know what to think of all this. Why are so many guys so weird about talking on the phone? And if this guy is so interested in me coming for a visit, why doesn't he call me? I don't expect long, in-depth conversations, but a phone call every now and then to shoot the breeze would be nice. Why does every conversation have to be online? Why the hang-up (pun not intended) about phone conversations?

First of all, props to legend for teaching jr. high! You are a brave woman! :-)

I think bigfincat may be right, that he doesn't actually meet the women he flirts with online.

However, it's really hard to say for sure. It's true that some people (men and women) are really bad on the phone. But Wonderwoman is right, if there is going to be a long-distance thing, then he needs to get good on the phone.

Have you seen a photo of him? If not it's possible he could have something physical he's embarrassed about-- weight, height, a handicap, who knows?

We could sit here and talk all day about all the possible reasons he is acting this way, but the bottom line is that he is not really interested in meeting you or in getting to know you better. If he were, he would make it happen.

I'd drop him like a hot potato.

Do not, under any circumstances, buy a ticket to go visit him! He is NOT that into you. He is probably talking to two dozen women online, and telling them all the same lines.