When You’re the Heartbreaker

When You're the Heartbreaker

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When You're the Heartbreaker


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MattOMA is offline MattOMA Post #1  December 3,2007, 1:29pm
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In all of my break up experiences that I was the initiator of, I made it a point to do it in person and make the issues clear and as courteous as possible. There were even a few times (like right now) that I was blown off or given excuses to the point that I had to end it, even though it was probably over for her long before it was over for me. But I have only been dumped once in person, and I think I was in high school at the time. I find it amazing that even with the virtual elimination of traditional roles of a man and woman, women still have a tendency to not do what needs to be done. Yes, it is hard, but leading someone on is a waste of that persons time and more hurtful in the end that doing what is right.
 
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kitten is offline kitten Post #2  December 3,2007, 1:55pm
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I'M SORRY! KITTEN.
 
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eharmonyadvice is offline eharmonyadvice — Advice Official Moderator Post #3  December 4,2007, 1:27pm

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No matter how you look at it, breaking up is never easy. If you happen to be the heartbreaker, you can make it easier on your soon-to-be-ex by adhering to a few simple rules.
 
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Denah is offline Denah Post #4  December 4,2007, 2:33pm
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I had my heartbroked about 5 months ago, I just have to say this is one of the worst pain I ever had. And now since I still in love with this person I don't want get involved with any other man becouse I don't want go through this pain again.
 
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pepperman is offline pepperman Post #5  December 4,2007, 9:42pm
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What if you know after the first in-person meeting that you're not interested in continuing the relationship. Yes you've been communicating for a couple weeks, but do you need to schedule another 'date' just to end the communication?
 
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pvt.line is offline pvt.line Post #6  December 5,2007, 7:08am
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Love comes + love goes. Married + divorces 4 X's number 5 is on his way here now. If you don't suseed at first try try again
 
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in2music is offline in2music Post #7  December 5,2007, 11:52am
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It is just as hard to break up with someone you love as it is to be "broken up with." You feel like you've lost your best friend. This article gives good info how you can try to do this as nicely as possible, and it does help, and i do agree that sometimes it doesn't matter how nice you are, it still ends up badly, especially if the other person involved doesn't agree with your reason and is unwilling to work it out. I really thought that my last boyfriend was "the one" and it was very hard breaking it off; I did try being as nice as I could.
 
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johnnyreb78229 is offline johnnyreb78229 Post #8  December 5,2007, 6:47pm
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I was in a relationship for almost 4 years before we decided it was not going to be a lifetime committment. In the end, we had some very honest and frank discussions over two week-ends, no yelling or fault finding, just heartfelt conversations and the realization that a "separateness" had been quietly growing. In the end, we held each other for a long time, kissed an emotional goodbye kiss and said goodbye. We had a wonderful and deep love, but we realized that there were things each of us wanted that the other would not or could not fulfill. Sad, yes. Heartbreaking, yes. But with no question that both of us tried and we did it as we had started: face-to-face, with class and concern for each other.
 
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m.a.gardener is offline m.a.gardener Post #9  December 6,2007, 7:29pm
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Five years ago, my fiancé and I broke up, realizing that we just were not compatible. He moved out, and we were still good friends for a year and a half - JUST friends and nothing more. Then I got sick (M.S.) and lost my job; he was getting ready to move at the same time. We agreed that he could move back into my house, and we would be roommates. That was almost four years ago. He's a great roommate, and that part has worked out really well! But as for being “in a relationship” – we are not, although he refers to me as his girlfriend. He has a drinking problem, and his goals and values are not like mine. So we truly are just roommates, except… he helps me out with rides to the doctor, some stuff around the house, and I help him out too. We hug when we have a bad day, but that’s the extent of our intimacy. But I want a REAL boyfriend and am now using eHarmony. Can you break up with someone you're not going with, but still living with?!?

 
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easyb is offline easyb Post #10  December 6,2007, 11:17pm
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i think its also safe to say that breaking it off with someone hurts quite a bit. no makeing it easier. however doing respectfully leaves you still feeling poorly yes, but you dont feel cheep. and when your feeling down, ill take any edge i can get.
 
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