Why is it acceptable for men to want 'pretty' women, but not for women to want wealthy men


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cj4 is offline cj4 Post #41  June 13,2009, 2:33pm
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It is perfectly acceptable for women to want successful men. That is the way it has been for ages....
 
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tbesq is offline tbesq Post #42  June 13,2009, 2:59pm
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cj4 wrote :
It is perfectly acceptable for women to want successful men. That is the way it has been for ages....
And I think for the longest time, it was acceptable for men to want attractive women too, and women who would play second fiddle to them. But that has changed over the last 40-50 years, while the expectations for men in a relationship haven't changed. Women have more options; men's options haven't really changed. I don't think it upsets the balance of life that much, but if you're mentioning one side (your post) you have to mention the other side as well to complete the picture.
 
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CreolePrincess is offline CreolePrincess Post #43  June 13,2009, 3:08pm
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It is so complicated, ya'll, and it doesn't even have to be.

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tbesq wrote :
And I think for the longest time, it was acceptable for men to want attractive women too, and women who would play second fiddle to them. But that has changed over the last 40-50 years, while the expectations for men in a relationship haven't changed. Women have more options; men's options haven't really changed. I don't think it upsets the balance of life that much, but if you're mentioning one side (your post) you have to mention the other side as well to complete the picture.
Women have more options of what? Men?
 
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Bandmate is offline Bandmate Post #44  June 13,2009, 3:09pm

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cj4 wrote :
It is perfectly acceptable for women to want successful men. That is the way it has been for ages....

Provided they have the ...ASSets to do so
 
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ez170 is offline ez170 Post #45  June 13,2009, 3:10pm
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bwr wrote :
I officially declare war on golddiggers
He has a point. Gold Digger is a disparaging term for a person, usually a woman, who knowingly manipulates someone for their financial gain.

Women are attracted to different things then men are. Some women are attracted to power and wealth. There is nothing wrong with this, but there is something wrong with "Gold Diggers". Personally, I don't think it's right to take advantage of someone's good nature and use it for personal gain.

For me, physical attraction is important but that's it. Either you're attracted or you aren't.
 
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tbesq is offline tbesq Post #46  June 13,2009, 3:15pm
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CreolePrincess wrote :
Women have more options of what? Men?
Whether a woman would choose to earn income right along with the man or play a more "traditional" role with the man shouldering the financial responsibility, society in general is accepting of either choice. There are some men out there who are looking for sugar mommas, or don't earn in a relationship (requiring the woman to shoulder the financial burden), but I believe society generally frowns on that.

But I will caveat: In a situation in which a couple is about to have children or has children, in an ideal situation, the woman should be able to stay home full-time as a mother if she chooses. In truth, it's really up to each individual couple to decide what type of financial/career arrangement works.
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CreolePrincess is offline CreolePrincess Post #47  June 13,2009, 4:09pm
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I see what you're saying, but in truth, many women don't have a choice. Back in the day when women stayed at home, they were married at a younger age. Many men aren't wanting to get married young (even if women are). But also, most times it takes two incomes to run a household. So, it's not a lot about choice but about necessity and reality. And also, sometimes when I woman chooses to stay home, it's looked upon negatively. (e.g.., she's a golddigger).
 
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LereleiLee is offline LereleiLee Post #48  June 13,2009, 4:59pm
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CreolePrincess is right - this is about the pot calling the kettle black.

Aren't you silly. Don't you know that a girl being pretty is like a man being rich. You wouldn't marry a girl just because she's pretty, but my goodness, doesn't it help?
 
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tbesq is offline tbesq Post #49  June 13,2009, 5:03pm
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CreolePrincess wrote :
I see what you're saying, but in truth, many women don't have a choice. Back in the day when women stayed at home, they were married at a younger age. Many men aren't wanting to get married young (even if women are). But also, most times it takes two incomes to run a household. So, it's not a lot about choice but about necessity and reality. And also, sometimes when I woman chooses to stay home, it's looked upon negatively. (e.g.., she's a golddigger).
I don't believe most people would consider a woman who is staying home to take care of young children a gold digger. As for when to get married, I think men -- as the expected initiators of the dating process and marriage -- should get married when they're ready to accept that commitment. I would agree that a two-income household is more of a necessity these days. Sometimes when a woman chooses to stay home it's looked upon negatively, but I don't think it gets as much disapproval as a man who does the same.
 
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tbesq is offline tbesq Post #50  June 13,2009, 5:08pm
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LereleiLee wrote :
CreolePrincess is right - this is about the pot calling the kettle black.

Aren't you silly. Don't you know that a girl being pretty is like a man being rich. You wouldn't marry a girl just because she's pretty, but my goodness, doesn't it help?
I would agree with your comparison in an abstract sense. But I personally don't believe that a woman being pretty is exactly like a man being rich. There are definitely steps the average woman can take to look more attractive, and I think those steps are easier than what a man must accomplish to become rich. I would agree with your comparison in an abstract sense. Yes, physical attraction probably helps with attraction, just as a man's income -- while not the sole factor -- probably helps in determining compatibility.
 
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