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nancymargrit nancymargrit is offline
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haplesslover wrote :

nancymargrit wrote :


comedicdad wrote :


Divorces don't get any cheaper by waiting. If he's viewing it as too expensive, then he's probably looking at it in terms of either how much he's going to have to give to her or how much the attornies are going to cost. Neither one of those is going to go down by waiting - indeed, they will only go UP, which means he'll be "able to afford" it even less.





Are there kids involved? Maybe he's waiting for the kids to be out of the house so he doesn't have to pay child support.


no there aren't any children.
Does he have a lot of property and other assetsthat he'd need to divide? This doesn't necessarily need to include the personal stuff. If he owns his own business, his wife has the legal right is some states to go after half of that as well, especially if she's working in the business with him and helped him build it into what it is now.
- August 30th, 2008, 05:39 pm
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EMTZ EMTZ is offline
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Are you saying their marriage is now an open marriage? Have you by any chance found out from the wife herself how she perceives the marriage?
- August 30th, 2008, 05:55 pm
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BSchorr BSchorr is offline
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siren wrote :

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Their home was already wrecked, but you should walk away from this jerk. "Can't afford a divorce" is nonsense - I got divorced for about $200. It only costs a lot of money if they have to hire lawyers and argue about who gets the coffee table.


He's a sleeze who obviously has no problem lying tothe woman he promised to always be true to. That says a lot about his character in my opinion.


Go find yourself a guy who DOES care about being faithful to his partners and who can commit to you fully.


Remember: If he's not all yours, then he's still hers.


-B-


B-while the divorce may be cheap, sharing your great pension, that you have worked your whole life for, paying alimony, and child support are not cheap. I knew many men (parolees)who where working minimun wage jobs, had everything but the federal poverty level (about 275$/mo taken automatically from their pay-as we used to say, that is not enuff to live indoors)So, while your situation may be one reality, others have different realities. I've noticed you don't necessarily look at all sides. siren
Well, if he has a "great pension" then he can afford to get divorced. If he has nothing then he has nothing to take.


The financial implications of divorce vary greatly by state and situation. We know now that he has no children so that does away with child support. Infidelity on her part is going to make her claim for alimony a little tricky (infidelity on his complicates things too) in many states.


In any event, he isn't my concern - the OP is. And she needs to drop this creep faster than something you would drop really fast in my opinion. It doesn't make any difference what excuse he's peddling as to why he won't get divorced. The fact is that he's married to somebody else and clearly he's o.k. with being unfaithful. That's not a man the OP should waste her time with, in my opinion.


-B-
- August 30th, 2008, 07:00 pm
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Rutujit Rutujit is offline
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Well I was the other man once same kind of situation so I thought. I grew up with her as a kid lost touch and 14years later got back in touch. All the sparks were still there and things pick up. I always looked at it as a friend with benefits truly not sure you could any other way. Yes you get what you want but he goes back to her loving her or not. As long as they are still married do you really get what it is you want? As well it’s not an issue of right or wrong or feeling guilty. Down the road it becomes a morel issue and were you are with your values in life. So all in all only you know what you should feel on any of this.


wow it's on here twice lol
- August 30th, 2008, 09:21 pm
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sunnytxlawyer sunnytxlawyer is offline
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Everyone can afford a divorce. What he can't afford is you.... mixed in the divorce...





Get out now. He's not getting a divorce, because he doesn't want a divorce, and you fell for the oldest line in the book.....
- August 31st, 2008, 10:42 pm
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anaffair2remember anaffair2remember is offline
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I am in love with a married man and we have beenhaving an affair for over six months. He has two young children. I am well aware that it is the stupidest thing I have ever done and am aware nothing may ever come of it long-term, but for now I am happy.
- February 1st, 2009, 12:17 pm
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rlw2009 rlw2009 is offline
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anaffair2remember wrote :

I am in love with a married man and we have beenhaving an affair for over six months. He has two young children. I am well aware that it is the stupidest thing I have ever done and am aware nothing may ever come of it long-term, but for now I am happy.
As long as you both are happy and you both are aware where you both stand. You both might as well make the best of it becauseyou only live once.
- February 1st, 2009, 06:17 pm
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beautifulgenius beautifulgenius is offline
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karmagirl wrote :

Having been in a marriage where my husband was cheating on me for almost a year, I've always wondered what the other woman had to tell herself to justify doing what she did.* I guess now I know.* I don't even blame her though, because while he was busy telling her how unhappy he was and what a terrible marriage he was in, he was at home telling me that he loved me every day.* I didn't know he was cheating until the very end when things unravelled because he was "confused" and didn't know who to pick.* So, just remember that all the things he's telling you are the opposite end of the lies he's telling his wife.
Amen..
- February 1st, 2009, 06:34 pm
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inday inday is offline
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I'm sorry to say.... but I have NO repect to those women who tackle to a married man or vise versa...... I have NO respect to aman who tackle to a womanthast still married..... whether he or she can not afford for divorce.


Now my next question to this topic is..... are they still livng to each other?


If they do.... and if you are a smart person, my advice to you is...... you better get out to this situation becuase KARMA is always with youall the time.


It is easy for your situations right now because you are the other woman...... but if this situation will happend to you.... I will tel you its not easy to dealt with.


- February 1st, 2009, 06:34 pm
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angelofmerci angelofmerci is offline
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haplesslover, wrote :

I AM IN A RELATIONSHIP WITH A MARRIED MAN. MY BEST FRIEND HAS CHASTISED ME FOR IT BUT I DON'T FEEL GUILTY. HE AND HIS WIFE ARE VERY UNHAPPY BUT THEY CANNOT AFFORD TO GET A DIVORCE. I'M NOT IN LOVE WITH HIM BUT I COULD DEFINITELY BE THAT WAY SOMEDAY. HIS WIFE HAS CHEATED ON HIM SEVERAL TIMES WITH HIS FRIENDS AND SHE DOESN'T SEEM TO CARE THAT HE KNOWS. SO SHOULD I FEEL LIKE A HOME WRECKER AND END THE RELATIONSHIP OR SHOULD I CONTINUE TO BE HAPPY AND TAKE THE CONSEQUENCES AS THEY COME?
When I was single everyone was trying to set me up with their single or divorced friends. My mother invited a young single girl over to dinner that she had invited me to. The girl and I hit it off so I asked her for a date. The date went really well so I was going to ask her out again until I found out she was seeing a "married man" off and on.


If I were interested in you, then discovered you had or were seeing a married man I would drop you like a hot potato. In my books you would be a high risk for cheating and no one in their right mind wants a cheater.


I hate to tell you this but your post may have just cut down your matches on EH.
- February 2nd, 2009, 09:50 am
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