What do you have to offer?


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shygrrl is offline shygrrl Post #1  January 10,2009, 2:25am

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A guy asked me this question and I was surprised by it. I didn't know how to respond.


I said I was a very nice person, very kind and loyal and loving. But I don't know if I misunderstood his question.





What does a women have to offer a man other than being loyal and loving? Are guys looking for something else by asking this question?
 
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Tantalus is offline Tantalus Post #2  January 10,2009, 5:10am
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I think I'd only ask this question if A) I didn't really care what the answer was, or B) I really wasn't sure about a match and wanted to test her self-esteem. Your answer sounds fine to me. As to why this specific guy asked the question, you'd have to ask him.
 
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gr8guy is offline gr8guy Post #3  January 10,2009, 5:21am
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You're better off without him. I bet he was fishing for you to say "a piece of @$$." Some people are stupid when it comes to dating/relationships. They think that it is all about them and have no consideration for the other person. His question sounds like a job interview question. Maybe you should have asked him "why would I want to date you?"
 
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LisaRey is offline LisaRey Post #4  January 10,2009, 5:31am
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He sounds like he has been watching Animal Planet too much. He is ruffling his plumage hoping to draw the female to him. I would have answered "Lots, and how about you?"
 
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legend29 is offline legend29 Post #5  January 10,2009, 5:36am
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I hate that question! I mean...really... what is this...a job interview?


Men (or women) that ask that question presume that they have so much to offer, how can any person measure up? Those type of people should all be gathered into one large room and be forced to date each other for an entire 72 hour period, with no sunlight, and only bread and water for sustenance. Let's see how they all measure up to each other!


BTW: I usually stare the offending questioner right in the eye and give my stock answer to that question: "I havefive broke-down Barbie dolls from whenI was 10y/o, aboutfifteen mix-matched socks,and a half-eaten bagel left over from morning breakfast.....any questions?".....


*rollin' eyes*
 
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Gr8Guyn2008 is offline Gr8Guyn2008 Post #6  January 10,2009, 5:42am
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I presume this was a Second Questions question. If so then this is a perfect conversation starter for OC.


I have been asked this question before. I begin my answer with "I am not sure what you mean by this question." Then I try and come up with some words as to what I have to offer, since I have no idea what I have to offer anyone
 
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angelofmerci is offline angelofmerci Post #7  January 10,2009, 5:59am
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legend29,423376 wrote :

I hate that question! I mean...really... what is this...a job interview?
Legend29...when you are dating you are infact "interviewing" for a position, a position that carries hopefully a life long committent. Hopefully the "interviewing"/dating process is successful so that the end result is a trek down the aisle and the exchange of vows.
 
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tbesq is offline tbesq Post #8  January 10,2009, 6:04am
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Sometimes men resent women because men are expected to jump through so many hoops to show he is a good match for her (the good money, the good job, the ability to protect and provide, paying for all of the dates), and women are perceived to just go along for the ride and not give much back in return. At some point, men want women to contribute something tothe potential/existing relationship as well. I don't think he was talking about sex, so much as he was talking about a great personality, being a good cook andcaretaker,and perhaps women being able to make a financial contribution toa potential/existing relationship.
 
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notyet is offline notyet Post #9  January 10,2009, 6:10am
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gr8guy,423361 wrote :

You're better off without him. I bet he was fishing for you to say "a piece of @$$." Some people are stupid when it comes to dating/relationships. They think that it is all about them and have no consideration for the other person. His question sounds like a job interview question. Maybe you should have asked him "why would I want to date you?"

+1
 
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deegoesgreen is offline deegoesgreen Post #10  January 10,2009, 6:14am
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tbesq -- I respectfully disagree. The question comes off as "all about me." I also disagree with dating being an interview. It's just plain getting to know someone. He'd have done better to ask something like, "What matters most in a relationship to you?" If communication continues, each person learns about the personality and such eventually. If someone is dating just to receive, then they're not going to have long term results. JMO.
 
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