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Ssusprina Ssusprina is offline
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Gr8Guyn2008 wrote :
If you were one of my matches you would have just poofed.

However, an e-mail will be sufficient. You can be factual and state that there was no "chemistry" or that you don't think that you are a good match.
Poof on you... no way!

Gotta agree, best way is to just be honest. Leave a note, tell them straight out. I dont want to be left hanging... why do it to someone else .
Last edited by Ssusprina; August 25th, 2009 at 09:26 pm. Reason: spellling
- August 25th, 2009, 09:25 pm
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DanielJr82 DanielJr82 is offline
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Don't beat around the bush. Just be honest with him. He needs to man up, I guess.
- August 25th, 2009, 10:05 pm
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dietpepsi dietpepsi is offline
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You'll gain experience over time. I used to do the same, feel guilty about rejecting people, but not anymore.

It saves everyone time.
- August 27th, 2009, 09:34 pm
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gothustartus gothustartus is offline
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It's not always possible to turn someone down without hurting his feelings, if your perception of his neediness is accurate then he is likely to be hurt by the rejection no matter how politely you put it.
At the end of the day you can only do so much, be polite in saying that you're not really interested and don't think a second date is a good idea, if he is hurt by that then harsh as it may sound that's his problem, not yours. As long as you're not nasty about it then you've done all you reasonably can.
- August 27th, 2009, 11:08 pm
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nishatika nishatika is offline
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EMail him. we all get that email now and then , and the men are used to it.
You had a great time, he is a great guy, you do not feel the chemistry is there, and then wish him good luck on his search!
Short, polite and simple and to the point!
He doesn't have your number, so no big deal, then close the match!
- September 10th, 2009, 10:35 am
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Oregon_Coast_Guy Oregon_Coast_Guy is offline
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It will not be possible to tell him without hurting his feelings. Just accept that. All you have to do is say, "I'm not interested in you and will not be meeting you for lunch." Don't tell him he's great, don't tell him you had a nice time, don't wish him luck and don't come up with an excuse or justification. This is not rude. You said nothing negative about him.

If that hurts him, then it hurts him. Rather than concentrate on how bad he will feel, concentrate on how good you will feel to be rid of him.
- September 10th, 2009, 01:16 pm
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UVACav UVACav is offline
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To the women: How would you handle it if the guy asked you out again, but was clear that, since you just met, no thank you would not create an awkward situation. I'm in this situation right now where I think i'm being blown off but, when I make it easy for her to make an exit, shes not taking it. I can't tell if it's disinterest or shyness....
- September 10th, 2009, 03:52 pm
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peg099 peg099 is offline
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Mainah64 wrote :
Be direct, honest, and say it soon. I guess a quick email would be fine and if you are still finding it difficult, throw in some fluff as to how he is a nice guy, etc, but add that you are sure that you aren't a match.
Whatever you do, don't tell him he's a nice guy. His brain will twist that into the reason that you're not interested, and he'll start whining about how women don't want nice guys.

Just politely tell him you don't think the two of you are a match. Keep it short and simple.

Stating it as not being a match also keeps it completely free of any implication that something is wrong with him or it's his fault. An insecure person would completely latch on to the slightest thing that might seem like blame (even if that's not how you intend it). So just don't go there.
- September 10th, 2009, 04:20 pm
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