Is it possible for a man to start dating on a zero budget?


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brianthebrain is offline brianthebrain Post #1  December 6,2008, 6:21pm
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Times are tight, I'm on a pretty limited budget. I want to start dating, but it's really hard for me to find a way to do so.


I was recently laid off as my company sent our jobs to asia. So I'm on unemployment as I look for a job in the horrible michigan economy (9.3% unemployment).


I can probably meet women, like at a coffee shop or such. But is it possible to even date when you have zero expendable cash around?


I think most women would be creeped out at the prospect of going over and watching a movie at my home, if they didn't know me that well.


And there's the stigma of being unemployed and women not liking that fact.


Just curious if it's possible or if dating is just a luxury for those with money.
 
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neardc is offline neardc Post #2  December 6,2008, 6:41pm
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Well, yeah; it's going to be a lot harder to date if you're unemployed...lol. And of course finding a new job has to be a much higher priority for you now than meeting/dating anyone anyway. But, that being said, it's not necessarily impossible. Especially given the sucky job climate in MI, people are going to be more understanding of people who suddenly find themselves out of work (more telling will be what you are doing to rectify that situation...).


So, what do you do on a date if you have very limited means? Go for a walk/hike, go to a museum, drive around looking at holiday lights, look for free activities/performances in your area (e.g., through the county, the library, etc.), go window shopping, go visit another town, etc. Once you are at the point where you are hanging out together in each other's homes, you can add those DVDs, playing cards/games, cooking meals together, etc.
 
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Vaire1967 is offline Vaire1967 Post #3  December 6,2008, 6:44pm
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i wouldn't be so quick to judge yourself and your options in the dating world, Brian. i'm the type that goes on an individual basis - if you have one or a couple of traits i prefer to live without, but others that are really fabulous, i'd be willing to weigh the odds. i'm not going to shut you out without having an honest look.


We're going back to the money/income threads, and yes, having money is important and good; having a steady job is better. For me, at least, there's so much more to it.


If i knew that your unemployment circumstances were temporary, i think it would be a blast to see what all we could do on 10¢ per day! There's a whole world out there, baby.
 
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CasseCouer is offline CasseCouer Post #4  December 6,2008, 8:22pm
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Vaire1967,371176 wrote :

i wouldn't be so quick to judge yourself and your options in the dating world, Brian. i'm the type that goes on an individual basis - if you have one or a couple of traits i prefer to live without, but others that are really fabulous, i'd be willing to weigh the odds. i'm not going to shut you out without having an honest look.


We're going back to the money/income threads, and yes, having money is important and good; having a steady job is better. For me, at least, there's so much more to it.


If i knew that your unemployment circumstances were temporary, i think it would be a blast to see what all we could do on 10¢ per day! There's a whole world out there, baby.
I think it may depend on the woman; some women expect costly dates & lack of currentfinancial security is an immediate strike out, others can have a good time without spending a penny & will factor in your other pros & what plans you have in action. On the upside, it will weed outany gold diggers. Personally, I like walking park trails,the beach, hiking, playing at a playground, fishing, free matiness at local theaters, checking out books,going to meetup.com events, local holiday bazaars, concerts, playsetc. that are free, exploring a new town or neighborhood, our local college's $3 planetarium shows, playing online games together and/or attending talks at the library (or other places), cooking & baking together (along w/a bottle of cheap booze now & then adds to it!)finding the cheapest hole in the wall restaurants or bars, picnics, ice skating, sledding, arcades, people watching at malls or airports-trying to guess where they are going and/or what their lives are like. I realizethis kind of thing doesn't appeal to everyone, but if you would enjoy any of those ideas,it may be nice to find a woman who also enjoys the same things you do.


I read this article a while ago- 50 Cheap (or free) Dates
 
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metamucilmuffin is offline metamucilmuffin Post #5  December 7,2008, 4:55pm
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It's certainly a lot harder to date on a shoestring, especially if you are in a metropolitan city. And employment is definitely a big screening factor for people looking for LTR. But you don't have to kiss off dating altogether. I'd concentrate on getting fixed up by friends and family; they can vouch for your character and stability and also pick women who wouldn't judge you because of your job situation.
 
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Rudy_Project is offline Rudy_Project Post #6  December 7,2008, 5:51pm
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Of course, women are only after a nice smile and the kindess, protective love of a man.
 
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Songryder is offline Songryder Post #7  December 7,2008, 6:12pm
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brianthebrain, wrote :

Times are tight, I'm on a pretty limited budget. I want to start dating, but it's really hard for me to find a way to do so.


I was recently laid off as my company sent our jobs to asia. So I'm on unemployment as I look for a job in the horrible michigan economy (9.3% unemployment).


I can probably meet women, like at a coffee shop or such. But is it possible to even date when you have zero expendable cash around?


I think most women would be creeped out at the prospect of going over and watching a movie at my home, if they didn't know me that well.


And there's the stigma of being unemployed and women not liking that fact.


Just curious if it's possible or if dating is just a luxury for those with money.




I'm so sorry about your loosing your job. That's been happening a lot over the last 20 years and you never think it will happen to you . . . then it does.


However, there are creative ways to date without coming off like a cheapskate, which I'm sure you wouldn't be under normal circumstances, but you're undera lot of stress already worrying about how you're going to survive.


Dating on a tight budget gives you an opportunity to do smaller, but more meaningful things, like, yes a nice coffee house, a picnic in the park, taking walks, seeing who is "really" interested in you instead of your wallet.Start looking at finding local places to go like little concerts in the park, movies in the afternoon, window shopping just to look, going to Barnes and Noble and looking at your favorite books together, cooking dinner at home, etc.


So I wouldn't not date because of your situation. It's totally possible.
 
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gr8guy is offline gr8guy Post #8  December 7,2008, 6:27pm
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You could meet women at the unemployment office. At least they would understand your plight.


Seriously, I'd get a job, then a girlfriend in that order. Unless you meet one who is rich with a sister for me!
 
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treatmesweetly is offline treatmesweetly Post #9  December 7,2008, 6:46pm
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Speaking as a Michigan woman [southeast area]… We know that thousands of people have lost jobs over the past few years. Yes, dating someone without a job is worrisome, especially if it becomes a relationship. Will he/she look for and find a new job? Will he/she ask me for money?

All that stuff aside, when you find someone ready to meet you, you will need free/low-cost date options. Not knowing where you live or your interests, may I suggest:[/b]

- If you’re a reader, how about the library? Many public libraries have coffee shops and conference rooms you can hold meetings in (dates?), without being hushed.
- If you’re interested in history or art, how about a museum? There are many museums in southeast Michigan with admission prices under $8.
- If you like movies/theater, check out local colleges and community theaters. Many offer tickets below movie theater matinee rates.
- You could meander at the mall, unless the hustle and bustle of the Holidays annoys you (arrive early, parking’s a bear!). The difficulty is making sure that neither you nor your date turns it into a “shopping trip”. In general, women have no interest spending an hour in Sharper Image and men have no interest spending an hour in… any other store.

Obviously, if things go well, you can move to dinner and DVD’s at home. Good luck!
 
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Tantalus is offline Tantalus Post #10  December 7,2008, 7:41pm
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Given the number of women who still expect theman to pay for dates, I'd have to say no; at least, not long term, anyway. At any rate, it's best to get your life in order first. That way, the people you meet won't be forming incorrect assumptions about you.
 
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