Do you consider couples legally separated still married?


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VickiWA2008 is offline VickiWA2008 Post #1  March 7,2009, 2:34pm
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If two people are not living together (in different states) but have legally separated are they still bound by marriage? Can they date and consider themself single? Or is it cheating on the marriage? I was told it was done for religious reasons. Or financial like a paper marriage. So is a paper marriage really a marriage at all?





Stumped


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Vicki
 
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m8se69 is offline m8se69 Post #2  March 7,2009, 2:54pm
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VickiWA2008, wrote :

So is a paper marriage really a marriage at all?
Yes.


Next question.
 
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littlebluemonkeymind is offline littlebluemonkeymind Post #3  March 7,2009, 3:02pm
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Married is married. Divorced is divorced. In between is not single.


There are people who stay legally separated for a lot of reasons and don't divorce and they may very well date but they are not single and should not represent themselves as such.
 
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bigfincat is offline bigfincat Post #4  March 7,2009, 3:25pm
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I think that this can only be determined on a case by case basis.To me, it depends on where a person's head is at. Marriage is more about the connection between 2 people & little to do with the legal side.


I think that it is very hard or almost impossible for a couple to reconnect after they separate. That relationship will never be the same. Some may try to make it work but I would be skeptical that even those would not be truely happy.
 
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simpletonHeart70 is offline simpletonHeart70 Post #5  March 7,2009, 3:30pm
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littlebluemonkeymind,520195 wrote :

Married is married. Divorced is divorced. In between is not single.


There are people who stay legally separated for a lot of reasons and don't divorce and they may very well date but they are not single and should not represent themselves as such.
^this.





You can argue whether the couple are still in love or whatever, but unless you're just looking for a short-term relationship my advice is to stay away from those situations until the couple is legally divorced.
 
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bigfincat is offline bigfincat Post #6  March 7,2009, 3:44pm
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simpletonHeart70,520243 wrote :

littlebluemonkeymind,520195 wrote :


Married is married. Divorced is divorced. In between is not single.


There are people who stay legally separated for a lot of reasons and don't divorce and they may very well date but they are not single and should not represent themselves as such.


^this.





You can argue whether the couple are still in love or whatever, but unless you're just looking for a short-term relationship my advice is to stay away from those situations until the couple is legally divorced.
I agree with this if the couple had only been separated for a short time but there are people that have been separated for years & years for who knows what reasons. Also, a paper marriage may be looked at differently.


I do agree that such things could possibly complicate your life in some ways. There could no complications or many.It can be a form of baggage just like any other & I suppose it depends on whether or not you want to deal with any.
 
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musicchick is offline musicchick Post #7  March 7,2009, 4:00pm
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One of the partners can sue for alienation of affection if the divorce is not final yet.
 
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teacherlady is offline teacherlady Post #8  March 7,2009, 4:39pm
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bigfincat,520266 wrote :

simpletonHeart70,520243 wrote :


littlebluemonkeymind,520195 wrote :


Married is married. Divorced is divorced. In between is not single.


There are people who stay legally separated for a lot of reasons and don't divorce and they may very well date but they are not single and should not represent themselves as such.


^this.





You can argue whether the couple are still in love or whatever, but unless you're just looking for a short-term relationship my advice is to stay away from those situations until the couple is legally divorced.


I agree with this if the couple had only been separated for a short time but there are people that have been separated for years & years for who knows what reasons. Also, a paper marriage may be looked at differently.


I do agree that such things could possibly complicate your life in some ways. There could no complications or many. It can be a form of baggage just like any other & I suppose it depends on whether or not you want to deal with any.
I agree. I knew a man whose wife left him for another man, then dragged her feet for three years on the divorce--simply to collect alimony as long as possible. She was living with the other man at the time, but their state is very liberal in its interpretations of divorce laws, and because he made a good income, he supported her and her lover for three years. Sad, but true. The day the alimony was due to run out she began to move forward quickly with divorce proceedings.


That's obviously a different case than someone who is only "conveniently" separated, and there is a possibility of the marriage reconciling.


It may not be "moral" in the sense that if you define a marriage by a legal document, until the divorce is decreed the people are still married. However, I think it is immoral also to force someone to be legally bound to someone who only wants to take advantage of him/her.


As far as the wisdom of dating a separated person, obviously if the wife/husband is still in the picture in some form, it is very dangerous ground--for you. People will tend to return to a spouse who has rejected them if there is any possibility of a reconciliation, so you might not be doing yourself a service by getting involved with that situation. And obviously, you NEVER want to be the "other man" or "other woman," which it is easy for other people to perceive if you are involved with a still-married person.
 
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glassonlyhalffull_fillit is offline glassonlyhalffull_fillit Post #9  March 7,2009, 4:43pm
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married is married


separated is married


no ifs, ands, or buts
 
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simpletonHeart70 is offline simpletonHeart70 Post #10  March 7,2009, 4:44pm
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bigfincat,520266 wrote :

simpletonHeart70,520243 wrote :


littlebluemonkeymind,520195 wrote :


Married is married. Divorced is divorced. In between is not single.


There are people who stay legally separated for a lot of reasons and don't divorce and they may very well date but they are not single and should not represent themselves as such.


^this.





You can argue whether the couple are still in love or whatever, but unless you're just looking for a short-term relationship my advice is to stay away from those situations until the couple is legally divorced.


I agree with this if the couple had only been separated for a short time but there are people that have been separated for years & years for who knows what reasons. Also, a paper marriage may be looked at differently.


I do agree that such things could possibly complicate your life in some ways. There could no complications or many.It can be a form of baggage just like any other & I suppose it depends on whether or not you want to deal with any.
yeah, people can do whatever they want, I'd just suggest avoiding it.





The problem is, you may fool yourself into thinking it's an okay situation to get yourself involved with, but odds are it's going to be a mess. If the person cannont legally separate themselves from their spouse, don't get involved.


Soon you'll start getting comments about how they still love them or whatever. It's not worth the headache. There are enough divorced and single people around to not have to deal with these complications.
 
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