Tired of first dates

Maybe someone can tell me if I did something wrong in my most recent experience. It was definitely a kick the tires coffee date. We ended up spending 4 hours at the place talking. The conversation was very natural and easy -- we talked about work history, hobbies, growing up, college, etc. We had several experiences in common that we discussed. At the end, he offered me a ride home and I accepted. (Living in Manhattan where most people don't drive, this isn't usually an issue that comes up at all. I wouldn't accept a ride unless I felt very comfortable that the guy wasn't going to abduct and kill me.) We chatted more in the car, and when we reached my building, he said, "Well, you have my number." (At this point we had only exchanged messages on a dating site, although he did leave his number in the message in which we were confirming plans.) I said, "Yes, and I sent you mine earlier today." He gave me a peck on the lips and that was that. Two days later I sent him a message on the dating site that said, "Hey, I had a nice time. I hope you were able to enjoy your Sunday in spite of having to work. Let me know if you want to hang out again." and I included my real e-mail address. I never heard back from him. I was mostly surprised because I thought he was the kind of guy who would respond politely, "It was nice to meet you but this isn't going to work out -- good luck." I hate no answer because I can't tell if there was something wrong with my post-date follow-up or if he just wasn't interested regardless of my actions. It would be really helpful to know if it were the former.

In the past I've been over-eager with post-first date contact, so now I try to be more restrained while still being clear that I'm open to getting together again.

Two days later I sent him a message on the dating site that said, "Hey, I had a nice time. I hope you were able to enjoy your Sunday in spite of having to work. Let me know if you want to hang out again." and I included my real e-mail address.

If you had his number why didn't you call him, and why wait 2 days? Terms like ''hanging out'' sound like friend zone to me. And the whole conversation about phone numbers sounded really indecisive/lack of confidence/interest on both yr parts. 'You have my number.' That would've been a great time to say something about a second date and calling him.Waiting around for the dude to do everything is a dead end.

I definitely can relate to your feelings about first dates. However, please understand that experiencing "one and done" dates is par for the course when choosing to use online dating as a means of meeting people.

I don't think that's true. If that's been happening to you, then it's likely that your attitude that she's probably not going to be in your life too much longer is a factor.

If you meet someone and there is no tension or anticipation in your body language, there will be no chemistry. Most people NEXT for lack of chemistry.

You can feel someone's interest in you as a person. That can generate sparks. If one person is jaded it reduces the date to a question of physical attraction and nothing else.