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Thisonegoesto11 Thisonegoesto11 is offline
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I am sure this topic has come up before, but I am new to the boards and wanted to ask how long you should wait to talk about religious beliefs? I grew up is a very religious family and have some strong opinions on organized religion (most of them on the negative side). I am a spiritual person, but do not belong to a church. I cannot see myself getting serious with someone who is heavily involved in a church. Religion is such a personal subject, I just wanted advise on when to bring up the subject.
- August 25th, 2009, 02:46 pm
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Mention in your profile that you're not interested in any bible thumpers. That should weed them out.
- August 25th, 2009, 03:04 pm
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it has- but that's ok.

i put my religious beliefs right up front in my profile. they do not comprise the entirety of the profile but they do get noticed there. i find that weeds out people that feel squeamish around me.

i also scan matched profiles for a few things- religious compatibility being one of those things.

good luck!
- August 25th, 2009, 03:08 pm
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churumbeque churumbeque is offline
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notyet wrote :
it has- but that's ok.

i put my religious beliefs right up front in my profile. they do not comprise the entirety of the profile but they do get noticed there. i find that weeds out people that feel squeamish around me.

i also scan matched profiles for a few things- religious compatibility being one of those things.

good luck!
I might just have to start going to church if there's hot cowboys like you there.
- August 25th, 2009, 03:10 pm
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This is a bit of a sticky subject only because even if you are religious or just spiritual and mention it in the profile...it is purely subjective. I consider myself moderate but someone else might find me too conservative or not religious enough.
I like this question because I have toned down my own profile but now I am thinking I should give specific examples of what I mean by moderate at the end of the profile. Hmmm...something to think about
- August 25th, 2009, 03:15 pm
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churumbeque wrote :
I might just have to start going to church if there's hot cowboys like you there.
;-)

mwah!

<):-X
- August 25th, 2009, 05:09 pm
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Thisonegoesto11 wrote :
I am sure this topic has come up before, but I am new to the boards and wanted to ask how long you should wait to talk about religious beliefs? I grew up is a very religious family and have some strong opinions on organized religion (most of them on the negative side). I am a spiritual person, but do not belong to a church. I cannot see myself getting serious with someone who is heavily involved in a church. Religion is such a personal subject, I just wanted advise on when to bring up the subject.
People who are heavily involved in their religion usually aren't too interested in folks who select "spiritual but not religious" on their profiles, thus if you have selected this option, many of them will close you before you have to say anything about your beliefs about organized religion.

In addition, the heavily involved types generally make mention of their church-going ways somewhere in their own profiles, since most are searching for someone of similiar interest level, thus you'll have a chance to close them out without, again, having to say anything about your beliefs.

In my experience, one of these two options usually does the trick when it comes to narrowing the field on religion and spirtuality.

Of course, if these two safeguards don't work and you find yourself "talking" with someone who is totally into organized religion, you should speak up during one of the early discussions and put this topic on the table.
- August 25th, 2009, 05:09 pm
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I have said this before, but it is still true. It depends a lot on your age and whether you are planning on starting a family. I am fairly religious, but since my kids are all raised there wouldn't be any conflicts on that issue. As long as your partner does not actively dispute your beliefs and practices go for it.
- August 25th, 2009, 05:40 pm
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I would agree that being honest and upfront about your religious beliefs immediately, in your profile is best.

I would also add that you avoid using terms like "bible thumpers" or "holy rollers" to describe religious people you're not interested in, or "Godless heathens" or "carnal" for people who are not as religious as you who you are not interested in. People's faith is a serious subject, and just because you don't agree with what they believe, you don't have to be negative about it. It's a preference just like everything else.
- August 25th, 2009, 06:07 pm
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Honestgetsdishonest Honestgetsdishonest is offline
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Thisonegoesto11 wrote :
I am sure this topic has come up before, but I am new to the boards and wanted to ask how long you should wait to talk about religious beliefs? I grew up is a very religious family and have some strong opinions on organized religion (most of them on the negative side). I am a spiritual person, but do not belong to a church. I cannot see myself getting serious with someone who is heavily involved in a church. Religion is such a personal subject, I just wanted advise on when to bring up the subject.

Ask the guy about his faith as soon as possible. This is a HUGE closer for me. If a woman is agnostic, I would not date her. Same, women who are agnostic SAY IT ON THEIR PROFILE, men who are Christian say so on theirs.

So, if it is a big issue for you as it is for me, talk about it right away.

Make it clear in your profile, VERY CLEAR.
- August 25th, 2009, 06:22 pm
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