LavenderFields is offline LavenderFields Post #21  April 5,2009, 2:57pm
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Oh people, just flat out ask "what is your percentage body fat? what testing method you used? and what date (including month and year) was that?"


Jan 09, electronic measure of tricept, 25.1%, so 0.1% over the the good range.


There.. I am officially 'curvy' for my age...
 
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ladydoctor is offline ladydoctor Post #22  April 5,2009, 3:00pm
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noseyparker,565060 wrote :

With all due respect waltercl, the posts that I read coming from guys have little to do with the health of the woman. The usual cry is that they need to feel an initial attraction, which is impossible if the woman is overweight.
Yes. I am like a man that way. Cannot be attracted to a man who is overweight. The health issues are more important, but have nothing to do with my initial attraction.
 
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jayjay is offline jayjay Post #23  April 5,2009, 3:10pm
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...things seem to have gotten quiet around here.

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LavenderFields,565109 wrote :

Oh people, just flat out ask "what is your percentage body fat? what testing method you used? and what date (including month and year) was that?"


Jan 09, electronic measure of tricept, 25.1%, so 0.1% over the the good range.


There.. I am officially 'curvy' for my age...
"Warning. Dangerous curves ahead"
 
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jayjay is offline jayjay Post #24  April 5,2009, 3:13pm
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...things seem to have gotten quiet around here.

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ladydoctor,565112 wrote :

noseyparker,565060 wrote :


With all due respect waltercl, the posts that I read coming from guys have little to do with the health of the woman. The usual cry is that they need to feel an initial attraction, which is impossible if the woman is overweight.


Yes. I am like a man that way. Cannot be attracted to a man who is overweight. The health issues are more important, but have nothing to do with my initial attraction.
I had a thread back a week or so ago about how Height is basic information provided in eHarmony profiles but weight isn't. A numer of people mentioned how it's hard to get a sense of someone's height even from a full body photo and so this information was needed. It was claimed that in a photo you can better tell what someone's weight status is. It sounds like you're finding this isn't true, apparently because a lot of men don't put full body photos.
 
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angelofmerci is offline angelofmerci Post #25  April 5,2009, 3:48pm
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I do not think LadyDoctor is wrong to expect what we men expect, to match up with a woman whose height and weight are apportionate. Until man was able to rely on police protection and earning a living off the farm, women always chose men based on not just facial looks but for their ability to provide for them and protect them. Men have always in the past chosen their mates on the ability to have children. In early times that translated into a woman being slender as she not only had to be able to carry the child to full term but also raise the children which would have been harder or impossible for a larger woman.
 
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anita925 is offline anita925 Post #26  April 5,2009, 4:22pm
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waltercl,565039 wrote :

From reading past threads it seems that if a man posts something about weight then it can often be perceived as a sign that he is purely superficial and only cares about physical appearance.


I think your post highlights that beyond aesthetics it is also about health and well-being. I just don't think women understand how much men care about their long-term health and quality of life. It isn't that men want some sleaky slender thing because it is visually appealing or more sexy. No, they are just concerned about her health, and they recognize that being more on the slender side and having an emphasis on health and fitness is what is going to help ensure that she stays healthy and is going to be there to enjoy that life-long relationship he has planned for her.


Men take such a bad rap. I just thought I'd share that little bit of perspective.


Sorry for the thread hijack though. I know what you're getting at, and you're just trying to find the best way (while remaining as tactful as possible) to make sure your matches are what you're looking for.
Waltercl,


You had the most pleasant post on this most unpleasant of subjects. I'd like there to be a spot on the profile that states that you may be overweight due to an injury (such as myself) and are trying to become a size 2 again. Kind of like the smoking - "trying to quit".


I would love to find an SO who is understanding about my trials and tribulations on this subject and would love me enough to help me get back into shape once I am healed. Isn't there a spot on the profile that addresses the type of body you would like your date to have??


The world media is very hard on women who are "teddy-bearish". I think men have it much easier with acceptance of "overweight" status. This doesn't mean that we (women) care less about the mortality of our SO's, only that it's generally more acceptable for men to be "teddy bears". Simply, a double standard.


Sorry, I feel like a rambling hi-jacker now. Maybe I'll start another post. Happy reading everybody!


Anita
 
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outdoorjeanie is offline outdoorjeanie Post #27  April 5,2009, 4:53pm
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Curvy is overweight? I thought curvy in women was a woman that was endowed on the top with a good waist-hip ratio?





What is that called??
 
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jayjay is offline jayjay Post #28  April 5,2009, 5:54pm
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anita925,565203 wrote :

Waltercl,


You had the most pleasant post on this most unpleasant of subjects. I'd like there to be a spot on the profile that states that you may be overweight due to an injury (such as myself) and are trying to become a size 2 again. Kind of like the smoking - "trying to quit".


I would love to find an SO who is understanding about my trials and tribulations on this subject and would love me enough to help me get back into shape once I am healed. Isn't there a spot on the profile that addresses the type of body you would like your date to have??
Regarding 'trying to change' things....like 'trying to quit'....I've found it's not a good idea to go there. I've found 'trying to quit smoking' = chain smoker. I don't want to be in a position where I'm pushing someone to try to make a change they end up not really wanting to make.


As you wrote....having someone to support you would be a great thing. But what if down the road you decide it's just too hard? Then what? Do you want to be with someone you feel is trying to make youchange? I'd recommend being with someone for whom weight simply doesn't matter....or else waiting to find someone after you've made the changes you want to make.
 
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Benevolence32 is offline Benevolence32 Post #29  April 5,2009, 6:20pm
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outdoorjeanie,565240 wrote :

Curvy is overweight? I thought curvy in women was a woman that was endowed on the top with a good waist-hip ratio?





What is that called??
I think that's true by definition. I just got matched up with a woman on Chemistrythat has her body typelisted as curvy and all I can say is woooooowwwwww . Too bad their free weekend ends today, I won't make it to OCwith her in time.
 
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handy123 is offline handy123 Post #30  April 5,2009, 6:25pm
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Just ask, it will not hurt!!!
 
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