How long do you take to determine if you have chemistry?


View Poll Results: How many dates does it take you to determine physical chemistry/attraction?
1-2 dates 106 73.10%
3-5 dates 34 23.45%
6-10 dates 3 2.07%
10+ dates 2 1.38%
Voters: 145. You may not vote on this poll

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stevex is offline stevex Post #51  July 14,2009, 11:06am
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When_I_See_You_Smile wrote :
You're right, Steve. The ability to talk to each other, is indeed part of the big picture.
And it has to be more than just ridiculous small talk. I was with my ex for nearly a year and I just don't think we really had that great of conversations. I have lady friends who I can talk to for hours and we actually have very interesting conversations about the meaning of life wondering if god is really real or if there is some doubt, and is it the chicken and the egg time or are we just yolks.
 
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PoliticalChick01 is offline PoliticalChick01 Post #52  July 14,2009, 11:28am
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For me, finding out if the chemistry is there is either from the first few minutes to first date.

People are different when talking to them over the phone and email to meeting them up for the first time in person. So if their mannerisms or attitude make me feel comfortable or they are cracking jokes and are funny like they were over email and the phone then I will be intrigued.

For the most part if things are going well, chemistry for me all boils down to the first kiss. If the spark and fireworks are there then the chemistry will be there, but if the kiss is sloppy, horrible, they have bad breath, whatever, then that is a total turnoff for me.

Very rarely have I gone out on a second date with someone if I wasn't feeling it the first time around.
 
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When_I_See_You_Smile is offline When_I_See_You_Smile Post #53  July 14,2009, 11:29am
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When_I_See_You_Smile wrote :
You're right, Steve. The ability to talk to each other, is indeed part of the big picture.
stevex wrote :
And it has to be more than just ridiculous small talk. I was with my ex for nearly a year and I just don't think we really had that great of conversations. I have lady friends who I can talk to for hours and we actually have very interesting conversations about the meaning of life wondering if god is really real or if there is some doubt, and is it the chicken and the egg time or are we just yolks.
I agree. Meaningful, intelligent conversation is extremely important. I could never be with someone I couldn't talk to.
 
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oprlvr is offline oprlvr Post #54  July 14,2009, 10:05pm
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This is right about accurate. I recently "met up" with two non EH prospects and neither had chemistry with me. Talk about disappointing. Many times, the Chemistry is discovered in relationships we already have that we somehow didn't see before
 
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ddonned920 is offline ddonned920 Post #55  July 15,2009, 4:03am
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Chemistry is such a non tangible thing. I think it's on that first meet that you know, and it stems from the physical attraction. What I may find attractive may not be the same for the next person. With that said, I did continue to see someone that it was not there on that first meet because I did enjoy his company and as it turned out we have been together for more than a year. And we do have that chemistry now.
 
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HonestGal is offline HonestGal Post #56  July 15,2009, 4:19am
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Depends - sometimes slowly is best - those full on bursts peter out quickly I've learnt from experience!
 
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Grace0119 is offline Grace0119 Post #57  July 15,2009, 9:05am
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I find the "chemistry" in the conversation so it doesn't take long. I would rather date a brilliant, witty, guy that I can have interesting and stimulating conversations with that is not conventionally "attractive" than the "hot guy" any day. And... I think over time, the former lasts longer than the latter.
 
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BoazBride is offline BoazBride Post #58  July 15,2009, 8:12pm
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At end of first date, you will know if you have 'chemistry.'
We met on-line and I thought I might like him ... but not completely sure. Then, when each drove 125 miles and met face-to-face, he didn't look exactly like I expected... but still good.
Then our date time allowed us to talk a lot. I think we liked each other more then. And, at the end of the date, since we were going opposite directions (250 miles apart), he suggested a good night kiss before we each drove away - just to 'see if we had chemistry.' Well, we knew we did then. It took a year to work out the logistics, and we have married a year now. WE were right: We do have 'chemistry.':-)
 
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When_I_See_You_Smile is offline When_I_See_You_Smile Post #59  July 18,2009, 9:26am
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BoazBride wrote :
At end of first date, you will know if you have 'chemistry.'
We met on-line and I thought I might like him ... but not completely sure. Then, when each drove 125 miles and met face-to-face, he didn't look exactly like I expected... but still good.
Then our date time allowed us to talk a lot. I think we liked each other more then. And, at the end of the date, since we were going opposite directions (250 miles apart), he suggested a good night kiss before we each drove away - just to 'see if we had chemistry.' Well, we knew we did then. It took a year to work out the logistics, and we have married a year now. WE were right: We do have 'chemistry.':-)
Congratulations!
 
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kellycichocki is offline kellycichocki Post #60  July 19,2009, 4:18pm
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For some people, online dating is not the best way to meet people. Many people make a connection with a person when they first meet, and take things from there.

I don't care how accurate some dating websites claim to be as far as determining the best match for a person. The bottom line comes down to chemistry with that person! I am not a superficial or shallow person by any means, but that's often the determining factor as to whether a relationship will develop or not. Meeting someone face to face, exchanging a few words at that moment, will often determine chemistry. Why waste time being pen pals on a dating website, talking for hours on the phone, or even emailing when the big even arrives and it is all for naught...no chemistry!! I have seen this happen time and again with my friends.

Let me meet a man first, and I will know without the help of online dating sites if I feel that all important word: chemistry!!! Good luck to those of you this dating website does place you with that "right" person!
 
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