What is your league?

I don't really have that hard of a time finding people who are attracted to me. I'm pretty attractive, intelligent and have a terrific sense of humor. I don't think of people in terms of leagues and, unless I'm getting a red flag from someone, will give just about anyone who expresses interest in me a chance. If one were to look at photographs of all the people I've had relationships, one would be hard pressed to find a type. They vary completely in size, shape, and level of physical attractiveness.

The "league" problem comes into play when I'm dating someone who thinks of himself as being below me, even if I don't think he is. If someone questions whether or not he deserves someone like me, we're gonna have issues. I don't feel like I can ever have an "off" day where I'm not feeling like my usual affectionate and perky self because, despite the fact that I say upfront, "FYI I'm having a rough day and am not feeling up for much conversation and cuddles, it has nothing to do with you" I end up having to reassure the person that it has nothing to do with him, which, when my resources are already tapped, is extremely annoying.

People who think of themselves as below you are just waiting for the inevitable sign that will confirm that you are out-of-their-league.

I find the following analogy useful in these circumstances:

Say you are a fisherman. You get a tug on your line and manage to wrestle this awesome fish into your boat. You hold up your catch and pose for a picture. Are you:

A) thinking, "This is incredible! I didn't know there were fish this big in this lake!

or

B) thinking, "Wow! I can't believe me of all people caught a fish like this! I didn't think I had it in me!"

Anyone who answers B might end up seeing you as validation of his self-worth, rather than just a really cool person that he is happily surprised to find and connect with. Thus far, dating the B types has not worked out well for me because they don't see me for me, but rather what I mean to how they see themselves. I'm getting the sense this is happening right now with someone I genuinely like and it makes me sad and frustrated. I've told him that I'm pretty direct and that if I have a problem with something he's done, I'll tell him, so that if I'm "off" or really busy and can't see him and haven't told him he's done something to make me upset, he can rest assured that it has nothing to do with him, but this doesn't seem to be having an impact.