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I almost give a mulligan the first time around, regardless of the circumstance, because I know how harrowing it can be to start off a potentially new relationship on the wrong foot. But tardiness is a big pet peeve of mine. I don't accept the conventional "women take longer to get ready" excuse -- just start getting ready sooner. Tardiness is rude and inconsiderate. To take that to the next level, it can sometimes be a symptom of someone with control issues.

I don't understand people on online dating sites -- such as the eHarmony first questions -- who mention their frequent tardiness almost as a badge of honor. Why not do something about it?
- August 27th, 2009, 05:31 pm
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My next husband is 5 years late!

How rude is that? I might just tell him that it's not acceptable when I finally meet him.
- August 27th, 2009, 05:46 pm
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Exactly what wonderwomen said. To each his/her own and to own his/her each. If you understand that then your doing better then me.
- August 27th, 2009, 06:08 pm
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When I was in my 20s, I used to be 30-60 minutes late when meeting friends. They would get soooooooooo mad. And 20-30 minutes late on dates. Yes, I was a rude little one!

Now in my 30s, I am the one who's on time ... and my dates and friends are between 20-60 minutes late. Now they are the rude ones!
- August 27th, 2009, 06:37 pm
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trixie1868 wrote :
My next husband is 5 years late!

How rude is that? I might just tell him that it's not acceptable when I finally meet him.
But is he late....or are you?
- August 27th, 2009, 06:48 pm
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I do agree that for me it depends on the situation. If I am somewhere that has entertainment in the form of people or a game (ex. a bar, beach, etc) I will be more forgiving of lateness IF she calls & keeps me updated on her ETA.

If it is something that we are doing that has a time constraint then I will be far less pleased. Also, if all that I have to do is twittle my thumbs then I no likey.
- August 27th, 2009, 06:56 pm
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If someone is 10 or 15 minutes late once in a while I can live with that because things happen. I expect a call though unless someone is in a situation where they really can't call. If this becomes a chronic problem then I would not be happy because I would figure that person did not respect my time. I am chronically early which I know also drives some people crazy - but I don't start marking the time until the agreed upon meeting time has passed.
- August 27th, 2009, 07:03 pm
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Emergencies and traffic problems are facts of life, so I can roll with those. But a phone call to report the holdup is expected and appreciated.

But chronic tardiness is just arrogance, for IMO the late person is showing that his/her time is more valuable and important than the time of other people waiting and, I have zero tolerance for it.
- August 27th, 2009, 07:06 pm
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trixie1868 wrote :
My next husband is 5 years late!

How rude is that? I might just tell him that it's not acceptable when I finally meet him.


Too Cute!
- August 27th, 2009, 07:26 pm
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wordwoman wrote :
Emergencies and traffic problems are facts of life, so I can roll with those. But a phone call to report the holdup is expected and appreciated.

But chronic tardiness is just arrogance, for IMO the late person is showing that his/her time is more valuable and important than the time of other people waiting and, I have zero tolerance for it.
Agreed. Chronic tardiness is an indication of my time is more important than yours. Also a classic passive/aggressive behavior.

But when choosing primary care physicians... 45 mins. late is perfect!

Why?

Because I have found that the later the doctor run the more time he/she spends with each patient and if the doc runs on time, once your ten minutes is up, you're out! Sometimes medical concerns cannot be summed up in 10 minutes and while waiting I know that the person he/she is taking longer with will take as long as needed with me. My primary care physicians is always apologizing for being late and I tell him "Doc, that's one of the reasons why I picked up". He has been thorough and takes the time to get everything right. Sometimes if it is a quick appointment he just sits down and asks how things are going, etc. like he genuinely care about me and wants to know how life is going. He also takes my blood pressure himself rather than pawn it off an assistant.

So, outside of my doctor, 45 minutes consistently late is out of the question. I used to date this guy who would arrive about ten minutes early and sit in his truck and count down the minutes so he was exactly on time to the minute. He was a sweetie but ultimately not my type. I still remember him fondly.
- August 27th, 2009, 07:27 pm
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