boccabum is offline boccabum Post #1  August 8,2009, 11:30am
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OK, Lizziepooh asked it so now I'm posting it.
Do you know men that have initiated a divorce? If yes, what was their reason?
I know many divorced people and couples. Many. I can't think of any of them where the man initiated the divorce.
I can safely guess that of those men who do, there are probably 2 reasons: infidelity or (in the case of the men) finding someone else and divorcing to avoid being a cheater.
What do you think?
 
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jayjay is offline jayjay Post #2  August 8,2009, 11:41am
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...things seem to have gotten quiet around here.

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Let's see those I can think of offhand:

A guy I worked with who left his wife after she had sex with someone else. He also got custody of their 8 year old autistic son.

My cousin's husband left her. He loaded up their 2 ATVs on a trailer and took off. I guess he got what he wanted out of the relationship, lol. This was no big surprise, as when they married they were two party-hardy kids right out of college. Their marriage lasted about 6 months.

An uncle of mine who left his wife (mother of his 3 daughters) beause he 'didn't love her anymore'. My impression is that what this really meant was he wanted someone more attractive, which he found a couple years later.
 
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D_Lion is offline D_Lion Post #3  August 8,2009, 11:45am
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None that I know, but most divorced people I know I do not know enough about them to know.

Know what I mean?
 
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boccabum is offline boccabum Post #4  August 8,2009, 11:50am
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jayjay wrote :
Let's see those I can think of offhand:

A guy I worked with who left his wife after she had sex with someone else. He also got custody of their 8 year old autistic son.

My cousin's husband left her. He loaded up their 2 ATVs on a trailer and took off. I guess he got what he wanted out of the relationship, lol. This was no big surprise, as when they married they were two party-hardy kids right out of college. Their marriage lasted about 6 months.

An uncle of mine who left his wife (mother of his 3 daughters) beause he 'didn't love her anymore'. My impression is that what this really meant was he wanted someone more attractive, which he found a couple years later.
Good answers. I think the reason I asked was that I find it hard to imagine men would leave a marriage for the same reasons women would. Many women leave for lack of compatability, communication, change by the men, laziness, etc (although they should have figured these out before they got married). The others because of more major reasons like cheating, abuse, or substance abuse.
Men, on the other hand, won't leave a marriage for lack of communication, for example. It seems that there are different expectations of what a marriage should be based on gender.
 
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Wonderwoman402 is offline Wonderwoman402 Post #5  August 8,2009, 11:52am
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In my case my ex-husband filed for divorce. I would have filed first, but I was waiting for him to get a job.
 
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CreolePrincess is offline CreolePrincess Post #6  August 8,2009, 11:56am
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I one who said he did, but just knowing him and his situation, I'm not sure I believe him.
 
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jayjay is offline jayjay Post #7  August 8,2009, 11:56am
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...things seem to have gotten quiet around here.

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In my case my ex-husband filed for divorce. I would have filed first, but I was waiting for him to get a job.
I guess he didn't want to wait that long. LOL
 
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Wonderwoman402 is offline Wonderwoman402 Post #8  August 8,2009, 11:57am
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jayjay wrote :
I guess he didn't want to wait that long. LOL
I guess not!
 
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D_Lion is offline D_Lion Post #9  August 8,2009, 12:07pm
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boccabum wrote :
Many women leave for lack of compatability, communication, change by the men, laziness, etc. The others because of more major reasons like cheating, abuse, or substance abuse.

I think this is due to men making a marriage decision prior to getting married. They just don’t get married in the first place to someone that they don’t want to be married to; so unless she changes for the worse, there is no reason to divorce.
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j0hn8andy is offline j0hn8andy Post #10  August 8,2009, 12:19pm
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I know several men that initiated divorces. And to a man, they did it for infidelity. Their own. Some went on to marry the girlfriends, some did not.

Now that I think of it, that's not exactly true. Having spent many years in San Francisco, I knew alot of gay men. You'd be surprised to learn how many of them had been previously married, to women, and had children!

I know far more women that initiated divorces. Many, many reasons. Including one that went lesbian.
 
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