What to say when you get rejected?


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OverAnalyzer is offline OverAnalyzer Post #11  August 11,2009, 3:50pm
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Even better is to get her to laugh before you ask. Even if she says no, she'll walk away smiling and will think about you more than you think. She may even come up to you a day or two later and ask if you are still interested...
 
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jayjay is offline jayjay Post #12  August 11,2009, 3:58pm
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...things seem to have gotten quiet around here.

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First of all....just asking a woman IRL out to dinner seems too boring and predictable to me. I'd likely ask her to do something more fun (or at least unusual)...like go surfing, to an upcoming blues festival, or even something quirky like going to hit golf balls.

If I did want to have dinner with her....I'd probably ask her 'Why don't you take me out to dinner sometime?' At least it's different or even a little funny.

When asking her something such as in this way it isn't so serious or formal like 'Will you go out to dinner with me?'....then to me it seems easier to have a more casual or fun reaction like 'Oh no...shot down'. Also, maybe you could ask her to go to a specific type of dinner.....like to get sushi, to go to an oyster bar or something like that, where the idea is you'll be doing something unusual and interesting. Good luck.
 
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jayjay is offline jayjay Post #13  August 11,2009, 3:59pm
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...things seem to have gotten quiet around here.

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Moderated.....and I can't even imagine what bad word I might have said, lol.
 
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Mainah64 is offline Mainah64 Post #14  August 11,2009, 4:20pm
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Reminds me of a line from a movie.

Guy: Will you go out with me?
Girl: No.
Guy: Then I guess a b***job is out of the question.
Reminds me of what I said to the ex years back when picking her up after having her wisdom teeth pulled.

Some people have no sense of humor. Go figure.
 
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Shelby is offline Shelby Post #15  August 11,2009, 4:28pm
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said what she meant; meant what she said.

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Did you "prime" the conversation and catch any signs that she would be interested in spending more time with you? By priming, I mean that you actually made some light conversation, didn't get argumentative or sullen; smiled, laughed with her, etc. And did she have eye contact with you, smile, laugh at your jokes, keep up the conversation? Is she showing signs of receptivity?

The level of her interest would help to gauge whether you should ask her out for dinner versus lunch or coffee or a walk down the street to her car, or not to even bother.
 
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hazmat is offline hazmat Post #16  August 11,2009, 4:33pm
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How many times has this happened ?
 
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D_Lion is offline D_Lion Post #17  August 11,2009, 5:00pm
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cp30 wrote :
"I can't because I have to *fill in the blank*"

Guys, make note. This is how women lie when they lack the self-confidence is say “no.” This is worse than “no,” because it is also deceit, and deliberately demeaning.
[COLOR=black][FONT=Calibri]
 
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D_Lion is offline D_Lion Post #18  August 11,2009, 5:02pm
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hazmat wrote :
How many times has this happened ?

And was it always the same woman?
 
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FengShuiBlackBelt is offline FengShuiBlackBelt Post #19  August 11,2009, 5:05pm
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D_Lion wrote :
Guys, make note. This is how women lie when they lack the self-confidence is say “no.” This is worse than “no,” because it is also deceit, and deliberately demeaning.
Many women don't even have the guts to lie. They'll accept the date then not show up.
 
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MarkInAustin is offline MarkInAustin Post #20  August 11,2009, 5:23pm
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"have you ever had a woman say "no" and nothing else? or are you just looking out for the no and focusing on it?"

I've had one "no", one "I don't think so", and one "Sorry, I'm not interested".

I also had one that went something like this (this was back in college, she was in one of my classes):

Me: Would you go to lunch with me?
Her: I don't know you very well...
Me: Isn't that what a date is for? To get to know each other better?
Her: I'm not interested.

The only reason that I remember this one is that I actually ran into her cousin a couple of months later (he turned out to be a friend of my roommate). Her cousin said that she was complaining that nobody ever asked her out. Boy that sure made me feel good

The one that just said "no" was kind of funny. She said it so off-hand that you would have thought I asked her if it was raining or something:

Me: Do you want to go out with me?
Her: No.
Me: Is it still raining outside?
Her: No.

But, the reason I ask is that I don't feel comfortable asking women out, and it is mostly because of fear of rejection. I was thinking if I had a better response if I get rejected, I might not fear it so much.
 
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