I have pretty much given up. The last match I got from EH and actually had a 16 month relationship with (if it can be called that) ended up being an emotionaly unavailable man. I have to admit that the whole thing was painful and I did not learn there was such a thing as an EUM until after it was over.
Learn to live and like to be by yourself and things may happen on their own. It is scary out there, people have way too much baggage.
I have pretty much given up. The last match I got from EH and actually had a 16 month relationship with (if it can be called that) ended up being an emotionaly unavailable man. I have to admit that the whole thing was painful and I did not learn there was such a thing as an EUM until after it was over.
Learn to live and like to be by yourself and things may happen on their own. It is scary out there, people have way too much baggage.
You are right - we should all be able to live with and by ourselves. You are also right in saying that people have baggage - don't you?
There are all kinds of people out there, both men and women - some of them are good, others are not so good from where we see it, and yet there are others that are simply phenomenal.
But how are you going to find that phenomenal man if you choose to give up?
Do you think it may be worth re-considering your decision, pretty much?
I have been reading some of the posts and it seems like a good place to ask about something I'm having doubts about trying "yet" again joining EH.
I have been a member (on and off) of EH for almost five years now. I'm 65 and have had no real success yet in meeting someone and if I do they are not what they posted. I let my membership go because I guess I have pretty much given up. After all that time I feel that I have just wasted money.
I had a gastric by pass when I was 59 and have loss over a 140 pounds. I'm a size 8 and I'm told I'm not too bad on the eyes. I have had some surgeries to remove some of the excess skin. I can do so much more and have saved myself from some of the problems I would have had if I stayed fat.
The problem is once I tell someone I was on the heavy side I never hear from them again. So I guess I have just lost confidence in finding someone who will understand and not "LOOK" for perfection.
Thanks for letting me blow off some steam.
Last edited by silverfoxladie4; July 25,2009 at 4:47pm.
I have been reading some of the posts and it seems like a good place to ask about something I'm having doubts about trying "yet" again joining EH.
I have been a member (on and off) of EH for almost five years now. I'm 65 and have had no real success yet in meeting someone and if I do they are not what they posted. I let my membership go because I guess I have pretty much given up. After all that time I feel that I have just wasted money.
I had a gastric by pass when I was 59 and have loss over a 140 pounds. I'm a size 8 and I'm told I'm not too bad on the eyes. I have had some surgeries to remove some of the excess skin. I can do so much more and have saved myself from some of the problems I would have had if I stayed fat.
The problem is once I tell someone I was on the heavy side I never hear from them again. So I guess I have just lost confidence in finding someone who will understand and not "LOOK" for perfection.
Thanks for letting me blow off some steam.
Not exactly on topic, but a valid question...
In my not so humble opinion, save that discussion for a later time... Keep in mind there is no such thing as Internet "DATING"... what EH and the other online sites offer is Internet introductions...
Like all human interactions, there is a period of questions and answers, of learning... When the time is right, you will know it... I'm no expert, but just use common sense... NO ONE wants entire medical history right from the get go... Wow 'em with your wit and wisdom... There is plenty of time to take the baggage down and sort out what you need to reveal and what can be saved for a later date...
As far as rejoining EH, that is a personal decision... Most of us here have been or still are members and the opinions will run to the extremes...
Good luck and don't give up... in keeping with the thread, keep a positive, open mind...
Thanks Dac;
Until I get to know someone I don't really mention the fact that I had that surgery.
I'm not really giving up I guess I'm just having a mini pity party. Thanks for the advice.
Thanks Dac;
Until I get to know someone I don't really mention the fact that I had that surgery.
I'm not really giving up I guess I'm just having a mini pity party. Thanks for the advice.
You are most welcome...
And welcome to eHA... feel free to join any of the groups that you have interest in and to ask questions... NONE of us are experts... For the most part we are all in that "been there, done that" boat...
This article was a good read. Being positive and remaining positive carries us far. I have found a number of ladies that appear to be a good fit for me, but the chances get to zero when they will not respond to my starting communicating, or closing for reasons that cannot be determined until after you get to know them some what. But it is their loss.
Being by myself allows me to go fishing when I want, read when I want, even go watch barrel racing which I had to give up. Being positive does help us get through the down times. Having health problems can really get one down, but again, being positive will keep us have a positive outlook.
The tennis ball story is a good analogy, RD, and that's how I interpret "gut feeling" -- a conclusion/sense of something that's a thought, not a feeling; though it will have feelings associated with ... –
Sassafras54
Agree. Given where you are emotionally, I would cease all communication with Mr. Trade Show. You're vulnerable. He's up for a challenge. It's playing with fire. You'll be in a bad place in the ... –
emma_hazards
I have never spoken to a woman like he has.
Yeah, I have never spoken to a woman like that either.
It is a hard call to whether he is just as jerk, or whether he is a player.
Both are feasible ... –
ScottK
Harmonygirl,
I do not usually make up my mind on blanket situations but instead would examine each one on it's own merits, so I cannot answer your question. However, just in the going about of daily ... –
Ephemera
I was ok until the kiss on the cheek part....That doesn't sound like your defenses were up at all...
It's one thing for a guy to walk up and start with the cheesy lines....But as soon as I say, "no ... –
Ingytravel
No. It is not wise.
You have to throw all your eggs into one basket for love to work at all. Relationships are inherently riskier than careers. You can't use the same rules.
You might lose ... –
harnomygirl
Do you have something completely stupid to talk about? Come here. Talk. It's a simple two step process. Please have a good sense of humor about all this. It is good for the heart.
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The past is done, the future is uncertaint, the present is a gift.
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sez ... its hard to be pithy when there is no one to pith with...
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sez ... its hard to be pithy when there is no one to pith with...
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sez ... its hard to be pithy when there is no one to pith with...
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The tennis ball story is a good analogy, RD, and that's how I interpret "gut feeling" -- a conclusion/sense of something that's a thought, not a feeling; though it will have feelings associated with ... – Sassafras54
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Agree. Given where you are emotionally, I would cease all communication with Mr. Trade Show. You're vulnerable. He's up for a challenge. It's playing with fire. You'll be in a bad place in the ... – emma_hazards
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