Advice and Support from Thousands of Users Just Like You

Dating First-date jitters? Hoping for a second date? Moving on to a full blown relationship? Share your journey and advice here.

Reply
Page 1 of 12 1 2 3 11 Last »
 
LinkBack (1) Thread Tools
eharmonyadvice eharmonyadvice is offline
eharmonyadvice's Avatar

Moderator

Join Date: Oct 2007

Posts: 852

See profile

Why is it that many sensible and responsible women are attracted to 'bad boys?' What do otherwise conscientious and even conservative women see in rebels?
- April 8th, 2009, 03:33 pm
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!Share on Facebook

#1   Reply With Quote
veronicaphilly veronicaphilly is offline
veronicaphilly's Avatar

Newbie

Join Date: Apr 2009

Posts: 1

See profile



Most women don't like bad boys. They like confidence and a little dominance. And it just so happens a lot of bad seeds express confidence and dominance, but in really obnoxious ways.


We want aman thatis dominant and confident, but who will look out forus and not try to hurt us -- this is known as the alpha male.


So women get the bad guys who are just arrogant and good guys who are in control, confused, simply because they havesimilar alpha male traits.


I can't stand bad boys. They are bad for the heart, soul, and everything else. But give me a man that can be in control and not hurt me -- that is what I truly love.


- April 8th, 2009, 10:07 pm
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!Share on Facebook

#2   Reply With Quote
DiliDailDisneyFan DiliDailDisneyFan is offline
DiliDailDisneyFan's Avatar

Newbie

Join Date: Apr 2009

Posts: 1

See profile



Not all "bad boy" relationships are doomed! I married the rebel of his family and our relationship is fantatic. We have been married almost 13 years now and have known one another for a good 17 years. Open communication and acceptance keeps our relationship solid. Yes, even that once "bad boy" can mellow with age.
- April 10th, 2009, 04:31 am
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!Share on Facebook

#3   Reply With Quote
justadude justadude is offline
justadude's Avatar

Newbie

Join Date: Apr 2009

Posts: 1

See profile



I think women just want to feel safe and these guys seem to be strong. The only problem is if they are control freaks the women become just someone else to be controlled. If they have violent tendencies the results are very bad. I do not think these guys have unusually high testosterone. they are just self centered and lack self control. Maybe the more controlled guys have the same stupid impulses but more self control. I feel I do. Personality type plays into it a lot.
- April 10th, 2009, 07:23 am
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!Share on Facebook

#4   Reply With Quote
churumbeque churumbeque is offline
churumbeque's Avatar

Quick Study

Join Date: Dec 2008

Posts: 154

See profile



When I hear the phrase "he's too nice" what we mean is he is a push over. No such thing as too nice but those that lack confidence and do not offer a little challenge get boring quickly. So in general we want something to keep us intersted and guessing a little.
- April 10th, 2009, 11:48 am
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!Share on Facebook

#5   Reply With Quote

ADVERTISEMENT

tbesq tbesq is offline
tbesq's Avatar

Volunteer Community Leader

Join Date: Jun 2008

Posts: 3,309

See profile



Until women are comfortable in their own skin, they need a man who appears to be very comfortable in his. Once women get older and do reach that comfort level, they don't need a jerk. They do look for a man who is stable and would tend to be a provider/protector, but the emotional detachment and boorishness characteristic of many bad boys will be less attractive to them.
- April 10th, 2009, 11:55 am
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!Share on Facebook

#6   Reply With Quote
Parfy Parfy is offline
Parfy's Avatar

Newbie

Join Date: Mar 2009

Posts: 11

See profile



I think a lot of women confuse Emotional Maturity with Emotional Instability. That's why they end up with jerks that want to keep them on an emotion roller coaster ride.
- April 10th, 2009, 12:22 pm
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!Share on Facebook

#7   Reply With Quote
jayjay jayjay is offline
jayjay's Avatar

jayjay ...is back in the U.S.A.

Power Poster

Join Date: Jun 2008

Posts: 7,353

See profile

eharmonyadvice, wrote :

Why is it that many sensible and responsible women are attracted to 'bad boys?' What do otherwise conscientious and even conservative women see in rebels?
Perhaps it's that, for a lot of them, they really aren't 'sensible and responsible'. I was just talking with an elderly friend about her daughter, who has been involved on and off with a 'bad boy' for a number of years. He's been in and out of jail (currently has 3 outstanding warrants for his arrest). The daughter who is involved with this guy also has a drug problem of her own as well as some other emotional issues. While this young woman might like to consider herself 'sensible and responsible'...that probably isn't very accurate. Maybe the notion that 'sensible and responsible' women are attracted to bad boys isn't accurate. It might be that being attracted to this kind of guy indicates other issues, an addictive personality etc.
- April 10th, 2009, 12:51 pm
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!Share on Facebook

#8   Reply With Quote
33tomh 33tomh is offline
33tomh's Avatar

33tomh Call me Tom, Yes ... Tom Turkey, No ! LOL

Newbie

Join Date: Sep 2008

Posts: 21

See profile



OK...This is a VERYinteresting subject to me. In my eHarmony Profile, towards the end, I specifically state:


"Are YOU looking for lots of cool tattoos? Really weird piercings & crazy hair? An actual BAD BOY ?!? ---> I'm am NOT him !


What I AM is a real & regular guy. I promise No Games. If we don't have chemistry after meeting a time or two, I'll let you know that too, in a direct, gentle way...we'll again go our separate directions."


Maybe I should take that out -- Might be severely limiting the women who respond if they think I'm too boring, predictable or too much of a "Nice Guy" ?!?


Gives me lots to think about....


- April 10th, 2009, 02:08 pm
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!Share on Facebook

#9   Reply With Quote
D_Lion D_Lion is offline
D_Lion's Avatar

D_Lion - Ladies want to wring my neck - you have been warned!

Sage

Join Date: Aug 2008

Posts: 10,914

See profile

DiliDailDisneyFan wrote :

Not all "bad boy" relationships are doomed! I married the rebel of his family and our relationship is fantatic. We have been married almost 13 years now and have known one another for a good 17 years. Open communication and acceptance keeps our relationship solid. Yes, even that once "bad boy" can mellow with age.
Check it out! What are you doing on the dating website, then? Checking for an upgrade?
- April 10th, 2009, 02:17 pm
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!Share on Facebook

#10   Reply With Quote

ADVERTISEMENT

Reply
Page 1 of 12 1 2 3 11 Last »

Bookmarks

« Where are you in the 'dating' pool? | Array | Long Periods of Time Between Dates »
Thread Tools

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts
BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is On
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are On

LinkBacks (?)
LinkBack to this Thread: http://advice.eharmony.com/boards/dating-advice/dating/22676-4-reasons-women-attracted-to-bad-boys.html
Posted By For Type Date
Dating advice message board This thread Refback September 6th, 2009 02:53 pm

Latest on our Dating Advice Discussion Boards

“Lest we have forgotten it the crux of the OP:First ambiguous problem- met online... saw posting and set up a date or EH GC for a month then OC for another month?Second: I could hardly believe they ... ” – my5cents

Join the “Does a woman's financial well being, profession, and wage matter to the men?” discussion

“There's no such thing as "important dates." Treat someone in a way which is sustainable forever. I don't now, and surely never will, remember "dates." What's unsustainable about remembering ... ” – meri75

Join the “How "date oriented" (anniversaries, birthdays, etc) are you?” discussion

“ It has been 5 days since she didn't respond to my last e-mail. If my Saturday date doesn't go well I will probably e-mail her... but I figure after 5 days the match is dead.” – mikeinor

Join the “Does self employeed = dead beat?” discussion

“ Do I have horns sticking out of my head that I'm unaware of??? lol Who wouldn't like a hug-able, fuzzy, cute, panda? I would!!” – PY_2

Join the “What am I doing wrong?” discussion

“Heres a News Flash from a former official Phone Company Employee.The phone cops will not get after you if you don't answer your phone immediately (as in when driving). Likewise the Text cops would ... ” – RoxyRedhead

Join the “Has Texting Become the Scourge of the Dating World?” discussion

“ No one has responsibility for abuse except the person committing it. No one is arguing against the idea that she could use some help taking care of herself in this situation and in any ... ” – littlebluemonkeymind

Join the “Frustrated & Confused: Is He A Sexual Addict???” discussion

“ Was there a party I missed tonight? I thought only 2 were on the schedule! Did you miss me? ” – VB_Girl

Join the “Gimme some Friday Night Roll Call !!!!” discussion

“I think this is more of a chick question. Not a single male friend of mine ever obsessed because "she won't let me call her______." Or "I want to get married but she won't commit." I know I'll get ... ” – roguewolf1

Join the “Relationship "labels" - how important are they to you?” discussion



All times are GMT -7. The time now is 12:45 am.

Discussion Boards Archive

Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.1
Copyright ©2000 - 2009, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
Search Engine Friendly URLs by vBSEO 3.3.0