islandrain80 is offline islandrain80 Post #1  August 5,2009, 7:13am
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This isn't a question, and I'm not looking for advice...just felt like posting this.

Ever had those times where you wonder if he likes you, if he'll call...if he does call but not that often is he that into you? Or is he just calling because he's got nothing better to do? Does he really think about you, or just when he's got nothing else on his mind? You wonder and ask advice from all your friends. Who, each in turn, tells you something different. Making you more confused.

Then, out of the blue you have a moment of clarity. Not from the advice, just your mind snapping into reality and telling you flat out...to move on.

I had that this morning, and gotta say it felt good.
 
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happyquestion is offline happyquestion Post #2  August 5,2009, 7:27am
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it must be a liberating feeling, congratulations!
 
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Gr8Guyn2008 is offline Gr8Guyn2008 Post #3  August 5,2009, 7:36am
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Within the dating world I live in a constant state of confusion and uncertainty.

Do I call every day? Does this make me seem desperate or needy?

If I don't call every day does this send a signal that I am not into her?

Does she expect that if we are not on a date that I should call every day to have a long phone conversation? Or is just a short call to say "hi" what I should do?

Bottom line whatever I do it will be wrong because each one of you girls is going to be different in what you want and expect and come hell or high water you certainly won't tell me what you would like. I have even started asking this question in early communication and have yet to get a straight answer.
Last edited by Gr8Guyn2008; August 5,2009 at 7:38am. Reason: add information
 
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gothustartus is offline gothustartus Post #4  August 5,2009, 8:16am
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islandrain80 wrote :
Then, out of the blue you have a moment of clarity. Not from the advice, just your mind snapping into reality and telling you flat out...to move on.

I had that this morning, and gotta say it felt good.
Instinct is a wonderful thing, it's when we buck our instincts that the trouble starts.
 
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waypoint_finder is offline waypoint_finder Post #5  August 5,2009, 8:28am

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How do you distinguish a 'moment of clarity' from a 'moment of insecurity' or a 'moment of paranoia'?
 
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gothustartus is offline gothustartus Post #6  August 5,2009, 8:45am
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waypoint_finder wrote :
How do you distinguish a 'moment of clarity' from a 'moment of insecurity' or a 'moment of paranoia'?
I'm so tempted to give Yodas Jedi speech here.
 
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islandrain80 is offline islandrain80 Post #7  August 5,2009, 9:01am
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gothustartus wrote :
I'm so tempted to give Yodas Jedi speech here.
Don't hold back with the Yoda!
 
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islandrain80 is offline islandrain80 Post #8  August 5,2009, 9:03am
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Gr8Guyn2008 wrote :
Within the dating world I live in a constant state of confusion and uncertainty.

Do I call every day? Does this make me seem desperate or needy?

If I don't call every day does this send a signal that I am not into her?

Does she expect that if we are not on a date that I should call every day to have a long phone conversation? Or is just a short call to say "hi" what I should do?

Bottom line whatever I do it will be wrong because each one of you girls is going to be different in what you want and expect and come hell or high water you certainly won't tell me what you would like. I have even started asking this question in early communication and have yet to get a straight answer.
I agree 100%. To many questions and with everyone being different, to many answers! With this guy I've been dating, I've received various forms of advice from be patient, be aggressive and you can do better.

My moment of clarity told me I deserve better, I'm tired of being aggressive (i.e initiating the conversations) and I willing to be patient if the other party is willing to show more interest.

And it was very liberating!
 
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Ms666 is offline Ms666 Post #9  August 5,2009, 9:11am
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I hear you on the clarity! WTG! It's awesome to be able to acknowledge when to move on.

I am with you on not initiating conversations with a guy, anytime I go there, things almost instantly get weird. Either he is interested enough to pursue you or not. I'm all for leaving it up him. Men are supposed to chase us girls anyway... that and kill the bugs for us.
 
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Gr8Guyn2008 is offline Gr8Guyn2008 Post #10  August 5,2009, 9:17am
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Gr8Guyn2008 wrote :
Within the dating world I live in a constant state of confusion and uncertainty.

Do I call every day? Does this make me seem desperate or needy?

If I don't call every day does this send a signal that I am not into her?

Does she expect that if we are not on a date that I should call every day to have a long phone conversation? Or is just a short call to say "hi" what I should do?

Bottom line whatever I do it will be wrong because each one of you girls is going to be different in what you want and expect and come hell or high water you certainly won't tell me what you would like. I have even started asking this question in early communication and have yet to get a straight answer.
islandrain80 wrote :
I agree 100%. To many questions and with everyone being different, to many answers! With this guy I've been dating, I've received various forms of advice from be patient, be aggressive and you can do better.

My moment of clarity told me I deserve better, I'm tired of being aggressive (i.e initiating the conversations) and I willing to be patient if the other party is willing to show more interest.

And it was very liberating!
I don't know you, I don't know the guy and I don't know the situation, but I will wonder aloud how often you (and others) have "liberated" yourselves out of a great relationship because you did not communicate.
 
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