Although there may be frustration at times over these issues - Remember one key thing...

...There are so few people who really have their act together on the inside in how they are really able to relate to the opposite sex - that if you really get truly healed up on the inside and get "on a roll" with your ability to connect to the opposite sex...

...Man, there's hardly any competition!!!

Here's something to think about. (no matter how I say this - it's gonna sound bad but for the sake of my point - I'll say it anyways)

Back in my twenties I was unusually good looking, got approached to model by photographers at times, could've bounced a quarter off of any part of my body, etc. But I was a retard and hadn't figured out who I was as a man - and how to really relate to women in the relaxed and enjoyable way that I can now. Now, I am just an average looking guy I suppose, my wife says I'm handsome - and that's all that matters. I don't have a six pack any more - I am probably 25 pounds overweight and my stomach is definitely NOT flat anymore.

Back in my early twenties I was lonely and unsuccessful in relationships - now, I'm married - but besides being married I have plenty of attention from the opposite sex still - and have to diligently ward off temptation. Point is - I was way better looking back in the day - but I was unsuccessful at love and lonely - now I know what I am doing and even though I don't look anything near to what I did back in the day - I find women respect me and are attracted to me.

Though it's absolutely true that people are much more likely to be attracted to certain kinds of attributes visually - what closes the deal - is how you know how to be - how you use what you've got.

Getting into shape is a serious consideration if you are looking for a mate - it certainly doesn't hurt your chances if a guy is not only attracted to you as a great gal - but is also sexually attracted to you as well.

Please don't get mad at me for saying what a guy really thinks girls - I thought that was what this article was all about! - Honest answers about this issue from guys!

In terms of who gals and guys are "looking for" - the following article can help a person realize the benefits of getting in shape - but who someone "finds" is almost always different than what they were looking for.

So take heart, and surrender to love when it finds you!


Here's a Wikipedia article that talks about it...

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Physical_attractiveness

Determinants of female physical attractiveness

The beauty of Maud Gonne (pictured here ca. 1900) was enough to drive the poet William Butler Yeats half mad.
Features such as a symmetrical face, full lips, and low waist-hip ratio are commonly considered physically attractive when part of a female, because they are thought to indicate physical health and high fertility to a potential mate. The determinants of female physical attractiveness include those aspects that display health and fitness for reproduction and sustenance. These include correlates of fertility such as youth,[14] waist-hip ratio,[15] mid upper arm circumference,[16] breast size,[17] breast symmetry,[18] body mass proportion[19] and facial symmetry.[20][21]

Signals of youth
Because female fecundity typically declines after the late twenties, youth is an important aspect of physical attractiveness[22]. One study across 37 cultures showed men desire, on average, a woman 2.5 years younger than themselves for a wife, with men in Nigeria and Zambia at the far extreme, desiring their wives to be 6.5 to 7.5 years younger. As men age, they also desire a larger age gap from their mates.[14] The reasons for this preference are currently debated.
This preference for youth has also led to a preference of neotenic and youthful-appearing features. Fair hair, perky breasts, [23] full, red lips,[24] clear, smooth skin, clear eyes, lustrous hair, and good muscle tone are all viewed as attractive in women.[14]

Breast size
Full breasts may be attractive to men in Western societies because women with higher breast to under-breast ratios typically have higher levels of the sex hormone, estradiol, which promotes fertility. [25]
Larger breasts also display the aging process more noticably, hence they are an "honest" indicator of long-term fertility.[26]

Proportion of body mass to body structure
Social ideals of body proportions can change. This 1895 advertisement promotes a weight gain product.
The Body Mass Index (BMI) is another important universal determinant to the perception of beauty.[19] The BMI refers to the proportion of the body mass to the body structure. However, the optimal body proportion is interpreted differently in various cultures. The Western ideal considers a slim and slender body mass as optimal while many historic cultures consider an embonpoint or plump body-mass as appealing.[27][28] Men do not appear to have evolved to hold a particular build as more attractive, but rather to be drawn to whichever build associates with social status.[28]

However, it should be noted that, in the United States, women overestimate men's preferences for thinness in a mate. In one study, American women were asked to choose what their ideal build was and what they thought the build most attractive to men was. Women chose slimmer than average figures for both choices, though when American men were independently asked to choose the female build most attractive to them, they (the men) chose figures of average build, indicating that women may be misled as to how thin men prefer women to be.[28]

The attraction for a proportionate body also influences an appeal for erect posture.[29]

Waist-hip ratio
Main article: waist-hip ratio
Notwithstanding wide cultural differences in preferences for female build, scientists have discovered that the waist-hip ratio (WHR) of any build is very strongly correlated to attractiveness across all cultures.[28] Women with a 0.7 WHR (waist circumference that is 70% of the hip circumference) are usually rated as more attractive by men from European cultures. Such diverse beauty icons as Jessica Alba, Marilyn Monroe, Salma Hayek, Sophia Loren, and the Venus de Milo all have ratios around 0.7.[30] In other cultures, preferences vary,[31] ranging from 0.6 in China,[32] to 0.8 or 0.9 in parts of South America and Africa,[33][34][35] and divergent preferences based on ethnicity, rather than nationality, have also been noted.[36][37]

Height
Most males exhibit a preference for females of shorter physical stature than themselves.[38][39] Women .7 to 1.7 standard deviations below the mean in height are the most reproductively successful. One possible explanation is that shorter females may reach sexual maturity earlier than their taller counterparts. An alternative explanation is that since most men demonstrate a preference for women shorter than themselves, being shorter allows a woman access to a larger potential dating pool.