is online dating a good idea?


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ssluvtravel is offline ssluvtravel Post #1  June 7,2009, 12:30am
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Hi everyone. I'm a 31 yrs old girl that been living a single life for 3 years and loving it. I traveled , partying, having fun and not worrying about marriage at all.
Well until recently, I had a wake up call and realizing that all my good friends are moving on with their life. Either settle down having a family or in serious relationship.

So for having lots of time for myself recently, it leads me to have deep thinking and questions back about values and life. (Not that I'm scared to be alone, I actually enjoy having time for myself)
But yes, I do get lonely sometimes. And the truth, I start have the feeling of 'wanting' to share something with someone special. And I think its time for me to open my heart again.

However, the problem is, its hard for me to meet good quality guys these days. Either they're taken or I have no chemistry with.
How do I find/ meet people?

So, I thought online dating is not a bad idea. Nonetheless, I'm pretty new with this Online dating things and honestly I'm afraid of whats out there.

Before I commit to Online dating, I would like hear some opinions from anyone that willing to share with me.

So please be free to let me know what you guys have in mind or experiences. Gladly appreciated.
 
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outlaw1 is offline outlaw1 Post #2  July 4,2009, 12:38pm

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Find a man who shares some of your hobbies. Per online dating-be proactive and initiate contact.
Stay away from negative people who trash online dating and/or men. That will affect your attitude & search.

Don't rush into marriage because you feel like "it's time to get married." I did that and made a big mistake. There are some good women, keepers on online dating. Good luck.
 
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D_Lion is offline D_Lion Post #3  July 4,2009, 12:42pm
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ssluvtravel wrote :
I'm pretty new with this Online dating things and honestly I'm afraid of whats out there.

I'm out there. Therefore, it has to be good, right?
 
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Wonderwoman402 is offline Wonderwoman402 Post #4  July 4,2009, 1:24pm
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I have met a lot of quality men online (not on eHarmony, who rarely gives me matches, but on other sites) that I never would have met in any other way as it is unlikely that our paths would have ever crossed. I have also met a few guys who creeped me out. But... you can come across guys like that in "real life," too... and the chances of coming across a real creep in a bar seem higher than online to me.

As I won't date anyone from work, I already know all the guys at my small church, and won't just hang out in a bar to meet guys, it is rare that I meet any "eligible bachelors" outside of online sites.

Actually, I think it is safer to meet someone online, as you can get to know them a bit before actually meeting. Just be sure you always have a safety/out lined up on a first date... a girlfriend who you can call from the bathroom and say "call me and give me an excuse to get away from this guy!" And make sure you check in with a friend at the end of the date so they know you got home safely. Drive yourself to meet him at a public place... don't let him pick you up for the first date. You probably won't meet "the one" on the first time out, so be patient and try to have fun in the process!
 
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theweave is offline theweave Post #5  July 4,2009, 2:20pm
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Well in my opinion, there must some success in online dating or no one would sign up for their services would they??

I am on Eharmony and Match.com and have had dates from both. I had a six month relationship with someone from Eharmony as well. So I can say, yes you can meet people on dating sites. I agree with the previous poster that said it is sometimes easier online because you can get to know someone before you meet them and I think that breaks tension there on the first date!

Dating is not an easy thing to do, you just basically go by trial and error and hope in the end you find someone that you do click with and who you want to be with!

Good luck!
 
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wordwoman is offline wordwoman Post #6  July 4,2009, 5:37pm
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Online dating is just another tool in the box as you search for the man for you, especially if the things you're presently doing aren't generating the desired outcome.

As for me, I've met and dated men on eH, I wouldn't have met or dated otherwise, so it has been a good thing. The quality of the men has been decent, and the flow has been fairly constant, which is all I ask of such a service.

BTW, a close friend who is exactly your age listened and watched as I dated eH guys, and then she decided to join herself. Within two months, she met the guy who is now her boyfriend; they went to the same high school; he was senior when she was freshman. The world moves in mysterious ways.
 
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nathanmc19 is offline nathanmc19 Post #7  July 4,2009, 5:47pm
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I personally think it is worth it... like someone above has said... it's another way of trying to find the right person for you. I always have figured the more ways the merrier... especially considering how big the internet really is. Really broadens your choices.
 
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simpletonHeart70 is offline simpletonHeart70 Post #8  July 4,2009, 6:21pm
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wordwoman wrote :
Online dating is just another tool in the box as you search for the man for you, especially if the things you're presently doing aren't generating the desired outcome.

As for me, I've met and dated men on eH, I wouldn't have met or dated otherwise, so it has been a good thing. The quality of the men has been decent, and the flow has been fairly constant, which is all I ask of such a service.

BTW, a close friend who is exactly your age listened and watched as I dated eH guys, and then she decided to join herself. Within two months, she met the guy who is now her boyfriend; they went to the same high school; he was senior when she was freshman. The world moves in mysterious ways.

I would agree with this. I think online dating works better for some, just like some people are better suited for meeting people at church and others at bars, etc.

To have success, imho, you have to be able to attract people with an online profile. Some people just aren't photogenic and that is a huge liability. People who may have no problems meeting people IRL may not attract people online. And vice versa. Some people attract many suitors because they are extremely attractive online. And maybe not so much IRL.

I wouldn't say online is any better or worse than dating IRL. It depends on the person. Too many think it will be better and often isn't.


 
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Gr8Guyn2008 is offline Gr8Guyn2008 Post #9  July 4,2009, 7:29pm
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D_Lion wrote :
I'm out there. Therefore, it has to be good, right?
Me too
 
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Gr8Guyn2008 is offline Gr8Guyn2008 Post #10  July 4,2009, 7:32pm
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I have met a lot of quality men online (not on eHarmony, who rarely gives me matches, but on other sites) that I never would have met in any other way as it is unlikely that our paths would have ever crossed. I have also met a few guys who creeped me out. But... you can come across guys like that in "real life," too... and the chances of coming across a real creep in a bar seem higher than online to me.

As I won't date anyone from work, I already know all the guys at my small church, and won't just hang out in a bar to meet guys, it is rare that I meet any "eligible bachelors" outside of online sites.

Actually, I think it is safer to meet someone online, as you can get to know them a bit before actually meeting. Just be sure you always have a safety/out lined up on a first date... a girlfriend who you can call from the bathroom and say "call me and give me an excuse to get away from this guy!" And make sure you check in with a friend at the end of the date so they know you got home safely. Drive yourself to meet him at a public place... don't let him pick you up for the first date. You probably won't meet "the one" on the first time out, so be patient and try to have fun in the process!
I mostly agree with this advice. Except that eHarmony is the place that I have gotten matches that were interested in meeting. I had no luck with several other sites. eHarmony works best for some, other sites work best for others.
 
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