straight_up is offline straight_up Post #1  August 28,2009, 6:04pm
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So every time I ask my friends “why don’t guys pay attention to me?” they always seem to give me the typical “try presenting your self more confidently”, etc. I will admit that in high school I was not a social butterfly at all. In fact I was usually day dreaming about riding my horses then paying attention in class. Regardless, now that I am in college and have grown out of the “horse girl” phase, I have changed quite a bit. I have come to accept my more full figured curvy body then admiring the majority of my friends petite bodies. Sure I wouldn’t mind losing a few pounds but I actually like me the way I am! I like the fact that I don’t mind getting dessert while my other friends who are obsessed with their weight are always dieting. But I do maintain a more healthy life style then previously, by staying active and not taking seconds at supper, etc. Aside from the physical acceptance I have also become much more confident in who I am and what I believe/where I stand.

So it floors me when my friends are still giving me the same story of being more confident in myself. I still am not a social butterfly and tend to be more shy when meeting new people. I am not that great at small talk either. I have put much more effort into it (making eye contact, smiling, talking to someone first, etc.) but have not really seen any results. I feel so much more confident in myself but still don’t feel like guys notice me. Could they be taking notice and I’m just too blonde to notice?

Any advice/tips?
 
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MelinCali is offline MelinCali Post #2  September 1,2009, 1:40pm
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Welcome to the boards straight_up and congratulations on your great attitude for accepting yourself as is. It's great that you have more confidence now.

Since you are in college, you are in a great environment to meet people. Perhaps a great way to get noticed would be for you to show your smile and be seen having fun. Become involved in campus clubs/groups and just meet people in general. That will help you become just a little bit more of a social butterfly in general and you never know who you'll meet when you are trying so hard to find someone.
 
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Ms666 is offline Ms666 Post #3  September 1,2009, 2:08pm
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If you have had the same friends since high school, it could be that they still see you as you were back then. They don't see your new found confidence and see the same old shy girl. I agree you should use your college experience to make some new friends!

Also, I bet the guys ARE taking notice of you if you are happy with yourself and are making a effort to be open to eye contact and etc.

I'll share with you my trick for when I walk into a social situation where I don't know many people. I tell myself I already own the room and all those people are lucky to get to share it with me! If they're really lucky, they get to talk to me!
(The imagining everybody in their underwear thing works sometimes too, just be careful not too stare too long at some hunk 'cause you're imagining him in his Calvins! Did that once and almost got into with a jealous gf )
 
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boccabum is offline boccabum Post #4  September 1,2009, 2:11pm
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The guys are noticing. You're just not noticing THEM.
 
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