D_Lion is online now D_Lion Post #1  March 28,2009, 8:09am
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I talk about matters of current events, such as economics and politics, when the woman is willing and able to do so (most are not.) I talk about business, investing, real estate.


I talk about her career and subjects of university study – since those are things we both have knowledge on (whatever they are, I seem to have at least some information.)


I do not talk about entertainment products and celebrities – and pretty much lose interest in a woman when she speaks about such things being important (which has happened a lot.)


I do not talk about family (which most women want to do), which I think hurts me on a good portion of dates, though.


I try not to talk about personal consumption, like cars, because while financial resources are attractive, boasting about it is not. Travel fits this category too, but usually ends up being a safe topic.
 
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Cubby is offline Cubby Post #2  March 28,2009, 8:21am
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I am curious what topics will be involved when most people are with their dates for the first couples of dating? What if your date is a quiet person and you have to raise up a topic so that both can talk to get understand each other more?
 
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happyGoLucky711 is offline happyGoLucky711 Post #3  March 28,2009, 8:43am
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If you have a hard time talking about anything, that doesn't bode well for the future of the relationship. I've dated people that simply based on the conversation I knew we were incompatible.





If it's too awkward, then it's probably not a good fit.
 
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lucky173 is offline lucky173 Post #4  March 28,2009, 8:48am
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Cubby, I think it's best to stick to topics that you and your dateare bothcomfortable with, interested in and knowledgable about. (Ex. if you have a ton of interest in topic A and he has zero interest or vice versa - then obviously not a good topic to discuss)


I tend to have a problem with a person who is perpetually quiet. I don't mindraising the topics, unless I continuously have to raise them.When I've had to be the "starter" I'll ask them about their work, or field of study, a particularinterest or hobby of theirs that they may have mentioned, or currentevents. Something that should be able to draw them into the conversation with relative ease.


 
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Mangosteen is offline Mangosteen Post #5  March 28,2009, 8:48am
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I talk about hobbies - try to see if we have common interests in terms of activities -- or things that I'd want to try but haven't. I also like to talk about family, because I like hearing where people come from and how they got to be who they are today. I talk about where they have lived in previous parts of their lives. Basically I guess I try to find common ground.
 
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Cubby is offline Cubby Post #6  March 28,2009, 9:39am
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lucky173,552400 wrote :

Cubby, I think it's best to stick to topics that you and your dateare bothcomfortable with, interested in and knowledgable about. (Ex. if you have a ton of interest in topic A and he has zero interest or vice versa - then obviously not a good topic to discuss)


I tend to have a problem with a person who is perpetually quiet. I don't mindraising the topics, unless I continuously have to raise them.When I've had to be the "starter" I'll ask them about their work, or field of study, a particularinterest or hobby of theirs that they may have mentioned, or currentevents. Something that should be able to draw them into the conversation with relative ease.

Thanks for your suggestions, and also for all others' input.


I am quite a talkative person and find that "dead air" seems strange during a date. However, my friend told me that a man who seldom talk is a good quality. True?
 
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D_Lion is online now D_Lion Post #7  March 28,2009, 9:50am
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Moments of quiet, while you tend to your meal, or prepare your thoughts are fine – and much preferred to people who are uncomfortable with silence and start to babble.


Long periods, because we just don’t have enough in common, would not be (I can’t recall that happening.)
 
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David_Lewis is offline David_Lewis Post #8  March 28,2009, 10:03am
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I take an interest in the person I'm spending time with anddiscuss her personality, character and psychological temperament based on what she's wearing, saying, doing,and the wayshe's acting.
 
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wordwoman is offline wordwoman Post #9  March 28,2009, 10:13am
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Cubby,552472 wrote :

lucky173,552400 wrote :


Cubby, I think it's best to stick to topics that you and your dateare bothcomfortable with, interested in and knowledgable about. (Ex. if you have a ton of interest in topic A and he has zero interest or vice versa - then obviously not a good topic to discuss)


I tend to have a problem with a person who is perpetually quiet. I don't mindraising the topics, unless I continuously have to raise them.When I've had to be the "starter" I'll ask them about their work, or field of study, a particularinterest or hobby of theirs that they may have mentioned, or currentevents. Something that should be able to draw them into the conversation with relative ease.





Thanks for your suggestions, and also for all others' input.


I am quite a talkative person and find that "dead air" seems strange during a date. However, my friend told me that a man who seldom talk is a good quality. True?
Many quiet, reserved, shy men are good listeners, which is what your friend mightmean. I'm a talkative person too, and I get a lot of quiet, shy, reserved men in eH, which is OK since I grew up in a family of them and I've learned how to deal with them. One guy I dated, the whole meal and conversation thing just didn't work, he was way too shy for such a situation, sowe trieda pottery making class and we had a good time and good conversation. Afterwards, I realized that he needed to do something besides just sit across from me, so we had dates around some sort of activity from that point on, and low and behold, it worked like a charm. We dated for a couple of years.
 
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Ingytravel is offline Ingytravel Post #10  March 28,2009, 10:26am
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D_Lion,552486 wrote :


Moments of quiet, while you tend to your meal, or prepare your thoughts are fine – and much preferred to people who are uncomfortable with silence and start to babble.


Long periods, because we just don’t have enough in common, would not be (I can’t recall that happening.)


Ditto...


Because on down the line in a relationship...I would hope to have times where we were laughing, talking, discussing issues about things we both enjoy...and then those delicious moments in life where you are both snuggled up on a couch at either end...feet are touching, each have a book, newspaper, or magazine...raining outside...quiet.....and that occasional glance up, sweet smile, then back to reading:
 
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