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followmesky followmesky is offline
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legend29 wrote :
I read a study that stated African-American and Latinas rarely venture out of their race and are thus not placed high on some dating site lists because they either do not subscribe to mixed-race dating sites in droves...and/or usually prefer African-American and Latin dating sites. When I date caucasian men, they often say "Wow...I am attracted to women of color, but when I ask them out for a date, they always shrug and walk away".
legend29 wrote :

As a black/latina I can honestly say that I find this to be true among my circle of friends and co-workers. Though my family is multi-ethnic, my black and hispanic female friends tend to be extremely loyal to dating their own men...and there is a high stigma placed on them in their culture and neighborhoods if they venture outside of the norm.
These may also be a variables as to why African-American and Latin women are not placed high as a desired mate on predominantly caucasian sites....and trust me...my friends could care less if they aren't sought after by 'other' men.

I ask my friends why so loyal...because "their" men have no qualms dating outside of their race and do they understand that they will stay single longer if they stay within their own little dating world...I usually get blank looks and get shouted down so I keep my mouth shut nowadays and just do my own thing.

I don't date race/ethnicity...I date character and heart...not a problem for me to date outside of my race. But when I do, my friends don't want to meet him, and if I bring him to a function that is predominantly black and/or latino, he and I are shunned.

Oh well....to each his/her own....*double sigh*

(These are my personal experiences....I welcome any other women of color to add their opinions to this...but seeing as how there aren't many on this site, I'll just sit in my corner and say "hmmmmm....".)
Perhaps the answer is, like the African Americans, Hispanic Americans have been struggling against discrimination and poverty, lack of education, and low economic power. Despite these, many notable Hispanic Americans and African Americans have established as a formidable force in the fields of entertainment, sports, politics, science, business and education, well you get the picture. Well, as a result, they may feel they can best relate with African Americans and or Hispanics, though, its ignorant to say as we are not all the same. It seems to me they are only seeing their picture, the smaller picture, the stereotypical picture. But it may be their safest.
As you know the Hispanic American culture is as pervasive as the African American culture. Hispanic American food, dances and music are now as equally appreciated and accepted by the general public.
The united states is making a transition from predominantly white culture to one that is increasingly culturally diverse.
- August 13th, 2009, 11:10 pm
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followmesky followmesky is offline
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followmesky wrote :
[i]

Perhaps the answer is, like the African Americans, Hispanic Americans have been struggling against discrimination and poverty, lack of education, and low economic power. Despite these, many notable Hispanic Americans and African Americans have established as a formidable force in the fields of entertainment, sports, politics, science, business and education, well you get the picture. Well, as a result, they may feel they can best relate with African Americans and or Hispanics, though, its ignorant to say as we are not all the same. It seems to me they are only seeing their picture, the smaller picture, the stereotypical picture. But it may be their safest.
As you know the Hispanic American culture is as pervasive as the African American culture. Hispanic American food, dances and music are now as equally appreciated and accepted by the general public.
The united states is making a transition from predominantly white culture to one that is increasingly culturally diverse.
just to add to my comment, we may be different but we all come from the same place,regardless of race and color. See tonight's premier of ; " The Human Family Tree" on natgeo.
- August 30th, 2009, 10:49 pm
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Seneca Seneca is offline
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If you get deeply involved with an Hispanic woman whose family is not far away - don't be surprised to learn that you are, and will always be, "gringo" and that everything Hispanic is always better than everything "gringo", and I mean everything. And don't let them know how much Spanish you really understand because you'll hear some interesting comments about yourself when they shift gears to speaking Spanish.
There are many very beautiful Hispanic women and many very handsome Hispanic men, and they may become your "intimates", but you will always be "gringo" and their Loyalty doesn't abide in "gringo".
They will expect you to assimilate into their family as a second-class member but you can forget about them even thinking about trying to assimilate into your family.
- August 31st, 2009, 09:30 am
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Seneca wrote :
...and that everything Hispanic is always better than everything "gringo", and I mean everything.
Are you implying it isn't?

Sounds like you've had a bad experience.
- August 31st, 2009, 10:42 am
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trixie1868 trixie1868 is offline
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I'm all for the vice versa.

I had a spanish boyfriend for 6 months, we're still good friends. It was nothing but fabulous.

I had a wild fling with a crazy Brazilian and a perfectly pleasant date with a Portuguese economist.

There should definitely be more of this kind of thing.
- August 31st, 2009, 01:38 pm
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meanminicooper meanminicooper is offline
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Any advice for men who date latin women..

if you are thinking of marrying them, be prepared to marry their mother.

I have a friend who is 21 and serious with his 20 year old girlfriend. They are living together while she is in school and he is trying to work. As a bonus, her mother lives with them (not the other way around) and says she will for the rest of her life. They arent even married and there is no compromise.

There is a strong sense of family in latin cultures so buyer beware.
- August 31st, 2009, 02:20 pm
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meanminicooper meanminicooper is offline
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followmesky wrote :
[i]

Perhaps the answer is, like the African Americans, Hispanic Americans have been struggling against discrimination and poverty, lack of education, and low economic power. Despite these, many notable Hispanic Americans and African Americans have established as a formidable force in the fields of entertainment, sports, politics, science, business and education, well you get the picture. Well, as a result, they may feel they can best relate with African Americans and or Hispanics, though, its ignorant to say as we are not all the same. It seems to me they are only seeing their picture, the smaller picture, the stereotypical picture. But it may be their safest.
As you know the Hispanic American culture is as pervasive as the African American culture. Hispanic American food, dances and music are now as equally appreciated and accepted by the general public.
The united states is making a transition from predominantly white culture to one that is increasingly culturally diverse.
The reason why poor financial status and economics have affected Latinos is a strong driving towards family values at all costs. Whereas the values of european familes focus on wealth, success and stability, latinos as a whole generally place a greater emphasis on the family unit and a strong catholic belief of being fruitful.

An anglo male is successful among his peers if he makes 100K and drives a beemer.
A Latin male is successful if in the eyes of his mother, he found a good woman, had a lot of kids and can do just enough for them.
- August 31st, 2009, 02:27 pm
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Da_Love_Guru wrote :
Well my Amiga, I was saying: "What is your name, My name is ******, "Your eyes are beautiful" , hug me, kiss me."

I would not say such things out of the blue - but I would say many many things. And I would not say them all at once. I would say each word when you were ready. You would ask me to say such things - with your eyes. I would only be granting your wish. I am, after all, a gentleman.
To help you out Guru, this is what you wanted to say...

Como se llama? Mi nombre es______. Sus ojos son preciosos, abrazame y regalame un beso...

Or in the words of one famous Costa Rican rocker, Jose Capmany,
"Kiss me a kiss, baby!"
- August 31st, 2009, 02:37 pm
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meanminicooper wrote :
Any advice for men who date latin women..

if you are thinking of marrying them, be prepared to marry their mother.

I have a friend who is 21 and serious with his 20 year old girlfriend. They are living together while she is in school and he is trying to work. As a bonus, her mother lives with them (not the other way around) and says she will for the rest of her life. They arent even married and there is no compromise.

There is a strong sense of family in latin cultures so buyer beware.
Yeah....this happened to your friend, so I guess everyone else can expect the same thing.
- August 31st, 2009, 03:43 pm
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Allie_gator Allie_gator is offline
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I am a hispanic woman, As some of the things I've read here, well yeah, Hispanic families are tight. So are italian familes, and polish, and russian, and most miniorities I've known and met in my life. I came from NY, where diversity was and is still large, and Family was what kept people together.

As for these experiences from people, they are somewhat isolated to those individuals in my opinion. Yeah there are similarities with other people, but they are not all the same.

Doesn't mean that when someone meets a hispanic woman or man that the problems will be the same. As for families who call "white" folks gringo, that their can be friendly or disrespectful, depending on how it's used.

The one situation with the mother living with the girl, is a case of this young girl not stepping up to her mother. That is also the case of the young man getting to know the type of woman he will be with. Just because one puts their hand in the sand doesn't mean the situation will smooth away. These are signals to watch for in a mate period.

I know many successful hispanic men, one being my brother, who is very well off. And not all hispanics are Catholic. I still have a strong sense of family, but, my life is still my own, and I make of it what I create in my life. Good, Bad, and the ugly!

My family just adds to the spice of my life.
As for the comment of "buyer beware", I shake my head to that. People are not objects. I am hispanic, Puerto Rican, and having a sense of pride of who you are and where your going is a good thing, not a bad thing. All races should know who their are as well as who their family was. That does not stop a person from being rich or not, it only makes that person stronger in knowing who they are. Which will help them in life, in whatever endeavor they choose for themselves. This of course is my opinion.

*gets off her little soap box*
.
- September 18th, 2009, 10:44 am
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