I feel like the kid that doesn't understand the rules in peewee soccer


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Ron2758 is offline Ron2758 Post #1  June 3,2009, 6:37pm
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Ok I'm a halfway decent guy. I'm 25 I live alone, steady job, college degree and average looks. I'm a bit of a goofball, comedian and I like my video games. No real skeletons in my closet either (seems to be that's the video games if anything).



But that's the face I'm making with dating overall, not just eharmony. I never seem to say the right thing or call too soon, too late. I get the vibe that the girls close to my age on here just want either a perfect guy or are just on here to get their self esteem up. I've had very few solid rejections and instead I get a lot of just no calls/e-mails/silence. Is this really the wrong site for younger folks? A lot of the successes seem to be older (as in older than me) people.

I'm really at a loss, is this what other people feel like? I don't see many single girls when I go out to the bars or clubs. I havefound married women sans rings which is pretty annoying. A lot of people assume I'm married which is NOT the vibe I want to give off if I'm single.

So if you couldn't tell... I really am the guy that just doesn't understand the rules to the game.
 
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cp30 is offline cp30 Post #2  June 3,2009, 6:51pm

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you seem fine. Dating means being open to rejection....and internet dating is that x 500 it seems. You just run into more flakes, more people that are just testing it out....maybe even checking up on their husbands....pretending to be someone else, etc.

How bad are the video games? yeah that can be a hang up if it is something you do nightly. But that is with anything. Do you have room in your life for a woman?

You seem funny, that will get you far with the ladies....just don't get too discouraged.
 
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Ron2758 is offline Ron2758 Post #3  June 3,2009, 7:06pm
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Well I've been around guys who won't even look away from their computer screens while a cute girl tried to talk to them. Those guys have had drastically better luck than me. One guy is younger than me by a couple years and he's engaged.



As for me... sometimes I play for hours on end and sometimes I don't play for a month or two. It really depends on how free my schedule is. I can't play video games when I'm tired otherwise I'm out like a light.... same goes for meetings at work.
 
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cp30 is offline cp30 Post #4  June 3,2009, 7:13pm

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well....just because he is engaged doesn't mean that much. She might not know the seriousness of his habit yet. I had a friend who married a guy like that. They are now divorced.

I dated a guy who was similiar...it wasn't video games it was sports. It was all he could talk about...think about....live for. Definitley more interested in that than girls. I think I was actually his only real girlfriend...ever. He is still single. I still talk to him occasionally. I think its just the way he is wired. Great guy, just not a lot going on there to keep a girl interested. sports, poker, and the other guys were always his priority. He treated me well... but it was pretty boring and I didn't feel we could connect on a deeper level.

Anyway, well you don't seem like that guy, so why did I tell that story. Oh, probably because your friends are more like that guy, and they probably latched onto the first girl that they figured would put up with them and either not require them to either change....or the girl still has no clue.

ps. you are only 25
 
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meanminicooper is offline meanminicooper Post #5  June 3,2009, 7:37pm
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As a US soccer referee, I'll explain the rules.

you have to realize that at 22-28 a lot of guys and girls can get by on what they can flaunt, their good looks, parents' money and similarly, people feel they can hold out for what they think might be perfection.

They also have time and wont bog themself down with a commitment because they have a whole life to live, so why get involved with someone.

being genuine and sincere with someone will score you a lot of points when you are 40. It wont get you very far with most women your age
 
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Ron2758 is offline Ron2758 Post #6  June 3,2009, 8:34pm
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The only 2 options I see then are:

1) Use the new car to catch a younger girl
2) Go out with older women
 
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Oregon_Coast_Guy is offline Oregon_Coast_Guy Post #7  June 3,2009, 8:53pm
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How well do you do socially?
 
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Ron2758 is offline Ron2758 Post #8  June 3,2009, 9:10pm
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Great if it's more than just 1 on 1 with a girl I like.
 
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IcecreamMoon is offline IcecreamMoon Post #9  June 3,2009, 9:57pm
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meanminicooper wrote :
As a US soccer referee, I'll explain the rules.

you have to realize that at 22-28 a lot of guys and girls can get by on what they can flaunt, their good looks, parents' money and similarly, people feel they can hold out for what they think might be perfection.

They also have time and wont bog themself down with a commitment because they have a whole life to live, so why get involved with someone.

being genuine and sincere with someone will score you a lot of points when you are 40. It wont get you very far with most women your age
Whilst there is some truth to that, not everybody plays by those rules. I still remember being 25 Sincerity, a great sense of humor and a good education rated much higher with me than his parent's wealth. I find nothing admirable about flaunting something you have not achieved by your own merit. I'm not saying it can't be fun, but it's certainly not a deciding factor. Quite a few of my married friends started dating in their early to mid-20's and were married by the age of 30. They worked together towards getting that cool car.

Ron2758 wrote :
So if you couldn't tell... I really am the guy that just doesn't understand the rules to the game.
Welcome to the world of Dating
Most of us here are a little older and have a few relationships under our belts, but we are still struggling to understand the rules...

My suggestion would be to expand your social circles and find new friends, who can introduce you to other friends, and so on. Also, make friends with girls - even if it doesn't work out with her, she probably has some single girlfriends you could meet. You always hear single girls complaining about the lack of good guys and vice versa. There are plenty of nice single girls out there looking for someone like you, you just need to find them. Good luck!
 
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scarlet13 is offline scarlet13 Post #10  June 4,2009, 12:02am

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Ron2758 wrote :
The only 2 options I see then are:

1) Use the new car to catch a younger girl
2) Go out with older women
Date older women. there are a lot of 30 pluses looking to date younger guys nowadays.
 
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