Why Starbucks on 1st date?


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cuddley101 is offline cuddley101 Post #1  August 13,2009, 3:46am
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Tell me why do all men on e-harmony.com want to meet me at Starbucks for first date? We were supposed to go out for dinner, but my match changed his mind at the last minute to Starbucks. But then on the 2nd date he also wanted to meet at Starbucks. I suggested other places. My match says he has a lot of money, and is always working, and says we really had chemistry, but now he won't call or e-mail. I didn't tell my match I didn't like Starbucks. I do, but I think it's a cheap date? What do I do next? I was really interested in this match.
Last edited by cuddley101; August 13,2009 at 12:55pm. Reason: grammar mistakes
 
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Gr8Guyn2008 is offline Gr8Guyn2008 Post #2  August 13,2009, 6:54am
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Many people, both men and women, like to have a first date for coffee or a drink so that if it is not going well they can get out very quickly. However, most would then do a dinner or something similar for a second date. I am not sure how to read your match wanting a second date at Starbucks.

I don't drink coffee so Starbucks is not even on my list of first date places. I always do dinner for a first date. I figure that no matter how bad my match turns out to be I can handle an hour or two out of my life to spend with someone.
 
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jayjay is offline jayjay Post #3  August 13,2009, 7:09am
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...things seem to have gotten quiet around here.

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I can like going to a coffee shop for a first meeting (not really a date). This way, if there's something about her that I really don't like it isn't expected that we're going to be there for a long time and I can get out of there early. If I was interested I certainly wouldn't do a 2nd date at a coffee shop though.
 
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neardc is offline neardc Post #4  August 13,2009, 7:14am
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Starbucks is cheap...lol?

It's an easy way to have a first meeting to see if you would like to go on a real date. And, it's a place from which you can both easily escape if things aren't going well.
 
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Icouldwriteabook is offline Icouldwriteabook Post #5  August 13,2009, 7:19am
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jayjay wrote :
I can like going to a coffee shop for a first meeting (not really a date). This way, if there's something about her that I really don't like it isn't expected that we're going to be there for a long time and I can get out of there early. If I was interested I certainly wouldn't do a 2nd date at a coffee shop though.
I agree with jayjay. I also prefer a simple first date because I would feel guilty if the guy paid for a whole dinner or something if there ended up being no interest on my part.
Now, a second coffee date, hm, that would have me wondering.....
Even if he didn't have a lot of money, a second coffee date does not show a lot of imagination. How about Jamba Juice, an ice cream place, a bike ride, a walk in the park......?
 
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landstar59 is offline landstar59 Post #6  August 13,2009, 7:21am
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cuddley101 wrote :
Tell me why do all men want to meet at Starbucks for 1st dates, does this mean the guy is cheap? Then on 2nd date he still wants to take you to Starbucks? Should you not date this person? Need help?
Why not a coffee shop? I think it is a good way to test the waters to see if you like this person enough to date them further and I'd rather meet in a coffee shop anyday that to meet in a bar. If things aren't going well a dinner date may be TOO long of a wait for an exit. I personally don't take it to mean the man is anything but possibly interested.
 
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brneyedangel is offline brneyedangel Post #7  August 13,2009, 7:30am
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cuddley101 wrote :
Tell me why do all men want to meet at Starbucks for 1st dates, does this mean the guy is cheap? Then on 2nd date he still wants to take you to Starbucks? Should you not date this person? Need help?
There's nothing wrong with a first date at Starbucks for all of the reasons listed above, but let me ask you this: if you dislike this as a first date so much, what alternative suggestions have you made to change this?

As for a second date, I'd say he's lacking in creativity. This doesn't mean you shouldn't date him, just that he may need some help coming up with some good ideas. So why haven't you jumped in and suggested anything prior to now?
 
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AsianFusion is offline AsianFusion Post #8  August 13,2009, 7:39am
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I don't understand why everyone wants to meet at Starbucks either . . . it's always so noisy in there.

I agree with icouldwritabook, why not an ice-cream parlor, or a little sandwich place, or a fast-food restaurant?
 
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KennyM57 is offline KennyM57 Post #9  August 13,2009, 7:41am
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To me a coffee shop is a neutral place to meet, the smell of the coffee has a calming effect. They are usually not loud places so you can sit and have a conversation. As far a 'Starbucks' being 'cheap', there are other shops that are less expensive, it's just that there are allot more SB shops around and are probably easy reference points to set up a meeting place.
 
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jayjay is offline jayjay Post #10  August 13,2009, 7:43am
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...things seem to have gotten quiet around here.

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Maybe he likes to look at the H.S. girls who hang out there.
 
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