Beginning to think it's just me


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cld2grd is offline cld2grd Post #1  January 9,2009, 7:32am
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Trying to stay warm!

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Okay... I posted recently about a match who came to meet me who ended up being "Just not that into me", right? Well the day I got that message from him, another contact on another dating site I'd not heard from in awhile contacted me. I'd talked with this guy for 3 or 4 weeks, very casually, every few days. He seemed nice enough and actually lives in my town (very rare!) but it always seemed very low key and casual and never seemed to be going anywhere. Then right before Thanksgiving, he disappeared and shortly after I cancelled my subscription. I renewed it last week and he approached me, told me he was sorry we lost contact before, that he'd gotten really sick, had to refinance his home and had holiday stuff and then I was gone. In his contact he sent his email address and his phone number and said "Maybe we can grab lunch or go out sometime. You seem like a really neat person and I'd like that if you're interested."

K... so I emailed him after getting that. Three days later no reply so I sent a text and finally got back an email saying it was good to hear from me and saying maybe we could get lunch and make a date of it. Asked me where I'd like to go. I told him I was wide open about location - anything from Sushi to McDonalds, and asked his thoughts. I didn't get a response by email. Finally got a text back saying he got my message, said he was working on taxes, asked what I was up to, seemed very talkative and then the conversation ended. No response to the email all. I waited two days, emailed him again just making a silly comment about taxes and he responded very briefly to that. Still nada about lunch.

Question is, is he just "not that into me" yet again, even before we've met? Or did something get lost in translation in the messages? I don't know if I should email and ask about lunch or just leave him alone at this point. Quite frustrated!

Thanks again!

Oh and off topic.. is there any way to change my password? I have some random one that I have to dig out every time I want to log on and it's a pain!
 
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cld2grd is offline cld2grd Post #2  January 9,2009, 7:33am
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Trying to stay warm!

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Please disregard the password question.. doh! Figured it out...
 
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SleeplessinTrenton is offline SleeplessinTrenton Post #3  January 9,2009, 7:38am
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What's the hurry?
 
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redknight881 is offline redknight881 Post #4  January 9,2009, 7:43am
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I can say one thing for sure...it's not YOU! This guy seems to just be a very busy person. That's not a character flaw, so you need to decide if it's acceptable for you to always have to feel like you're "chasing" this guy.
 
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tweet37 is offline tweet37 Post #5  January 9,2009, 7:46am
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Are you looking for a pen pal or someone to share a relationship ? This guy either isn't interested in a relationship with you or he is already involved with at least one other person.


I'm not saying close the match because you never know what's going to happen with anyone he may be presently seeing, but you have to keep your options available with other people too.


If you're going to suggest a meet-up with the guy, present two options (date, time & place) and put the ball in his court and see if he's serious.
 
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angelofmerci is offline angelofmerci Post #6  January 9,2009, 8:10am
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cld2grd... the guy's referral to "working on taxes" may be a key to his profession. I am only guessing since you did not mention what type of work he does. If he works for a corporation then he could be working with corporate taxes which will keep him busy through April due to yearly audit. The other possibility is he is a CPA which basically means the same, busy through April.


If I was going through this I would sent him a text or email saying no games then asking are you seriously interested in a relationship with me.
 
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SleeplessinTrenton is offline SleeplessinTrenton Post #7  January 9,2009, 8:25am
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angelofmerci,421917 wrote :

If I was going through this I would sent him a text or email saying no games then asking are you seriously interested in a relationship with me.
How could any guy honestly answer that question in the affirmativeprior to meeting the woman? People have various styles of getting acquainted andhave their own hierarchy of prioritiesin the allocation of time.
 
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simpletonHeart70 is offline simpletonHeart70 Post #8  January 9,2009, 8:27am
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what happened between him being into you then not having that much interest?
 
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constantseeker is offline constantseeker Post #9  January 9,2009, 8:35am
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I may not be the best at relationship issues, but I have to say that if you are not among his top 2 or 3priorities now, when everything is exciting and new, then you'll be less of one later - I've lived it. Don't go there - or keep him in the background, don't consider him seriously. Definitely keep your options open.
 
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blueeyedbrunette is offline blueeyedbrunette Post #10  January 9,2009, 8:40am
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Date other people and keep him on the backburner - if you push for velocity it seems he is telling you right now thats not feasible -- BUT-- he is keeping an open door so why close it ?


Dating is not Black and white- in or out-- its process
 
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