AwesomeOne23 is offline AwesomeOne23 Post #1  February 6,2012, 10:05pm
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If you've been dating someone for awhile and you think you really like them, when would be the best time to talk about becoming exclusive and how would you talk about it? I've been dating a woman for awhile and I really like her and I want to ask her if she wants to take it to the next level but I'm not sure if I should ask her now or wait until way later to bring it up. Any suggestions?
 
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brokensmile76 is online now brokensmile76 Post #2  February 6,2012, 10:20pm
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Being a woman; I can say that she is probably waiting for you to bring this very topic up. She is most likely thinking the same thing, wondering if she should bring it up to you. Especially if you say you've been dating awhile. Just ask her if she is interested in taking your relationship to the next level.
 
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Wiseman2 is online now Wiseman2 Post #3  February 7,2012, 3:40am
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You'll have to tell her you want "exclusivity" if you want to "take it to the next level"
 
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notyet is offline notyet Post #4  February 7,2012, 10:30pm
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the best time to bring up "exclusivity" is when you want to be exclusive with another. and you do it by saying. "i like (love) you and only want to see you. and i would like you to only see me. what do you think?"

or words to that effect.
 
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AwesomeOne23 is offline AwesomeOne23 Post #5  February 8,2012, 10:39pm
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notyet wrote :
the best time to bring up "exclusivity" is when you want to be exclusive with another. and you do it by saying. "i like (love) you and only want to see you. and i would like you to only see me. what do you think?"

or words to that effect.
When you put it that way it sounds very simple. If someone really likes you then they will agree to be exclusive.
 
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AwesomeOne23 is offline AwesomeOne23 Post #6  February 8,2012, 10:41pm
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brokensmile76 wrote :
Being a woman; I can say that she is probably waiting for you to bring this very topic up. She is most likely thinking the same thing, wondering if she should bring it up to you. Especially if you say you've been dating awhile. Just ask her if she is interested in taking your relationship to the next level.
I want to bring up the topic of being exclusive but maybe the fear of her saying no might be holding me back. Or perhaps, I want her to bring it up so that it takes the pressure off of me but I have a feeling that's not going to happen.
 
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Wiseman2 is online now Wiseman2 Post #7  February 9,2012, 1:42am
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Are you sure you are ready to date? There is no "fear of saying no".... You stick your neck out and state that it is what you are doing...it's not a question with a yes or no answer.

"I would like to focus on us and want to date only you".......It's a statement.....not a question.
AwesomeOne23 wrote :
I want to bring up the topic of being exclusive but maybe the fear of her saying no might be holding me back. Or perhaps, I want her to bring it up so that it takes the pressure off of me but I have a feeling that's not going to happen.
 
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emma_hazards is offline emma_hazards Post #8  February 9,2012, 5:13am
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Wiseman2 wrote :
Are you sure you are ready to date? There is no "fear of saying no".... You stick your neck out and state that it is what you are doing...it's not a question with a yes or no answer.

"I would like to focus on us and want to date only you".......It's a statement.....not a question.
I was wondering this myself. You're actively looking for dates online in your other threads, but you're been dating someone for "awhile" (months?) and want to be exclusive with her? *scratching my head in confusion*

Usually when you really care about someone and have been dating that long, you aren't interested in seeing anyone else. Asking for exclusivity is just a formality. You also don't worry whether she would say "no." You just aren't interested in seeing anyone else. Period. The fact that you are actively trolling for new dates, tells me that you aren't that interested in your girlfriend or in exclusivity.
 
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AwesomeOne23 is offline AwesomeOne23 Post #9  February 9,2012, 8:23am
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emma_hazards wrote :
I was wondering this myself. You're actively looking for dates online in your other threads, but you're been dating someone for "awhile" (months?) and want to be exclusive with her? *scratching my head in confusion*

Usually when you really care about someone and have been dating that long, you aren't interested in seeing anyone else. Asking for exclusivity is just a formality. You also don't worry whether she would say "no." You just aren't interested in seeing anyone else. Period. The fact that you are actively trolling for new dates, tells me that you aren't that interested in your girlfriend or in exclusivity.
It's not that I'm not interested. It's always wise to have a back up plan just in case things don't work out, that's the way I look at it anyways. For example, having a second job lined up just in case you get fired from your current job. The dating world is no different. You could be dating someone for a long time then suddenly, it dosen't work out and that's why it's wise to have other dates lined up just in case.
 
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harnomygirl is offline harnomygirl Post #10  February 9,2012, 8:29am
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AwesomeOne23 wrote :
It's not that I'm not interested. It's always wise to have a back up plan just in case things don't work out, that's the way I look at it anyways. For example, having a second job lined up just in case you get fired from your current job. The dating world is no different. You could be dating someone for a long time then suddenly, it dosen't work out and that's why it's wise to have other dates lined up just in case.
No. It is not wise.

You have to throw all your eggs into one basket for love to work at all. Relationships are inherently riskier than careers. You can't use the same rules.

You might lose several games, but the potential prize is worth so much more than any job can offer.
 
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