How to maker sure he's not lying on his profile?


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treeye is offline treeye Post #1  August 7,2009, 7:37pm
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I know most ppl on online dating websites are real and good people. but I just want to be a little bit more careful.

what if the guy I'm contacting does not give his last name? could I just ask? what's a better way to ask? and maybe I ask for his cell phone number and do a background search?

thanks.
 
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D_Lion is offline D_Lion Post #2  August 7,2009, 7:42pm
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I would not ask a match his last name.

Since there is no reason to ask this, a person would rightly worry about you for asking.

Should you persist in this view, I would try to communicate during working hours - this way you are likely to get his office e-mail or phone mail, which will have his full name.
Last edited by D_Lion; August 7,2009 at 7:44pm.
 
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IcecreamMoon is offline IcecreamMoon Post #3  August 7,2009, 7:45pm
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Personally, I wouldn't bother. Amature background checks are boring and can be misleading.

At this stage, if you are feeling suspicious, just move on. Personally, I prefer real life men, myself. Not profiles... that word alone brings all kinds of associations with it, to me.
 
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CreolePrincess is offline CreolePrincess Post #4  August 7,2009, 7:47pm
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If you're eH, you can take time get to know each other through emails and secure calls before given out private information about yourselves. Remember, just as you have reservations about him telling the truth, he may have those same reservations about you. You probably should wait until you've gotten to know him better.
 
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followmesky is offline followmesky Post #5  August 7,2009, 8:22pm
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if you are already suspicious, I would let it go. follow your instincts..
 
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boccabum is offline boccabum Post #6  August 7,2009, 8:59pm
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While I understand the reasons to be careful in this day and age, I think that there are some things that cross the line. Rather than automatically assuming everyone you encounter online requires a background check, assume their good people like you. Get to know them first and don't worry if everything they say is a lie. To me, that level of fear would ruin the experience. A background check should only be done, if at all, after you've met the person, gotten to know them, are considering a relationship but have valid reason to think they're not being honest. Otherwise, it's an insult. What would you think of a guy who runs a background check on you or looked at your financial info before he agrees to meet you on a first date?
 
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Oregon_Coast_Guy is offline Oregon_Coast_Guy Post #7  August 7,2009, 9:15pm
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treeye wrote :
I know most ppl on online dating websites are real and good people. but I just want to be a little bit more careful.

what if the guy I'm contacting does not give his last name? could I just ask? what's a better way to ask? and maybe I ask for his cell phone number and do a background search?

thanks.

Sorry, but you are sounding just a little bit stalker-ish right now.
 
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Gr8Guyn2008 is offline Gr8Guyn2008 Post #8  August 7,2009, 9:21pm
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IcecreamMoon wrote :
Personally, I wouldn't bother. Amature background checks are boring and can be misleading.

At this stage, if you are feeling suspicious, just move on. Personally, I prefer real life men, myself. Not profiles... that word alone brings all kinds of associations with it, to me.
You seem to have a lot of problems with words.
 
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Gr8Guyn2008 is offline Gr8Guyn2008 Post #9  August 7,2009, 9:32pm
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treeye wrote :
I know most ppl on online dating websites are real and good people. but I just want to be a little bit more careful.

what if the guy I'm contacting does not give his last name? could I just ask? what's a better way to ask? and maybe I ask for his cell phone number and do a background search?

thanks.
Are you going to give your last name? I didn't think so. Why should I give you my last name if you are not going to give me your last name? When we get to the point of setting up a date I will give you my cell phone number and I expect that you will give me your cell phone number. If you don't then there won't be a second date.

I know a couple of girls that will have a background check made of a prospective date. I asked if they had had me checked out and they said "no I was safe". I don't know what it is about me that leads them to view me as safe and someone else as suspicious but it must be something about how I answer question and communicate. Therefore it would seem to come down to trust your gut. If you suspect that someone is not exactly who they claim they are then you should probably move on to another match.
 
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IcecreamMoon is offline IcecreamMoon Post #10  August 7,2009, 9:49pm
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Gr8Guyn2008 wrote :
You seem to have a lot of problems with words.
Nah, I just like to play with them
 
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