Is there a point that you settle?

I'm 37. I want to be a mother. I'm re-evaluating. Tick-tock.

Here's a short interesting quote from a woman on another forum that was talking about this stuff.

"I find that if I put all sorts of restrictions on what I want, then what I get isn't what I wanted to begin with."

Very profound imo.

I remember having this same question myself at one time and I get what you are saying. However I also learned to see things a different way. When one "settles" one is giving up what is most important to them in order to obtain something they want more. So Say we choose to settle so that we can have the child we always wanted.... The child comes along and we are thrilled with the child but the person we "settled" for is there as well... and once the goal of the child is obtained are we still going to be able to live with what we settled for? Will the relationship work or fail? I'm guessing more times than not in this situation it will fail... Will that be fair to you? The person you settled for? Or for your child?

In this day of advanced medical science a woman is capable of having a child without the requirement of intimacy with a male. There are other options out there as well such as adoption. Wouldn't it make more sense even though it doesn't follow a "traditional" pattern to explore those options, fulfill your goal of being a mother and continue to take your time, unpressurred, to develope a loving lasting relationship with another person that includes you and your child without having to "settle"?
Obviously in the end it is your choice but I do hope you will find a way to fulfill all your desires without giving up the things that are most important to you. You are worth too much to settle for less. =0) Best wishes!

I have certain non-negotiables:

- no self-destructive behavior (addictions, debt, depression etc.)
- affectionate/caring
- reasonably intelligent/smart
- humility and non-materialism (liking money is OK but the greed for money or the need to show off is NOT)
- average looks
- not substantially overweight (few extra lbs is OK if they generally maintain an active lifestyle)
- wants a family

I am still wondering why these basic characteristics are so incredibly difficult to find.