do you bring up "sex" before you two meet?


Reply
 
Topic Tools Search this Thread
treeye is offline treeye Post #1  August 10,2009, 7:43pm
treeye's Avatar

Quick Study

Joined: May 2008

Posts: 136

See profile

I heard if a guy bring up topics about sex before you two even meet, then he's just looking for that.

is it true?
 
  Reply With Quote
jayjay is offline jayjay Post #2  August 10,2009, 8:03pm
jayjay's Avatar

...things seem to have gotten quiet around here.

Sage

Joined: Jun 2008

Brownsville, TX

Posts: 10,932

See profile

Unless there's some very extenuating reason....guys who bring up sex before you even meet them are just social retards. Even a guy who just wants to have sex with you should know better than to do that.
 
  Reply With Quote
Shads is offline Shads Post #3  August 10,2009, 8:13pm
Shads's Avatar

is living life....and getting in trouble along the way! LOL

Enthusiast

Joined: Jan 2009

Chicago

Posts: 645

See profile

treeye wrote :
I heard if a guy bring up topics about sex before you two even meet, then he's just looking for that.

is it true?

Ohhhhh... hard to say. They may just be 'feeling' you out. There are other needs as well when it comes to relationships. He/she may be getting it out of the way so you two don't waste your time.

There are people out there that do not like sex. Therefore, people may investigate their potential mate about their sexual needs.
 
  Reply With Quote
BobinFla is offline BobinFla Post #4  August 10,2009, 8:22pm
BobinFla's Avatar

is enjoying his retirement.

Veteran

Joined: Dec 2008

SW Florida

Posts: 1,738

See profile

I like to be able to disuss any topic, but this statement does not mean that I have to talk about sex. I like for it to be open to talk about anything, even though a lot of topics will only be talked about after meeting.

Relegating a guy to only wanting sex because he goes to talk about it before meeting is not necessarily a fair action ( but then too, it should not be brought up in the first conversations). It really depends on how well both of you click together as to what can be discussed when.

Part of getting to know each other is talking on different subjects, how else can two people find out where the other stands on a subject if it is not talked about (and don't get me wrong, sex is not the only thing and the most important thing to talk about, there are other important things to talk about).
 
  Reply With Quote
Wonderwoman402 is offline Wonderwoman402 Post #5  August 10,2009, 8:35pm
Wonderwoman40…'s Avatar

L'Chayim!

Virtuoso

Joined: Jan 2009

Omaha, NE

Posts: 4,495

See profile

It probably depends on HOW he brings it up. Was it a comment related to something in the news? Or was it a flirty comment with some sexual innuendo? If so, I would not assume he's just looking for sex.

But if he's already asking you about your favorite positions or whether you spit or swallow before you've even met... then, yeah, he's probably just looking for sex.
 
  Reply With Quote
Sweetyflea is offline Sweetyflea Post #6  August 10,2009, 8:36pm
Sweetyflea's Avatar

uh....that's odd??

Quick Study

Joined: Jul 2009

California

Posts: 81

See profile

treeye wrote :
I heard if a guy bring up topics about sex before you two even meet, then he's just looking for that.
is it true?
I feel it's all what he's looking for if he brings it up before I meet him, because when a guy gets into the topic about sex before I meet him, it just means that's all he wants when I meet him and to me he doesn't want to know me, doesn't have any respect for the individual I am, sees me as an object rather than an human being and doesn't want to formally go on the date with me go to a nice resturant, go out in public, go miniture golfing, or to the movies, etc.

I understand that the topic of sex is important, but I would not bring it up at all in the early stages of dating yet. Maybe after a couple of months of dating that turns into a relationship, maybe bring up the topic, but for now, I wouldn't bring up that topic, too early in the dating stages.
Last edited by Sweetyflea; August 10,2009 at 8:39pm.
 
  Reply With Quote
Shads is offline Shads Post #7  August 10,2009, 8:41pm
Shads's Avatar

is living life....and getting in trouble along the way! LOL

Enthusiast

Joined: Jan 2009

Chicago

Posts: 645

See profile

Wonderwoman402 wrote :
It probably depends on HOW he brings it up. Was it a comment related to something in the news? Or was it a flirty comment with some sexual innuendo? If so, I would not assume he's just looking for sex.

But if he's already asking you about your favorite positions or whether you spit or swallow before you've even met... then, yeah, he's probably just looking for sex.



heh..good point.
 
  Reply With Quote
vapsman88 is offline vapsman88 Post #8  August 10,2009, 8:42pm
vapsman88's Avatar

is happy.

Virtuoso

Joined: May 2008

Atlanta

Posts: 4,819

See profile

treeye wrote :
I heard if a guy bring up topics about sex before you two even meet, then he's just looking for that.

is it true?
Duh!
 
  Reply With Quote
Honestgetsdishonest is offline Honestgetsdishonest Post #9  August 10,2009, 9:13pm
Honestgetsdis…'s Avatar

hopes for better matches!!!

Newbie

Joined: Aug 2009

Houston

Posts: 29

See profile

treeye wrote :
I heard if a guy bring up topics about sex before you two even meet, then he's just looking for that.

is it true?
True. It is no secret that guys with excellent social skills, good self esteem and good looks can win over a great majority of women for sexual conquest.

Men that strive for a "relationship" will want to meet you and see if there is chemistry. If things go really well, some people will go right out and have sex. I think that would be a mistake.

The standard for a "normal" relationship is usually 3 dates.

DATE 1. Meet, talk, check each other out. If all is good, a hug and a quick kiss before you go home alone. The next day, if you feel really good about your date, go one date two.

DATE 2. Dinner, wine, more intimate conversation. If sparks are there, from time to time through out the conversation you discreetly talk about turn ons and turn offs. I mean, if things go well, you don't want your first time with the person to be awkward, SO TELL US WHAT YOU LIKE and WHERE NOT TO GO. Go to his or her place and make out, and really "feel" each other..BUT NO SEX. The next day, if you feel really good about your date, go one date three.

DATE 3. Romantic dinner, romantic conversation, some sex talk but romance is the theme, don't spoil things, build up the heat. Guys MUST be carful NOT to drink to much. If you get drunk, it will desinthisize your nurvous system, especially where you WANT to be able to be stimulated. Go to her place or his place, where ever is the most comfortable. If you are both really feeling it, jump in! At this point, I would ask if she wanted to be exclusive before I asked her to bed. If she said something like "I just need sex" or "I have other boyfriends" BOOM end of date!

Use all proper precautions before being intiment. Some women ask if I have any sexually transmitable desease. I don't so I ask them the same question. If you both want unpretected sex, don't be STUPID. Go together to the local clinic and get tested, exchange results.

Now wasn't that fun..LOL
 
  Reply With Quote
IcecreamMoon is offline IcecreamMoon Post #10  August 10,2009, 9:19pm
IcecreamMoon's Avatar

Nothing to see here at all...

Virtuoso

Joined: May 2009

Posts: 2,847

See profile

vapsman88 wrote :
Duh!
How's is that 10 characters?
The tech support must be drinking again...

OP,
Please speak to your therapist. Thanks.
 
  Reply With Quote
Reply


« Should I pursue this or move on? | Dating | Confused!! »
Topic Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search

Posting Rules
You may not post new topics
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts
BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is On
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are Off

Similar Topics
Topic Topic Starter Board Replies Last Post
Maryland/Virginia/Washington, DC Meet & Greet PoliticalChick01 Washington DC metro area 14 December 3,2009 9:39am
Help! He wants to meet! Luna1 Dating 20 August 7,2009 12:40pm
should I meet him if I'm not that excited about his profile? treeye Dating 33 August 3,2009 9:42am
but I really want to meet other women cp30 About You 24 July 1,2009 7:22pm
First Meet...after 10 months of communication... radiogirl953 Ask a Dating Expert 8 June 25,2009 1:18pm

Looking for a Great Relationship?

Get started now. Fill out this form and take the questionnaire to receive your matches.

First Name:

I'm a:
seeking

Postal Code:

Country:

Email:

Confirm Email:

Password:


How did you hear about us?


Latest on our Dating Advice Discussion Boards

“Wow Legend, you have been through a lot! OP, about 2 months ago, I went gluten-free and dairy-free with the exception of an occasional greek yogurt with fruit a few times a week. My main reason why ... ” –  legend29

Join the “Living Without....” discussion

“ I did not discourage the OP from meeting him....just wanted her to also be sure to be safe and not throw caution to the wind. I hope she has a great time and posts to the board how successful her ... ” –  legend29

Join the “a match wants to meet me in a foreign country” discussion

“The perpetrator at my work has slowed their controlling ways a bit. But, I think the damage is done for some and she will never be anything but an annoyance to them. She's much quieter, though seems ... ” –  legend29

Join the “Who's the Boss?” discussion

“Oh, I forgot to give an example from my family of origin. Both my grandpa and my father had their own successful businesses. We lived together in a 4 floor building occupying different flats but we ... ” –  elliechris

Join the “When is friendship a problem” discussion

“Most anyone has been there I imagine. My advice is: don't over think it, it's all a numbers game (more for some than others), focus on your happiness/life, and work on your market value.” –  Raw_Truth

Join the “Very discouraged.” discussion

“ I figured it had something to do with that "hair gel" that Cameron Diaz was using in the movie "There's Something About Mary"...” –  Shelby

Join the “What kind of add you see on this board?” discussion

“I used to do this in my youth. A couple relevant factors likely were that I broke up with them, they would have liked to re-engage and I had poor boundaries--desperately wanting to stay friends. ... ” –  EccentricAmbiguity

Join the “Hold on, hold on, hold on!” discussion



All times are GMT -8. The time now is 5:45am.

Discussion Boards Archive

Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.4
Copyright ©2000 - 2012, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.
Search Engine Friendly URLs by vBSEO 3.6.0