Do Men Really Want a Successful & Educated Woman?


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neardc is offline neardc Post #191  July 9,2009, 2:22pm
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W0LF wrote :
For men at large? No, they don't want a successful or Educated woman. No, it has nothing to do with intimidation at all. Men find beauty and charisma intimidating, there is no aspect of education of success that threatens a man as the vast majority of them feel they have as much of both as they need. Men just have no use for those qualities in a partner. Successful women are stereotypically emotionally draining and physically unavailable. They tend to use their career as a barrier to avoid commitment or confrontation. They're needs are very refined and they don't have time to take care of their partners needs. Educated women are stereotypically very sensitive about their accomplisments and intellect. Despite being very educated about fact and theory they suck at instinct and empathy, they are argumentative, short-temperred, self-rightous. Weather you follow the stereotypes of either promoting yourself as Successful or Educated doesn't bring up any kind of positive experience for a man. Men do want a partner who will share their load financially and they do want someone that challenges their intellect but they've been tot he mountains of Sucessful and Educated women and they're not lining up to go back.
I guess the only thing to do, then, is to wish you all the best in finding yourself an uneducated and unsuccessful woman...

(I do think you may have set a record for the greatest number of negative stereotypes in a single post, though! )
 
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Atlguy38 is offline Atlguy38 Post #192  July 9,2009, 6:21pm
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I didn't read all these replies, so this may have already been said. Of course, I'm new to the dating scene after 7 years with the same woman. I never thought I'd be single again, so this is going to be new to me. But for me, it is a requirement that the woman I'm with have a career. Of course, in my current situation, I don't have one, so thats going to be an issue for women. That might make me hesitate as well. But when I was employed, I liked dating professional, independent women. I think its a turn on. I wouldn't be intimidated. Maybe I'm the exception.
 
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Carolinaaba81 is offline Carolinaaba81 Post #193  July 9,2009, 10:12pm
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I have found that once I tell a man that I have a mortgage and that I own my car, POOF they seem disappear. One guy told me that he felt as if he had nothing to offer me. That he wanted to make me proud and was going to start to look for a place. I don't get it either, I thought a MAN would be proud of a successful woman. I guess they weren't men. And, it just wasn't meant to be???
 
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30mikemike is offline 30mikemike Post #194  July 10,2009, 7:24am
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Men love successful women in a relationship if they feel secure in their own abilities.

However men flee at warp factor 10 when some of these women try to throw this success in their face like a 6 year old teases a playmete about having more toys than anyone. Note the empahsis on the age group there because so often succesful people of any gender have a tendency to lack the poise and security of self and must constantly refer to it like a child.

And remember glory is fleeting. Pride goeth before the fall and careful what you do on the way up cause you might regret the bad stuff on the way down.
 
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JDavid is offline JDavid Post #195  July 10,2009, 3:01pm
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Is anyone talking about "success" in terms other than money, status and a high paying job?

Is anyone talking about "education" as something other than years of schooling and/or degrees (or job credentials)?
 
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jayjay is offline jayjay Post #196  July 10,2009, 3:03pm
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...things seem to have gotten quiet around here.

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30mikemike wrote :
However men flee at warp factor 10 when some of these women try to throw this success in their face.
Wow. That's really fast.
 
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waltercl is offline waltercl Post #197  July 10,2009, 8:05pm
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dietpepsi wrote :
My experience has been that the more successful the man, the more he cares about my looks and the less he cares about my education and success. Why? Because he's so full of himself that he only wants a hot chick.

I had one executive who "worshipped" me for my brains, beauty, eclectic interests, and free-spirit -- only to later hook up with a dumb, boring, and high-maintenance but cute flight attendant while high-flying.

Men are liars. Watch out for their sweet talk.

On the other hand, I have also dated some very educated but less successful men - namely curious and adventurous scholars with no money - and this group really likes brainiacs.
I think this post fits perfectly what onlyjeeps was saying above. Someone has a negative experience, and they then project that experience onto the entire opposite sex. They begin looking for it in their subsequent dates and experiences, and of course they find it.

It is an old cliche, but it is very true, life is 10% what happens to you and 90% how you react to what happens to you. Men are not bad, and women are not bad, but if that is your belief then you'll continuously be drawn to those that will prove your point.

I think it has been said over and over again on this thread, and yet it still doesn't seem to get through. Most men are not turned off by a woman's success or intelligence. There might be personality traits and attitudes that come with that success for some, but that would be up to the individual and how they present themselves. Just being intelligent and just being successful is not going to turn off most men. I would see it as a plus and find it desirable.
 
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bigfincat is offline bigfincat Post #198  July 10,2009, 8:46pm
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Money can change people & often in very negative ways. Sometimes people have changes in attitude without even realising it.

I am by no means suggesting that all successful & educated women experience negative changes in personality but some do & it is not pretty. Money does not have to change someone but that saying did not come about on its own.
 
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123noname789 is offline 123noname789 Post #199  July 11,2009, 2:07am
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Edmondo wrote :
OK there is a mix of subjects here.

Having a degree is nice but does not always mean success or all around intelligence.

I have met physicist who had PhD’s but yet were barely making it. Bill Gates does not have a degree. When Steve Jobs ran Apple neither did he. I went out with a high school teacher with multiple degrees but lacked critical thinking and had no clue of current events.

I had met a woman ran a hospital. When we went out she barked orders like she was still doing her job. It seemed that most conversations almost bordered on arguments. And yet she wondered why she intimidated men. It reminds me of something my dad once told me; it’s nice to be important but more important to be nice.

I my self would love to met someone intelligent and successful but still be a compassionate human being.
Some interesting comments Edmondo...I would echo your sentiments. Men may not be as such intimidated by intelligent women, but repelled by brash argumentative ones. A couple of ladies I've dated of late, had this point about wanting an intelligent man. Aside from formal schooling which is clear, they themselves often had an answer for everything with double the opinions, never would mutter an 'I don't know,' and very disrespectful of a different point of view, which they saw as 'ignorant.' They also tended to ware their careers on their sleeves, and saw the world through that experience. One woman was a manager at a medical clinic, and had brash opinions on the medical field. She didn't take well challenges that she was NOT a medical doctor, but rather a manager (a less charitable way of putting it, would be 'paper shuffler'). Another, who was less brash and boastful, worked an assistant for a law firm (criminal), and would base most of her societal views on this one experience, where she has been at for only two years. Here again, she herself wasn't a lawyer and had relatively little experience of that profession outside that one office.

Speaking as a college grad myself (BA), I do agree with intelligence and schooling or lack there of, they aren't connected. I am impressed by what those with little formal education, can accomplish and with their conversationalist abilities. Further, their educated counterparts can often be so narrowly focused that they can not carry on a conversation which drifts from their area of expertise. That being said, in the working world, if you are going to work for someone else professionally, fair or not, they want the sheep's skin.

To the OP...I went to your profile, and not what I was expecting. Not a bad thing, I had just formed an impression or guess about you which I found incorrect in your self description. Good luck in your search.
 
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avinash is offline avinash Post #200  July 11,2009, 3:25am
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jayjay wrote :
Wow. That's really fast.
technically at warp factor 10 they exist at every point in the universe at once.

yes i'm a nerd
 
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