Confused on how to proceed


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MQRegan is offline MQRegan Post #1  April 15,2009, 12:14pm
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So I met this girl online. Went out twice and we talk almost daily. Its been a few weeks since I seen her, due to her schedule, not mine; but we still talk almost daily. I brought up this morning that I wondered why she was still logging in to her dating account (its on a site where it shows the time they last logged in). She told me it wasn't a big deal and I should not concern myself about it. She only logs in late at night to check messages and such. However, today she logged in during the day and she was matched up with a friend of mine and she did ask him if he wanted to talk on the phone. He of course out of respect to me declined once he showed me this girls pic/profile and asked my thoughts. None the less, she basically brushed it off. Said it was none of my business and it should not concern me. But then she logs into her account during the day today. She also told him in an e-mail that she was not in a relationship with anyone yet. Yet, last week, she was telling me (over the phone) that she was at her hairdressers getting highlights or whatever and was telling the hairdresser that she is seeing something (I assume that is me, though it has been a few weeks) and that I am very understanding about her scheduling difficulties. I know she is not out on Friday's and Saturday's cause she calls me from home to talk. I am usually out with friends though.


I understand the difference from seeing a person and a real realtionship, but if someone you are "seeing" asks you questions you about logging in and you continue to do it, what does that say? On one part, I want to just say listen I met someone else and I am going to take my chances with her. Just to move on. On the other hand, I do still like her. Completely perplexed here.


Any ideas?
 
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tweet37 is offline tweet37 Post #2  April 15,2009, 12:24pm
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Dude,


She is interested in someone else and too busy to see you?? What's that tell you?
 
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wpr101 is offline wpr101 Post #3  April 15,2009, 12:25pm
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It sounds like she is hedging her bets... heavily, lol.


I wouldn't look at her login dates anymore, it's only going to make you more suspicious and worried. Don't you have to login also to check her dates?


I'd try playing it cool, and hopefully she will realize she likes you more than the rest of the bums she is meeting online. Not much else you can do in this scenario, imo.
 
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MQRegan is offline MQRegan Post #4  April 15,2009, 12:31pm
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Tweet, then why did she tell me she really liked me? Why keep calling me and talking to me if she has no interest in me? Wpr understandable conclusion.. Due to the meeting up thing, I said it ain't working and said we should part ways. She said you know I have a heavy schedule, but I do really like you. I (she) would like to see where it goes. See the mixed signals I am talking about??
 
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boccabum is offline boccabum Post #5  April 15,2009, 12:39pm
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MQRegan, wrote :

So I met this girl online. Went out twice and we talk almost daily. Its been a few weeks since I seen her, due to her schedule, not mine; but we still talk almost daily. I brought up this morning that I wondered why she was still logging in to her dating account (its on a site where it shows the time they last logged in). She told me it wasn't a big deal and I should not concern myself about it. She only logs in late at night to check messages and such. However, today she logged in during the day and she was matched up with a friend of mine and she did ask him if he wanted to talk on the phone. He of course out of respect to me declined once he showed me this girls pic/profile and asked my thoughts. None the less, she basically brushed it off. Said it was none of my business and it should not concern me. But then she logs into her account during the day today. She also told him in an e-mail that she was not in a relationship with anyone yet. Yet, last week, she was telling me (over the phone) that she was at her hairdressers getting highlights or whatever and was telling the hairdresser that she is seeing something (I assume that is me, though it has been a few weeks) and that I am very understanding about her scheduling difficulties. I know she is not out on Friday's and Saturday's cause she calls me from home to talk. I am usually out with friends though.


I understand the difference from seeing a person and a real realtionship, but if someone you are "seeing" asks you questions you about logging in and you continue to do it, what does that say? On one part, I want to just say listen I met someone else and I am going to take my chances with her. Just to move on. On the other hand, I do still like her. Completely perplexed here.


Any ideas?
Dude seriously. With all due respect. Unless you're seeing her on a regualar basis and have had an explicit discussion on the monogomy of your "relationship", she is correct. It is none of your business and you have no right questioning who she speaks with, dates, flirts with, the number of times she logs on, or any other aspect of her life.


Rethink how you have reacted and realize you've done the fast track lesson on how to get a girl to dump you. Ladies, same goes for you if you pull this stuff.


"Any ideas?". yes. Apologize to her, learn your lesson here, and find another girl(s) to go on dates with.
 
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MQRegan is offline MQRegan Post #6  April 15,2009, 12:41pm
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boccabum,579454 wrote :


MQRegan, wrote :


So I met this girl online. Went out twice and we talk almost daily. Its been a few weeks since I seen her, due to her schedule, not mine; but we still talk almost daily. I brought up this morning that I wondered why she was still logging in to her dating account (its on a site where it shows the time they last logged in). She told me it wasn't a big deal and I should not concern myself about it. She only logs in late at night to check messages and such. However, today she logged in during the day and she was matched up with a friend of mine and she did ask him if he wanted to talk on the phone. He of course out of respect to me declined once he showed me this girls pic/profile and asked my thoughts. None the less, she basically brushed it off. Said it was none of my business and it should not concern me. But then she logs into her account during the day today. She also told him in an e-mail that she was not in a relationship with anyone yet. Yet, last week, she was telling me (over the phone) that she was at her hairdressers getting highlights or whatever and was telling the hairdresser that she is seeing something (I assume that is me, though it has been a few weeks) and that I am very understanding about her scheduling difficulties. I know she is not out on Friday's and Saturday's cause she calls me from home to talk. I am usually out with friends though.


I understand the difference from seeing a person and a real realtionship, but if someone you are "seeing" asks you questions you about logging in and you continue to do it, what does that say? On one part, I want to just say listen I met someone else and I am going to take my chances with her. Just to move on. On the other hand, I do still like her. Completely perplexed here.


Any ideas?


Dude seriously. With all due respect. Unless you're seeing her on a regualar basis and have had an explicit discussion on the monogomy of your "relationship", she is correct. It is none of your business and you have no right questioning who she speaks with, dates, flirts with, the number of times she logs on, or any other aspect of her life.


Rethink how you have reacted and realize you've done the fast track lesson on how to get a girl to dump you. Ladies, same goes for you if you pull this stuff.


"Any ideas?". yes. Apologize to her, learn your lesson here, and find another girl(s) to go on dates with.


Dump me? She called me this morning to confirm plans on Friday. Whether I go or not is another story.
 
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DDjr is offline DDjr Post #7  April 15,2009, 12:42pm
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Either you are not serious yet and then it's none of your business, or you are serious and you have a right to be concerned.


I think you imagine the relationship to be at one point and she at another.
 
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MQRegan is offline MQRegan Post #8  April 15,2009, 12:43pm
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Possibly DDjr. Probably should back off a bit. Take a week to re-organize and reconsider. Good way of looking at it.
 
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lucky173 is offline lucky173 Post #9  April 15,2009, 12:49pm
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You've gone out with her twice. TWICE. You shouldn't be checking her login, and you shouldn't be asking her questions. It is NONE of your business what she's doing, or who she is doing it with. She could be 'seeing' you and 'seeing' 10 other guys if she wanted to be. She could really like you and be interested and continue to call, and still, at this point, you've been out with her twice.


Seems she's even nicely given you some warning that you're coming close to crossing a line here, by having to tell you something is none of your business.


Get a clue, boccabum is right - THIS is exactly how to get a girl to dump you quick!
 
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lucky173 is offline lucky173 Post #10  April 15,2009, 12:51pm
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MQRegan,579462 wrote :

boccabum,579454 wrote :


MQRegan, wrote :


So I met this girl online. Went out twice and we talk almost daily. Its been a few weeks since I seen her, due to her schedule, not mine; but we still talk almost daily. I brought up this morning that I wondered why she was still logging in to her dating account (its on a site where it shows the time they last logged in). She told me it wasn't a big deal and I should not concern myself about it. She only logs in late at night to check messages and such. However, today she logged in during the day and she was matched up with a friend of mine and she did ask him if he wanted to talk on the phone. He of course out of respect to me declined once he showed me this girls pic/profile and asked my thoughts. None the less, she basically brushed it off. Said it was none of my business and it should not concern me. But then she logs into her account during the day today. She also told him in an e-mail that she was not in a relationship with anyone yet. Yet, last week, she was telling me (over the phone) that she was at her hairdressers getting highlights or whatever and was telling the hairdresser that she is seeing something (I assume that is me, though it has been a few weeks) and that I am very understanding about her scheduling difficulties. I know she is not out on Friday's and Saturday's cause she calls me from home to talk. I am usually out with friends though.


I understand the difference from seeing a person and a real realtionship, but if someone you are "seeing" asks you questions you about logging in and you continue to do it, what does that say? On one part, I want to just say listen I met someone else and I am going to take my chances with her. Just to move on. On the other hand, I do still like her. Completely perplexed here.


Any ideas?


Dude seriously. With all due respect. Unless you're seeing her on a regualar basis and have had an explicit discussion on the monogomy of your "relationship", she is correct. It is none of your business and you have no right questioning who she speaks with, dates, flirts with, the number of times she logs on, or any other aspect of her life.


Rethink how you have reacted and realize you've done the fast track lesson on how to get a girl to dump you. Ladies, same goes for you if you pull this stuff.


"Any ideas?". yes. Apologize to her, learn your lesson here, and find another girl(s) to go on dates with.


Dump me? She called me this morning to confirm plans on Friday. Whether I go or not is another story.
That just sounds now like you're playing games ?? Sounds like something a pouty woman would say
 
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