fluffypuddles is offline fluffypuddles Post #1  May 23,2009, 7:29pm
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I joined EHarmony about a month ago and about 3 weeks ago a guy (not the only one) requested to communicate through GC. We got to OC in about a week and have been sending 2-3 (usually between 800-1600 words) page messages to each other everyday. So far we've talked alot about important beliefs like our theology, etc... (which for the most part we agree on) besides sharing prayer requests with each other and talking about our everyday life. We live several states away from each other so maybe that's why this is the case, but I would really like to start talking on the phone (but don't want to be the one to initiate this). Based on how much he's writing to me and things he's said about how much he looks forward to my messages I'm wondering why he hasn't asked to talk on the phone yet. Any ideas? Do y'all think he's just stringing me along and is doing the same thing with several other people? It's getting really hard not to think about him and I'm really like alot of things about him. I'm not very good at telling whether a guy likes me or not and have never had a boyfriend before. What should I do?
 
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Tyym is offline Tyym Post #2  May 23,2009, 7:38pm
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fluffypuddles wrote :
I joined EHarmony about a month ago and about 3 weeks ago a guy (not the only one) requested to communicate through GC. We got to OC in about a week and have been sending 2-3 (usually between 800-1600 words) page messages to each other everyday. So far we've talked alot about important beliefs like our theology, etc... (which for the most part we agree on) besides sharing prayer requests with each other and talking about our everyday life. We live several states away from each other so maybe that's why this is the case, but I would really like to start talking on the phone (but don't want to be the one to initiate this). Based on how much he's writing to me and things he's said about how much he looks forward to my messages I'm wondering why he hasn't asked to talk on the phone yet. Any ideas? Do y'all think he's just stringing me along and is doing the same thing with several other people? It's getting really hard not to think about him and I'm really like alot of things about him. I'm not very good at telling whether a guy likes me or not and have never had a boyfriend before. What should I do?
I'd say that the chances are pretty good that if he's communicating with you as regularly as you say... he's interested.

He may well be in the same boat as you in that he may not be able to read you well enough yet.

Follow a pace you're comfortable with.... given the timeframe you mention and that you're interested in talking with him... chances are he's into it too.

Drop a couple of hints about a conversation... here's a good suggestion... ask him if he's heard of Skype... (you might want to check it out too). Since you live a couple of states apart, you'll like the fact that it's completely free between two computers and the audio quality is awesome! The nicest benefit for you is that you don't have to reveal your telephone number before you're completely satisfied that you really want him to have it.

Best of luck and welcome to eHarmony Advice.
Tim
 
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daffodil26 is offline daffodil26 Post #3  May 25,2009, 5:49pm
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I've been an eHarmony member on and off. This is the third time I'm joining. I rejoined March 27, 2009. I am one of those people who barely dated as a teenager (wasn't allowed by strict parents) and just really never was into the dating scene thereafter because it is only now that I'm ready--at 35 years old. I've had some bad experiences here already but it had to do with being such a novice online dater. I didn't take heed eHarmony's advice about guys who want to move fast and communicate out of eHarmony right away by sending their personal emails. I communicated with one guy that way lasgt year and it lead to a nightmarish experience--now I'm much better at reading "WARNING SIGNS". Those men who remain patient and understand that women are most sensitive to being cautious are the guys who are true gentlemen. I have heard a lot of good things from other people who've actually met their special someone here so, here I am again, trying for the third time in hopes of finding the gentleman for me. It may have taken me such a long time to be ready for a relationship but this big step is also new and exciting--and yes, quite overwhelming and scary. I just hope that eHarmony can truly help me in finding a compatible match.
 
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