Incredibly slow communication.....


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Michael303 is offline Michael303 Post #1  April 14,2009, 7:44pm
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I'd say he's probably not that interested. Even if he was you'd have to ask yourself if you'd be happy with communicating with your partner like that or with someone who's that tied up with their career that much. At minimum you guys are a poor match when it comes to communication style.
 
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LizziePooh is offline LizziePooh Post #2  April 14,2009, 7:45pm

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So Marion - was last Saturday your second date? It sounded like you met in March and then again last week.


I would just give him time. With internet dating it is hard because you have different people at different stages of communication so it kind of leads to this long drawn out process.


I suggest you do not communicate again until he reaches out to you and keep communicating and meeting your other matches. It is just kind of how the edating process goes...


Good luck!
 
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bravethestorm is offline bravethestorm Post #3  April 14,2009, 7:55pm
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Since this slow communication has gone on for months...I would say this is probably typical style for him. If it is frustrating for you...that would signal different communication styles and priorities. You could talk to him about it and see what happens.


I think people get what they put into relationships...and if you're looking for this to go somewhere...he doesn't sound like a good bet. Odds are whatever he is "busy" doing is the higher priority in his life than developing a relationship with you.
 
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marions is offline marions Post #4  April 14,2009, 8:20pm
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So Marion - was last Saturday your second date? It sounded like you met in March and then again last week.


I would just give him time. With internet dating it is hard because you have different people at different stages of communication so it kind of leads to this long drawn out process.


I suggest you do not communicate again until he reaches out to you and keep communicating and meeting your other matches. It is just kind of how the edating process goes...


Good luck!


We've only met once. I reread my post and it did sound like we've met twice so I fixed it. Sorry about that..... We live 2 hours from each other so since he's too busy to write, he's also too busy to get together. Why would you even sign up for eH if you don't have time to date? I don't get it. Why waste the money?


I think you all are right. After the first week in May, work is really going to slow down for him so I'll probably try to keep communication until then. Of course, I'm not going to contact him unless he writes first. After that, if it's still slow, I'm giving up.


So,am I rightin thinking 5 or 6 days between emails is slow??? Or, am I just being impatient?
 
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marions is offline marions Post #5  April 14,2009, 8:21pm
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So, I was matched with a guy in January. He was slow at eH communication and blamed it on his job. This was understandable and I told him that it was ok as long as he wrote back. He always did.By February we hadexchanged email addresses and finally met around middle of March.


Communication has always been slow, usually between 3 and 6 days between emails. I consider this slow. Maybe I'm being impatient. I realize people are busy but I always make a point to write within two daysif I think it's important enough. Usually if I haven't heard from a guy within three days I write him off. However, since this guy said he was busy, was always slow before, and a very good match I decided to give him a chance. There was a week he was off work and he did write every day that week.


Anyhow, we met on a Saturday in mid-March. Date went well but he seemed nervous and obviously a little shy. I still didn't have any complaints though. I wrote him later that night to answer a question about something we talked about. He wrote back the next day and everything sounded good. But, after that I waited till Friday and still hadn't heard from him. I'd completely given up and written him off when lo and behold I get an email from him on Sunday, a whole week after his last email. He even asked me to write at his regular email address so I thought I must still be in the game since I graduated to the better email.


We've written each other a couple times since then but the last email I received from him was on Thursday and I thought I'd hear from him again over the weekend since it was a holiday.


I'm just getting frustrated and if this guy wasn't such a good match I would give up on him. This isn't the first time something like this has happened to me, although it wasn't via the internet, and there have been a couple times when I've written off men only to be told later that I shouldn't have given up so quickly because they were definitely interested. It's just that not calling/email = not really all that interested in my dating book.


What's a girl to do? Do men just not get it, or what? Or, are they really "busy?" I lead a busy life too ya know....
 
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PY is offline PY Post #6  April 14,2009, 8:29pm

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I personally like 24-48 hours turnaround when it comes to email communication. Huge majority of people have almost constant access to computer, internet, blackberry, etc...especially if that person puts 'meeting others' as one of the top priorities, but that's just me.


Just like Mike303 said....you guys may be incompatible in terms of communication style...
 
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boccabum is offline boccabum Post #7  April 14,2009, 8:33pm
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There are just way too many variables in email communicaiton: he might be working email so much from work that personal emails are just not a priority, bad internet connection, server down, etc...


What's wrong with picking up the phone and calling the guy once or twice a week???????
 
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all_seasons is offline all_seasons Post #8  April 14,2009, 8:42pm
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I'd hesitate to put too much energy into a relationship where it's obvious thatyou are not finding ways to get together.What fun is that? Don't do that to yourself!!! Geeze!
 
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Girlygirl00 is offline Girlygirl00 Post #9  April 15,2009, 6:05am
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5-6 days between emails is way too long for me. I can understand being busy at work, but if you know that you're communicating with someone you can take 5-10 minutes to send an email. Personally, that would drive me crazy and I would close him out...but I'm impatient like that.





GG
 
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tweet37 is offline tweet37 Post #10  April 15,2009, 8:52am
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Either he's busy communicating and dating other matches (which is what you should be doing too), or he's just not that into you.





Have you asked him if he's dating others? If not, why not?
 
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