I need help with finding a girlfriend.

So tell me guys. How do i become someone who girls could never reject for a date by being who i am?

Short Answer: By becoming someone you can really like and love, yourself.

Longer answers below.

Also, there were other things i was wondering.

1. With what i have said here, am i better off seeign a shrink about this?
No, you'd be better off listening to the late Michael Jackson, looking in the mirror and seeing all the great things about yourself, before others can see them too, but only after you show them who you really are.

2. What do i need to do to stop getting rejected for a date all the time.
See above. And also, if you do not like any of your measurements - assuming they can be changed, go ahead and work on that, but not to attract girls, but because you want it for yourself. The added confidence and a better self-image can only help in attracting the right girl.

3. It's been so long since i have been on a date, what do i do when i am on a date and where do i take a girl?
Take her somewhere you really love to visit yourself, somewhere you feel comfortable, where you can make her feel comfortable and at ease too. Then play it by ear and enjoy!


4. Rejection happens, it's part of life, and it hurts even the best of us. The trick to dealing with rejection is understanding that she just wasn't the right one (same goes for job interviews). The right one will see through all the facades and appearances into the person that you are, and she'll want to be with that person, and even help that person deal with any and all objective problems in his life. And better yet, you'll want and need to help her in return.


Rejection can also be seen as a positive - it brings you one step closer to the person (or even the job) that is right for you. Concentrate on that.


And crying is not all that bad either - it's the quickest and most inexpensive way to get rid of toxin build up in your system. It only feels bad at first. Go to sleep for a few hours, dream of peaceful sunsets, and you'll wake up all refreshed, and maybe even smiling, if you get really lucky!

Any help would be appreciated.

Always a pleasure.

I think IceCreamMoon gave beautiful advice. Building your confidence and self esteem is paramount to finding happiness with another person. I see that you want to be accepted for who you are, as we all do, but do you accept yourself? Are you content to be unemployed and overweight? If so, how do you fill your free time? Is it proactive/ productive? What is necessary for you to achieve a sense of pride and accomplishment? Self love will help provide a buffer in the face of rejection. Knowing that you are worth consideration and affection will make it easier to say, "Their loss."

Unless a medical condition prevents you from working or losing weight, I would suggest exercising! Not for the physical benefits, but for the psychological ones. Exercise simply makes a person feel stronger, more competent, and better able to tackle the daily challenges of life as they crop up. Also, it's a great distraction and all those feel good endorphins do wonders for depression.

If you suspect that you might be experiencing a clinical depression, however, talking to a therapist might be a good idea. Little in life is truly as bad as it seems, but when depression mounts it can be difficult to cure with mere positive thinking. Sometimes, pulling yourself out of a funk requires a combination of therapies- exercise, healthy living, expanding your interests and hobbies, and finding coping skills/support from a trained professional.

If there is nothing you want to change, then stick to your guns. The right girl WILL come along and she will be able to see the best in you!

Wow. Thanks. Yea i forgot to mention that i would also like to get a girlfriend before it's too late to become a father myself (sure i could be a guardian for a single mother's kids, but then again, my mom and dad would not get any grandkids if my next girlfriend does not want to have kids, or any more kids).

Always a pleasure.