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tjlpd tjlpd is offline
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fudgesmom wrote :
Maybe it's not you she is feeling 'rushed' by, but a relationship that WAS rushed and went sour. Women want to develop a sense of trust & emotional committment before they risk intimacy.

Develop the emotional intimacy and trust first. And trust your gut instincts. It takes time to get to know someone, and there are many dimensions to a person. Enjoy each day.
+1
- August 27th, 2009, 10:15 am
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Ladyjuju Ladyjuju is offline
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TroyL65 wrote :
OK so i just met this wonderful lady and she said she wants to get to know me more but take it slow and let things happen naturally? Can anyone clarify what that means by meaning just hanging out and getting to know each other or what?

It means "just that"...and why not! Touche for her! You just said she is a "wonderful lady"....so what else can you ask for at this point in time?
You don't need clarification, you know exactly what she means! The one eyed lizard needs to stay buried in the sand, until she says so!
- August 27th, 2009, 07:02 pm
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OverAnalyzer OverAnalyzer is offline
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TroyL65 wrote :
OK so i just met this wonderful lady and she said she wants to get to know me more but take it slow and let things happen naturally? Can anyone clarify what that means by meaning just hanging out and getting to know each other or what?
Being female, it also means that she really likes you and doesn't want to blow it, so she wants to be cautious and make sure you really like her.
- August 27th, 2009, 07:14 pm
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keepitreal43 keepitreal43 is offline
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Ok, here it goes....

From a female, I've said that and it means, not jumping into a sexual relationship right away. Taking things slow means dating and romancing, and getting to know eachother. I think jumping into a sexual relationship right away sometimes changes the direction of a relationship.... nothing against sex, sometimes it is what it is....and it can be very good, but sometimes nothing else is there.... and it becomes a sexualship versus a relationship

Hope that clarifies things a bit.... **ducking from all the things being thrown at me****
- August 27th, 2009, 07:23 pm
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tenderheart105 tenderheart105 is offline
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yes, I agree that some women really do need to feel a connection with someone to be attracted to them. Myself included. I can say that I recognize that many men are attractive, but I do not feel attracted to them unless I know something about their character. This may be the reason why she wants to take things slow. She is the only one who knows why she said it It may not be a bad idea to clarify this with her. I don't think there is any harm in asking her what she means.
- August 27th, 2009, 07:42 pm
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6dle899 wrote :
I also agree with neardc, I think physical attraction may need a bit of time to blossom with a female of quality, as for them the qualities of goodness, kindness, decency, intelligence and sensitivity, and sincereness, once identified, may then draw them to you romantically and sensually, and then they may fall for you, and as a consequence, then make intimacy a foregone conclusion.

Physical attraction alone is never enough with good women like that.

I would invest in a few dates and see where this leads.

Note: Disregard all of this and move on immediately, if you are a player, both for their sake and yours...
You got it just right. Most of the men I've been out with want to marry me within the first few months or try the "I Love You" as perhaps a means of manipulation to get me to say it back when I don't feel it. I go slow and if he starts forcing me beyond my comfort level, I'll tell him I've uncomfortable and if he still persists, its over. I need to assess many of the things listed above and those don't just happen in a couple of dates. And I want him to know me more in depth also.
- August 27th, 2009, 07:59 pm
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dietpepsi dietpepsi is offline
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I think you have to gauge what her current mindset it. You cannot determine her level of interest based on that statement alone.
It really depends on where the woman is at with her biological clock and dating approach.

I've said the exact same thing to men I was interested in from the beginning as well men that I was lukewarm about (could still later develop interest and passion). But I've never said it to guys that I know, for sure, that I will never get involved with. I would never offer to see a guy again, if I wrote him off right off the bat. In the past when I was a spring chicken, and the guy was super persistent I might see him again even if I weren't interested. Now that I'm an old fart, I would just politely say no.
- August 27th, 2009, 09:17 pm
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Taking it slow is the best thing to do in a relationship. Because if you rush a relationship....it would end in a good way or a bad way depends on the outcome. For example, I was rushed into a relationship and I didn't know him very well and he started to treat me differently and I couldn't tell if he was playing with me or not and unforturnatley I ended the relationship because the way he was treating me. Rushing a relationship can scare the other person away. By taking it slow the lady wants to know you and at the same time she want you to know her and a relationship could blossom just by hanging out, getting to know each other, working out within the relationship and taking it slow.
- August 27th, 2009, 10:30 pm
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Just as it could be a good idea to take the physical side of a relationship slow....so too it could be a good idea to take the emotional side of it slow as well.

If a woman is feeling rushed I'd go along with that. We could see each other once every one or two weeks. There's no rush to jump into emotional intimacy either and we can use our time to date other people as well.
- August 27th, 2009, 10:56 pm
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Nanette wrote :
i'm surprised that no one mentioned (that i saw) that she may be very attracted to you and not want to jump in the sack right away, which may be what she feels like doing.
That did occur to me, i had a date once with a woman who blew me off for a second date because she was too attracted, didn't trust it and felt too uncomfortable being around me.

Ok, it made me feel damn good for a few weeks, but still.
- August 27th, 2009, 10:57 pm
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