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melman wrote :
I am never married and no kids, and I have no interest in inheriting another man's family. I close all matches that mention an ex in their profile, and I do not contact matches that mention children or grandchildren, and eventually close them. I just closed a match where more than a few sentences in the profile began with "As a mother...".

I accept that this makes my pool incredibly shallow.

Sometimes I wonder if there's any harm in going through the minimal effort of a first meeting with a single mom, just to find out if she might have a single (never-married no-kids) friend. But that's being dishonest or insincere.

The only possible exception I might consider would be for someone I already knew somehow, where I knew the circumstances. But to get dragged into someone else's family sight-unseen through eH? No way.
Wow, are you serious?
- October 28th, 2009, 08:19 pm
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Jayjay,
You need to start dating older women!! Our kids are all grown up and more than happy to be spoiled brats with their own SO's.
- October 28th, 2009, 08:30 pm
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Wow, are you serious?
Wow, why didn't you highlight the entire paragraph where I said of course I would never do this.
- October 28th, 2009, 08:55 pm
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Ephemera wrote :
Jayjay,
You need to start dating older women!! Our kids are all grown up and more than happy to be spoiled brats with their own SO's.
I have dated older women in the past. At this point I think I'd like to have a couple brats of my own, which means I need to go younger.
- October 28th, 2009, 08:56 pm
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melman wrote :
I am never married and no kids, and I have no interest in inheriting another man's family. I close all matches that mention an ex in their profile, and I do not contact matches that mention children or grandchildren, and eventually close them. I just closed a match where more than a few sentences in the profile began with "As a mother...".

I accept that this makes my pool incredibly shallow.

Sometimes I wonder if there's any harm in going through the minimal effort of a first meeting with a single mom, just to find out if she might have a single (never-married no-kids) friend. But that's being dishonest or insincere.

The only possible exception I might consider would be for someone I already knew somehow, where I knew the circumstances. But to get dragged into someone else's family sight-unseen through eH? No way.
Arrh, melman I'm getting a better sence as to why you've never been in a realtionship. And here was me thinking was due to your quirky photo.
- October 29th, 2009, 02:04 am
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I'd report this post if I wasn't well aware that you apparently live on another planet somehow.

You do know that's not my picture, right? I bet you think that's really me. Sheesh.

I don't want to step into an instant family. I can't be alone in this.
- October 29th, 2009, 08:47 am
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melman wrote :
I'd report this post if I wasn't well aware that you apparently live on another planet somehow.

You do know that's not my picture, right? I bet you think that's really me. Sheesh.

I don't want to step into an instant family. I can't be alone in this.
I can kinda understand where you are coming from. The first guy I dated was like oh you would be such an amazing mom for my kids. My first reaction was hell the f*** no! After hearing about his kids there was no way in hell I would ever live under the same roof.

After that I only dated guys who didn't have kids. Kinda a hypocrite aren't I? Unlike most parents of kids my age I don't find it impressive that they received the perfect sleeper award in kindergarten. Sorry, how is that life skill going to help them in the real world? My boss yells at me if I am found sleeping at my desk. Should I hold up my perfect sleeper award?

I have now found that guys I am attracted to are very much like me and tend to raise their kids the same as me. I actually like their kids. Oops, guess I didn't realize for a while that first guy was just an idiot.

Meh, you may be losing out on some great women. Still in the end your life, your choice. If you don't have a problem living with them why should we?
- October 29th, 2009, 09:35 am
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melman wrote :
I don't want to step into an instant family. I can't be alone in this.
Not at all. It's one of my only dealbreakers especially since at my age the kids are fairly young still.
- October 29th, 2009, 10:00 am
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melman wrote :
I'd report this post if I wasn't well aware that you apparently live on another planet somehow.
I don't want to step into an instant family. I can't be alone in this.
Oh.. Melman, Don't be so sensitive. Some of your posts can be viewed as attacks too.

I'm not sure why others are being so sensitive to your posts on this thread. You were just stating your preference. You are correct there are others that feel the same way you do. I am not one of them, but I'm certainly not going to attack/debate with you for that. It's your choice, end of story.

I am hanging out with a single mother right now. I say hanging out because we haven't gone on a actual date. Her son is 7mos. So we have been spending some time together watching movies and getting to know each other.(basically I've been babysitting while she naps.) and that's a whole nother thread!

For me it's doesn't matter if a potential match has children or not. As long there is the possibilty of having children of my own in the future, I do not rule out single mothers. So to answer the OP's question. I can't say I have a reason behind why I date single mothers. I'm just not going to dismiss a person because they have children.

Last edited by CaptCrunch23; October 29th, 2009 at 11:20 am.
- October 29th, 2009, 10:28 am
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melman wrote :
I'd report this post if I wasn't well aware that you apparently live on another planet somehow.

You do know that's not my picture, right? I bet you think that's really me. Sheesh.

I don't want to step into an instant family. I can't be alone in this.
I am with you on this, melman. I absolutely refuse to date or get involved with any men with children. Tried that once and it turned out to be a disaster. Of course, that's just me and they don't have to date me either . . . not to mention that I am not available anyway.
- October 29th, 2009, 10:30 am
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