Asking about religion.


Reply
  • Page 1 of 2
  • 1
  • 2
 
Topic Tools Search this Thread
Thisonegoesto11 is offline Thisonegoesto11 Post #1  August 25,2009, 1:46pm
Thisonegoesto…'s Avatar

Newbie

Joined: Aug 2009

Posts: 4

See profile

I am sure this topic has come up before, but I am new to the boards and wanted to ask how long you should wait to talk about religious beliefs? I grew up is a very religious family and have some strong opinions on organized religion (most of them on the negative side). I am a spiritual person, but do not belong to a church. I cannot see myself getting serious with someone who is heavily involved in a church. Religion is such a personal subject, I just wanted advise on when to bring up the subject.
 
  Reply With Quote
tweet37 is offline tweet37 Post #2  August 25,2009, 2:04pm
tweet37's Avatar

has all the tools and can........satisfy

Power Poster

Joined: Sep 2008

New Jersey

Posts: 7,318

See profile

Mention in your profile that you're not interested in any bible thumpers. That should weed them out.
 
  Reply With Quote
notyet is offline notyet Post #3  August 25,2009, 2:08pm
notyet's Avatar

Power Poster

Joined: Nov 2008

Posts: 5,237

See profile

it has- but that's ok.

i put my religious beliefs right up front in my profile. they do not comprise the entirety of the profile but they do get noticed there. i find that weeds out people that feel squeamish around me.

i also scan matched profiles for a few things- religious compatibility being one of those things.

good luck!
 
  Reply With Quote
churumbeque is offline churumbeque Post #4  August 25,2009, 2:10pm
churumbeque's Avatar

Pacesetter

Joined: Dec 2008

Midwest

Posts: 388

See profile

notyet wrote :
it has- but that's ok.

i put my religious beliefs right up front in my profile. they do not comprise the entirety of the profile but they do get noticed there. i find that weeds out people that feel squeamish around me.

i also scan matched profiles for a few things- religious compatibility being one of those things.

good luck!
I might just have to start going to church if there's hot cowboys like you there.
 
  Reply With Quote
PR_Princess is offline PR_Princess Post #5  August 25,2009, 2:15pm
PR_Princess's Avatar

Fly like an eagle...Let my spirit carry me

Enthusiast

Joined: Jun 2009

Posts: 685

See profile

This is a bit of a sticky subject only because even if you are religious or just spiritual and mention it in the profile...it is purely subjective. I consider myself moderate but someone else might find me too conservative or not religious enough.
I like this question because I have toned down my own profile but now I am thinking I should give specific examples of what I mean by moderate at the end of the profile. Hmmm...something to think about
 
  Reply With Quote
notyet is offline notyet Post #6  August 25,2009, 4:09pm
notyet's Avatar

Power Poster

Joined: Nov 2008

Posts: 5,237

See profile

churumbeque wrote :
I might just have to start going to church if there's hot cowboys like you there.
;-)

mwah!
 
  Reply With Quote
wordwoman is offline wordwoman Post #7  August 25,2009, 4:09pm
wordwoman's Avatar

is in contemplation

Quick Study

Joined: Mar 2009

Pacific Northwest

Posts: 221

See profile

Thisonegoesto11 wrote :
I am sure this topic has come up before, but I am new to the boards and wanted to ask how long you should wait to talk about religious beliefs? I grew up is a very religious family and have some strong opinions on organized religion (most of them on the negative side). I am a spiritual person, but do not belong to a church. I cannot see myself getting serious with someone who is heavily involved in a church. Religion is such a personal subject, I just wanted advise on when to bring up the subject.
People who are heavily involved in their religion usually aren't too interested in folks who select "spiritual but not religious" on their profiles, thus if you have selected this option, many of them will close you before you have to say anything about your beliefs about organized religion.

In addition, the heavily involved types generally make mention of their church-going ways somewhere in their own profiles, since most are searching for someone of similiar interest level, thus you'll have a chance to close them out without, again, having to say anything about your beliefs.

In my experience, one of these two options usually does the trick when it comes to narrowing the field on religion and spirtuality.

Of course, if these two safeguards don't work and you find yourself "talking" with someone who is totally into organized religion, you should speak up during one of the early discussions and put this topic on the table.
 
  Reply With Quote
Diann1950 is offline Diann1950 Post #8  August 25,2009, 4:40pm
Diann1950's Avatar

Beginning to check seed catalogs, hope this year will be better for the garden.

Enthusiast

Joined: May 2009

Wichita Ks

Posts: 816

See profile

I have said this before, but it is still true. It depends a lot on your age and whether you are planning on starting a family. I am fairly religious, but since my kids are all raised there wouldn't be any conflicts on that issue. As long as your partner does not actively dispute your beliefs and practices go for it.
 
  Reply With Quote
Jacquiem is offline Jacquiem Post #9  August 25,2009, 5:07pm
Jacquiem's Avatar

is glad she can still surprise herself

Community Leader Alum

Joined: Apr 2009

Washington, DC

Posts: 511

See profile

I would agree that being honest and upfront about your religious beliefs immediately, in your profile is best.

I would also add that you avoid using terms like "bible thumpers" or "holy rollers" to describe religious people you're not interested in, or "Godless heathens" or "carnal" for people who are not as religious as you who you are not interested in. People's faith is a serious subject, and just because you don't agree with what they believe, you don't have to be negative about it. It's a preference just like everything else.
 
  Reply With Quote
Honestgetsdishonest is offline Honestgetsdishonest Post #10  August 25,2009, 5:22pm
Honestgetsdis…'s Avatar

hopes for better matches!!!

Newbie

Joined: Aug 2009

Houston

Posts: 29

See profile

Thisonegoesto11 wrote :
I am sure this topic has come up before, but I am new to the boards and wanted to ask how long you should wait to talk about religious beliefs? I grew up is a very religious family and have some strong opinions on organized religion (most of them on the negative side). I am a spiritual person, but do not belong to a church. I cannot see myself getting serious with someone who is heavily involved in a church. Religion is such a personal subject, I just wanted advise on when to bring up the subject.

Ask the guy about his faith as soon as possible. This is a HUGE closer for me. If a woman is agnostic, I would not date her. Same, women who are agnostic SAY IT ON THEIR PROFILE, men who are Christian say so on theirs.

So, if it is a big issue for you as it is for me, talk about it right away.

Make it clear in your profile, VERY CLEAR.
 
  Reply With Quote
Reply
  • Page 1 of 2
  • 1
  • 2


« How to maker sure he's not lying on his profile? | Dating | Why are we dating each other? »
Topic Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search

Posting Rules
You may not post new topics
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts
BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is On
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are Off

Similar Topics
Topic Topic Starter Board Replies Last Post
Would you convert to a new religion for love? eHA_Admin_Lori Religion & Spirituality 75 May 17,2010 11:29pm
What Religion Are You, Really? Wonderwoman402 Religion & Spirituality 41 October 21,2009 9:36pm
Science, religion and personality types awol71 Atheists, Humorists, and Science 19 July 27,2009 2:54pm
Is religion a barrier to relationships? JDavid Relationships 33 June 30,2009 1:53pm
Hypocrisy in Religion, are Atheists & Agnostics just as Bad? BenThruItAll Atheists, Humorists, and Science 5 May 17,2009 6:10pm

Looking for a Great Relationship?

Get started now. Fill out this form and take the questionnaire to receive your matches.

First Name:

I'm a:
seeking

Postal Code:

Country:

Email:

Confirm Email:

Password:


How did you hear about us?


Latest on our Dating Advice Discussion Boards

“It's important to understand the way a site works. Rigidly assuming / insisting that eH works likes all the others you're used to isn't utilizing the site functions to your best advantage. No.... ... ” –  Wiseman2

Join the “First contact on eHarmony, smile, questions, email?” discussion

“ If you have yet to meet, you don't know him or whether you two will form a connection. Connections formed over e-mail tend to be fantasies. You will see this echoed over and over by experienced ... ” –  shapeShifter79

Join the “How do i recoonect with him again?” discussion

“ Then it's a bit premature to worry about being friend-zoned. The first step is to go out on dates! What specific steps did you try? How many women did you ask out in person? Did you buy a ... ” –  shapeShifter79

Join the “For women to answer: How to avoid the friend zone” discussion

“ This is an old thread. She asked this in 2010. By now they are likely very exclusive or very over. ” –  shapeShifter79

Join the “is there a reason to ask if we're exclusive?” discussion

“ I'm sure he wouldn't get that. And I can't be sure that was the actual message. But it sems kind of likely to me.” –  boomer_gal

Join the “Why am I not successful?” discussion

“Hi eccemuliere and welcome to eHA.On an internet forum like eHA, you're going to get a wide variety of responses; some you'll like and some you won't. It's best to focus on the ones that speak to ... ” –  Sassafras54

Join the “Being blown off, or something else?” discussion

“ Although I have ignored my gut at times, in hindsight it's always been right, in terms of recognizing bad choices. QUOTE] But once we realize our past mistakes, we can use our reason to clue us ... ” –  eccemuliere

Join the “Is Your Gut Leading - or Misleading You?” discussion



All times are GMT -8. The time now is 10:19am.

Discussion Boards Archive

Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.4
Copyright ©2000 - 2012, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.
Search Engine Friendly URLs by vBSEO 3.6.0