Doodler is offline Doodler Post #11  June 10,2009, 4:12pm
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If she wanted to date you, she could have said "Well, I don't date my clients,... Jane Doe is a very good trainer, you might like her... Maybe you'd like to get a new trainer?"
 
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CreolePrincess is offline CreolePrincess Post #12  June 10,2009, 4:44pm
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It is so complicated, ya'll, and it doesn't even have to be.

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Why not be direct about it> Now, doing so, you will have to accept whatever the outcome is good or bad.

Tell her you would like to talk to her. Make it brief. Tell her you like working with her but she knows that you're interested in her. Reassure her that you completely understand about not wanting to mix business with pleasure, and would she consider going out with you get another trainer. Make sure that you stress there isn't any pressure for her to go out with you. Inform her that if the answer is no, that you still would like to work with her as a trainer unless it makes her too uncomfortable. Just have an open dialogue.

The worse is that she says no and you loose a trainer. But the alternative of not knowing is probably worse than rejection. And there's always the change that she will say yes.
 
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angelofmerci is offline angelofmerci Post #13  June 10,2009, 9:37pm
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I agree with Creole Princess' approach to your situation. I know that as a nurse I have had some really flirty patients but I know where to draw the line. Your trainer told you no most likely knowing if she said yes and then things did not work out she would lose you as a client and lose the income. Good luck
 
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txbubba is offline txbubba Post #14  June 11,2009, 6:17am

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she's being paid to be nice to you, to continue having you as a paying customer.

right now, she's the one in the position of control and power. if she does date you, then that control over you is lost.

i bet you're not the only customer she's nice to
 
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DancingFool is offline DancingFool Post #15  June 11,2009, 7:16am
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You put her in a very uncomfortable situation. Being nice and flirtatious with you is part of her job description and something that's generally understood. When you decided to take it seriously and asked her out, you broke the rules so to speak. Initially she told you yes, she'll go because she was concerned that directly rejecting you to your face would also lose you as a client and deprive her of income. She then texted you no thanks when it was a little more removed and not so in your face and also not something where you can stand in front of her and argue the point.

If she really truly wanted to date you, she actually would, but she does not. So leave it be and let it go. I suspect that if you push things you'll lose a trainer and a friend.
 
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simonevans is offline simonevans Post #16  June 11,2009, 11:04am
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Okay. Thanks a lot for your input everyone. Looks like I've got some thinking to do, lol. Some great ideas in here, I'll have to try them out!
 
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