Advice and Support from Thousands of Users Just Like You

Dating First-date jitters? Hoping for a second date? Moving on to a full blown relationship? Share your journey and advice here.

Reply
 
LinkBack Thread Tools
ssluvtravel's Avatar

Join Date: Jun 2009

Posts: 1

See profile

Hi everyone. I'm a 31 yrs old girl that been living a single life for 3 years and loving it. I traveled , partying, having fun and not worrying about marriage at all.
Well until recently, I had a wake up call and realizing that all my good friends are moving on with their life. Either settle down having a family or in serious relationship.

So for having lots of time for myself recently, it leads me to have deep thinking and questions back about values and life. (Not that I'm scared to be alone, I actually enjoy having time for myself)
But yes, I do get lonely sometimes. And the truth, I start have the feeling of 'wanting' to share something with someone special. And I think its time for me to open my heart again.

However, the problem is, its hard for me to meet good quality guys these days. Either they're taken or I have no chemistry with.
How do I find/ meet people?

So, I thought online dating is not a bad idea. Nonetheless, I'm pretty new with this Online dating things and honestly I'm afraid of whats out there.

Before I commit to Online dating, I would like hear some opinions from anyone that willing to share with me.

So please be free to let me know what you guys have in mind or experiences. Gladly appreciated.
- June 7th, 2009, 02:30 am
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!Share on Facebook

#1   Reply With Quote
outlaw1's Avatar

outlaw1 Time for the phalanx to go back to work...

Virtuoso

Join Date: Jan 2009

Posts: 3,834

See profile

Find a man who shares some of your hobbies. Per online dating-be proactive and initiate contact.
Stay away from negative people who trash online dating and/or men. That will affect your attitude & search.

Don't rush into marriage because you feel like "it's time to get married." I did that and made a big mistake. There are some good women, keepers on online dating. Good luck.
- July 4th, 2009, 02:38 pm
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!Share on Facebook

#2   Reply With Quote
D_Lion's Avatar

D_Lion - Ladies want to wring my neck - you have been warned!

Sage

Join Date: Aug 2008

Posts: 10,346

See profile

ssluvtravel wrote :
I'm pretty new with this Online dating things and honestly I'm afraid of whats out there.

I'm out there. Therefore, it has to be good, right?
- July 4th, 2009, 02:42 pm
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!Share on Facebook

#3   Reply With Quote
Wonderwoman402's Avatar

Enthusiast

Join Date: Jan 2009

Posts: 667

See profile

I have met a lot of quality men online (not on eHarmony, who rarely gives me matches, but on other sites) that I never would have met in any other way as it is unlikely that our paths would have ever crossed. I have also met a few guys who creeped me out. But... you can come across guys like that in "real life," too... and the chances of coming across a real creep in a bar seem higher than online to me.

As I won't date anyone from work, I already know all the guys at my small church, and won't just hang out in a bar to meet guys, it is rare that I meet any "eligible bachelors" outside of online sites.

Actually, I think it is safer to meet someone online, as you can get to know them a bit before actually meeting. Just be sure you always have a safety/out lined up on a first date... a girlfriend who you can call from the bathroom and say "call me and give me an excuse to get away from this guy!" And make sure you check in with a friend at the end of the date so they know you got home safely. Drive yourself to meet him at a public place... don't let him pick you up for the first date. You probably won't meet "the one" on the first time out, so be patient and try to have fun in the process!
- July 4th, 2009, 03:24 pm
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!Share on Facebook

#4   Reply With Quote
theweave's Avatar

Quick Study

Join Date: Jan 2008

Posts: 126

See profile

Well in my opinion, there must some success in online dating or no one would sign up for their services would they??

I am on Eharmony and Match.com and have had dates from both. I had a six month relationship with someone from Eharmony as well. So I can say, yes you can meet people on dating sites. I agree with the previous poster that said it is sometimes easier online because you can get to know someone before you meet them and I think that breaks tension there on the first date!

Dating is not an easy thing to do, you just basically go by trial and error and hope in the end you find someone that you do click with and who you want to be with!

Good luck!
- July 4th, 2009, 04:20 pm
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!Share on Facebook

#5   Reply With Quote

ADVERTISEMENT

wordwoman's Avatar

wordwoman is in contemplation

Quick Study

Join Date: Mar 2009

Posts: 221

See profile

Online dating is just another tool in the box as you search for the man for you, especially if the things you're presently doing aren't generating the desired outcome.

As for me, I've met and dated men on eH, I wouldn't have met or dated otherwise, so it has been a good thing. The quality of the men has been decent, and the flow has been fairly constant, which is all I ask of such a service.

BTW, a close friend who is exactly your age listened and watched as I dated eH guys, and then she decided to join herself. Within two months, she met the guy who is now her boyfriend; they went to the same high school; he was senior when she was freshman. The world moves in mysterious ways.
- July 4th, 2009, 07:37 pm
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!Share on Facebook

#6   Reply With Quote
nathanmc19's Avatar

Join Date: Jul 2009

Posts: 2

See profile

I personally think it is worth it... like someone above has said... it's another way of trying to find the right person for you. I always have figured the more ways the merrier... especially considering how big the internet really is. Really broadens your choices.
- July 4th, 2009, 07:47 pm
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!Share on Facebook

#7   Reply With Quote
simpletonHeart70's Avatar

simpletonHeart70 hopes for better weather.

Enthusiast

Join Date: Jan 2009

Posts: 801

See profile

wordwoman wrote :
Online dating is just another tool in the box as you search for the man for you, especially if the things you're presently doing aren't generating the desired outcome.

As for me, I've met and dated men on eH, I wouldn't have met or dated otherwise, so it has been a good thing. The quality of the men has been decent, and the flow has been fairly constant, which is all I ask of such a service.

BTW, a close friend who is exactly your age listened and watched as I dated eH guys, and then she decided to join herself. Within two months, she met the guy who is now her boyfriend; they went to the same high school; he was senior when she was freshman. The world moves in mysterious ways.

I would agree with this. I think online dating works better for some, just like some people are better suited for meeting people at church and others at bars, etc.

To have success, imho, you have to be able to attract people with an online profile. Some people just aren't photogenic and that is a huge liability. People who may have no problems meeting people IRL may not attract people online. And vice versa. Some people attract many suitors because they are extremely attractive online. And maybe not so much IRL.

I wouldn't say online is any better or worse than dating IRL. It depends on the person. Too many think it will be better and often isn't.


- July 4th, 2009, 08:21 pm
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!Share on Facebook

#8   Reply With Quote
Gr8Guyn2008's Avatar

Gr8Guyn2008 I wanna know what love is, I want you to show me

Power Poster

Join Date: Jan 2008

Posts: 9,128

See profile

D_Lion wrote :
I'm out there. Therefore, it has to be good, right?
Me too
- July 4th, 2009, 09:29 pm
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!Share on Facebook

#9   Reply With Quote
Gr8Guyn2008's Avatar

Gr8Guyn2008 I wanna know what love is, I want you to show me

Power Poster

Join Date: Jan 2008

Posts: 9,128

See profile

I have met a lot of quality men online (not on eHarmony, who rarely gives me matches, but on other sites) that I never would have met in any other way as it is unlikely that our paths would have ever crossed. I have also met a few guys who creeped me out. But... you can come across guys like that in "real life," too... and the chances of coming across a real creep in a bar seem higher than online to me.

As I won't date anyone from work, I already know all the guys at my small church, and won't just hang out in a bar to meet guys, it is rare that I meet any "eligible bachelors" outside of online sites.

Actually, I think it is safer to meet someone online, as you can get to know them a bit before actually meeting. Just be sure you always have a safety/out lined up on a first date... a girlfriend who you can call from the bathroom and say "call me and give me an excuse to get away from this guy!" And make sure you check in with a friend at the end of the date so they know you got home safely. Drive yourself to meet him at a public place... don't let him pick you up for the first date. You probably won't meet "the one" on the first time out, so be patient and try to have fun in the process!
I mostly agree with this advice. Except that eHarmony is the place that I have gotten matches that were interested in meeting. I had no luck with several other sites. eHarmony works best for some, other sites work best for others.
- July 4th, 2009, 09:32 pm
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!Share on Facebook

#10   Reply With Quote

ADVERTISEMENT

Reply

Bookmarks

Thread Tools

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts
BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is On
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are On

Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
Dating more than one person at a time christianlife Dating 19 June 10th, 2009 07:45 am

Latest on our Dating Advice Discussion Boards

“It's a guideline that lenders used to follow quite closely, but haven't been so much in recent years with some more creative financing options...lol. But, the idea is that housing shouldn't consume ... ” – meri75

Join the “Five Myths of Divorce, CS, and Custody in the USA” discussion

“He won't acknowledge you as his girlfriend and he is living with another woman with whom he adopted a kitten? Why do you think you made a mistake kicking him to the curb? I think what you did was ... ” – nightling

Join the “He wouldn't Commit so I Left; Now I think I made a Mistake” discussion

“I think we expect people to be honest, kind, funny, gentle, and loving. When those we love end up not being like that it surprises us because we expected them, of all people, to be one above all ... ” – OverAnalyzer

Join the “How to find out what's in your baggage!” discussion

“Okay, you said it... John 20: 10-18 10Then the disciples went back to their homes, 11but Mary stood outside the tomb crying. As she wept, she bent over to look into the tomb 12and saw two angels ... ” – chawks64

Join the “Hide it in your heart” discussion

“*W_R_O_N_G!* How could you possibly know that. Why didn't you end the date then? Why did you kiss her goodnight? Why did you pursue her afterward? Talk about mixed signals and bad presumptions. ... ” – WeDesignOurLives

Join the “Saturday Date Leaves Me Dazed and Confused???” discussion

“ I recommend pondering me!” – D_Lion

Join the “Saturday Night Plans...” discussion

“ Lack of trust and the lack of his personality warmth to win you over is your thing, so you need to find out why? If not drop out and try a Match Maker. You actually need to continue the e mail ... ” – nightling

Join the “Frozen solid” discussion

“ You cracked me up too; that was definitely a smooth one.” – AutumnJoy

Join the “Hybrid thread: 'baggage' and 'age'” discussion



All times are GMT -7. The time now is 05:45 pm.


Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.1
Copyright ©2000 - 2009, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
Search Engine Friendly URLs by vBSEO 3.3.0